Ah, if only Cissy had decided to follow Andromeda... Bellatrix- I don't know what to say about her. She is twisted, but it is partially her family's fault for teaching her such values. It makes me wonder why some children follow in their parents' footsteps and others don't...
Great poem, by the way, and thanks, too, for giving me the information for joining the contests! I hope I will do well in them! :)
Author's Response: Yes. -sigh- The Blacks were a piece of work. I think the difference was that Bellatrix had an inherent cruelty in her which was unleashed by her service under Volders. >.< Thanks for the read and review!
I need to get round to reviewing all of the amazing poetry that comes out of PA. I'm such a failure as the mod. Ahem.
What always blows me away with this poem is the way in which you really took the prompt and made it your own. I love the way you incorporated the structure and rhythm of the original poem into the final stanza. It's a really powerful ending and you gave it such chant-like flow, which, of course, was the point. Basically, you aced it.
It really is a shame that there is no right align on the archives. Of course, your words are still just as beautiful and chilling but I did love the way you structured the format for the triathlon. It was aesthetically pleasing to the eye and gave each stanza separation which only added to its overall character as a poem.
I adore the flow. There is this wonderfully (almost discordant) rhythm to the poem that perfectly matches the atmosphere and narrative. Gah. It's beautiful, love. Just beautiful.
Your poetry always blows me away, Lafonna. But this one is particularly stunning and one of my all-time favourites.
Author's Response: A thousand curses upon the archives for lack of right alignment UGH. >.> But thank you for such a lovely review! :) It cheered me up to read this, and it's always an honour to know you liked my poems, cause YOU THE MAN, MAN! <333 ~Natalie
This is neat, Natalie! I had to read it a few times to understand what was going on, and I'm still not sure my interpretation is correct, but I think the effect is great. Very powerful, sad. I only wonder what happened at the end? For some reason, I could picture one last stanza in parenthesis, something that really confirms an unhappy ending - since I'm assuming it doesn't end happily. Ah well, what do I know - I can't do free verse, but I know this is good! Nice job!
Author's Response: Aaaaaaarrgghhh! I wish the archives allowed right alignment of text. >.< So much of the poem's intent is lost because everything is jumbled up. Basically, this is Bellatrix talking to Narcissa, after Andromeda has run away. The parts in parenthesis are an objective study of how Bella perceives Cissy, and the final chant they do together just shows neither of them will be defying their pureblood values. I hope that clears things up a bit! :) Thanks for reading and reviewing!~Natalie
Oh bollocks to the lack of the align function. Of course it doesn't matter really because this is such a superb poem and I did say in SBBC that it's the words that count and not the structure. Having said that, your original version was more aesthetically pleasing. (I'll shut up now)
What is so good about this poem, are the voices and how each is represented. Bellatrix, Narciss, and the silent voice of Andromeda that haunts Narcissa so.
Extraordinary poem. I can't give you an amazing analysis because I just aint that literary, but the chant at the end was incredible. I really heard the pair of them speaking and it sent shivers down my spine.
I could gush some more, if you'd like - but I suspect that's redundant. *sigh* Your poetry is so good. I really should be jealous, but it's like staring at ... um ... a Titian painting wondering why my crayon drawing doesn't look as wondrous. Okay, that makes no sense.
Heads for nearest exit in embarrassing shuffle
Author's Response: CROLL! I am glad you liked this one. My previous drafts were bad, so I just chucked them and started anew. I really wish we had a right text alignment option, but oh well. :( You don't have to give me an amazing literary analysis. Just the fact that you reviewed even though you've read this elsewhere made my day. <3