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Reviews For Neville's Song

Name: socks2 (Signed) · Date: 03/08/13 8:42 · For: Neville's Song
another really good one :) i feel like my comments are getting repetitive.

Author's Response: Thanks again. Never fear being repetitive... you are very good for my ego :)

Name: Nagini Riddle (Signed) · Date: 10/03/12 21:18 · For: Neville's Song
Isn't it funny that Harry AND Neville both had a hand in defeating Voldemort. I'm surprised at how similar the two are, really. They both grew up with relatives, because their parents weren't available due to evil forces. Both Gryffindors. Both defied Voldemort...

Very nice song! Neville is the unsung hero, especially since he finally developed that Gryffindor bravery and became a strong leader. It goes to show that what is on the outside doesn't always show what is on the inside.

My favorite stanza was when Neville said that he was a true Gryffindor, and would not resign from the battle, no matter if he was killed or not. That shows great loyalty, and I was happy to see that in there.

There were a few issues with the rhythm, like in the first stanza, the last line had an awkward beat. There were too many syllables for the beat you already set. I suggest changing it to "Lived bravery's cost," so it fits the rhythm better.

For the Herbology stanza, the rhythm was awkward again. I suggest to change it to this:

In Herbology
I'd find a place.
And only there
I'd show some grace.

The bit about the dance is unnecessary.

Overall, I really enjoyed this poem! Neville all the way. :)

~Nagini Riddle

Author's Response: Another good edit. I should ask you to beta for me sometime :) I was very fascinated by the duality of the prophecy and how it could've meant either Harry or Neville, like Fate had chosen it that way to cover all the bases. Only Voldemort's choice confirmed Harry as the Chosen One. JK made it kind of subtle in the books but I think it was meant all along that Neville would have to have some key part in taking down the Dark Lord along with Harry. I was very pleased when the "Spare to his heir" line came to me, as I thought it was just so very British and fitting here. Glad you enjoyed :)

Name: bearfoot (Signed) · Date: 07/29/11 17:04 · For: Neville's Song
Well done. You've captured Neville. I don't usually read poetry, But I've read your recent poems on Snape & Dumbledore and they were excellent as well. Keep up the good work.

Author's Response: Thank you. I am very glad to hear you are enjoying my work :)

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