Reviews For Bloodshot Eyes
Reviewer: Oregonian
Date: 12/24/13 19:50
Chapter: The Silhouette of a Beast.

Hi, MistReader. I have read your one-and-only chapter of Bloodshot Eyes, and would like to comment on it.

The best part of this short chapter is the description of Theador’s first encounter with a werewolf at the age of nine. It is a succinct bit of narrative, but you have included vivid details that make it easy to envision the action, and some unexpected touches, such as the fact that the werewolf turned out to be a boy and that he was later murdered by villagers who burned him in his house.

The story sounds as if you were young when you wrote it. Now almost two years have passed since you posted Chapter 1, and if you were to visit this topic again, you would probably amplify the first four paragraphs, adding more explanation of his investigation of the reports, a longer conversation with the old lady, perhaps another Auror to accompany him, and a more fleshed-out plan of operation for the evening.

Your ending hints at unexplained twists of the plot. We wonder why the bad dreams ended when Theador received his Hogwarts letter. Did something special happen then? We are assuming that Theador will save himself at the last moment from the jaws of the werewolf.

Do you think you will come back to this story?

Reviewer: BeauxbatonsWitch
Date: 02/26/12 22:45
Chapter: The Silhouette of a Beast.

Interesting story. I wonder if Leonardo Hawk is really dead, tho. One thing I noticed. The plural of werewolf is werewolves - not werewolfs.

Author's Response: And the spelling is, "though" not "tho". ;) I have edited the last few lines. Thank You for reading.

You must login (register) to review.
Information
Find out everything you need to know about the site right here.


We have stories and authors in this archive.

:

RSS
Choose Theme:
SOCIAL MEDIA
     
MOST RECENT
Severus's Prince by DestinyMoonStar Professors
What does Severus Snape do when a one night stand turns into a baby boy? ...
The Youngest Death Eaters: Year III by DestinyMoonStar 6th-7th Years
Year 3 A year of hard choices and tough talks: Destiny learns about...
Allegiance by ToBeOrNotToBeAGryffindor 6th-7th Years
During his final year at Hogwarts, Draco Malfoy had few illusions about where...
FEATURED
The Pretender by littlebird Professors
She feels the familiar pang of disappointment that they've never been better...
A Light in the Gap by WeasleyMom 3rd-5th Years
When Harry woke that first morning in Grimmauld Place, he wondered if Ron and...
Tapestry by Equinox Chick 1st-2nd Years
As Walburga Black stitches, Sirius rebels. Two poems written about the infamous...
The Weird Sisters - B-Sides and Rarities, Vol. 2 by ToBeOrNotToBeAGryffindor 1st-2nd Years
The Weird Sisters are back for an encore. Ten more tracks from your MNFF authors.
CATEGORIES