I'm really liking this story so far. It's very well-written and, most of all, believable. Ginny is probably my favorite character, so it's great to see something that focuses on her story and develops her character. I love to think that she played a bigger role in the fight than is portrayed in the books. I really like that you've stuck to canon so well and the way you worked with undeveloped plot points like the scream at the wedding. Your descriptions are deep and there's a sadness to the story that brings a lump to my throat - but that's part of how it's so believable; these aren't happy times. That said, as great as your descriptions are, I don't disagree with the reviewers who suggest breaking it up just a bit more. I think there's a balance to be held between descriptions and dialogue, and this piece leans just a little heavily on the description. This is getting long, but one question - if Ginny is at home for the last week of October, then how is she also in Snape's office on Halloween, in the second chapter? I think I must've missed something about the timeline.
Anyway, great story, great writing, keep it up because I'll be watching for the next installment!
Very well written and a good theme. Again, I think it lingers a little too much on thoughts and feelings and so seems a bit heavy. That should be spaced out more - separated by actions and dialogue.
To add that the speech is formatted right into paragraphs instead of spaced out like all modern fiction. This makes the reading of it harder and more claustrophic.
Excellent. Maybe slightly over-long at the start with Ginny's thoughts so we reach a point of 'get on with it' but well thought out.
Great idea well executed.
Yes! I'm so glad that you finally updated! This really is a great story and I hope to see more soon!!!
Nice fic so far! Please update!
Perfect. I really don't know how other to describe it. Especially Snape, such a difficult character to portray, and you really nailed his emotions. And I love Ginny, its wonderful to see her and harry's relationship through her eyes. I'm so happy this story is back, and I can't wait for more
Author's Response: Thanks very much! This was my first time writing Snape, and I enjoyed working with his character more than I anticipated. I'll have the next chapter up as soon as possible! Thanks again for taking the time to review, I really appreciate it!
I was so excited to see another chapter posted tonight! Thank you, again, for another wonderful read. I love how Snape sees commonalities in Lily and Ginny. And my favorite part: the last two lines. I read them a few times to soak them in. Just perfect.
Author's Response: Thanks so much! The last two lines were actually the first thing that I wrote when starting this chapter, and they were the idea that inspired the rest. So I'm really happy that you noticed them in particular!
at first I thought this was a one-shot, but then I was sadly mistaken when I reread the title/description.
your writing style is lovely, and I love how you captured Ginny.
can't wait for more!
Author's Response: Thanks so much for your review! I'm planning on writing four more scenes of a similar nature, so the end result will be a collection of five one-shots connected by their focus on Ginny during her 6th year. The next one should be up soon.
That was really nice! I loved Ginny's characterization, and her thoughts showed just how strong she is. And who'd have thought that it was Ginny who screamed? Brilliant story can't wait for more! Update soon! --Nadia
Author's Response: Thanks very much! I really appreciate your taking the time to review. The next chapter is waiting for validation and should be up very soon!
Splendid. Simply splendid. The way that you describe things so deeply, the way you described the look in Harry's eyes, and it is amazing how you took something so small as a scream and wove it into a whole different story. Well done!
Author's Response: Thanks! I sometimes feel like I tend towards the over-descriptive (especially since I've never been a huge fan of dialogue) so I'm glad that you enjoyed it.
Oh, I like this idea very much probably because I really like missing moments fics, and you've chosen an interesting character. We all know Ginny is fiery and feisty, but here you've made her deeper and she has such an intense desire to do her bit, which is just how she should be.
I did like how you had her scream which distracted Molly. For one moment I thought she was going to hex her, and that wouldn't have been quite right.
Look forward to the next chapter. ~Carole~
Author's Response: Thanks for your review Carole, missing moments fics are my favorite too--I like the extra challenge of trying to work within canon yet still come up with something new. I just added the next chapter so it should be up soon. Thanks again!
This is an awesome idea. I'm really glad you're writing this because after seeing DHp2, I need some reassurance that Ginny isn't just super awkward, like the recent movies portray her! You're writing is really good and I'm looking forward to this fic :)
Author's Response: Thanks! That was part of my motivation--I feel like Ginny could be such an interesting and strong character, but so much of her development happens beyond the pages of the books that you need to fill some of it in yourself. I always felt like she got a raw deal in DH, being forced to stay out of the action just because she was a few months younger than the other three.
Wow! I think you've got Ginny down perfectly. My favorite fanfics are the ones that seem to fill in the blanks that Ms. Rowling left to the imagination. I could very much see this happening ... Molly, Ginny, her brothers ... all of it. My favorite part was when she saw the look on Harry's face when he let a bit slip about their plans with Voldemort ... when she saw in his eyes something deeper than anyone else understood. Very nice.
I'm trying to go through the same process with Draco ... filling in blanks Ms. Rowling left for us. While the books focus primarily on Harry, I think there are plenty of gaps in which to play around with other characters. Well done. I look forward to more!
Author's Response: Thanks very much! I love to fill in the blanks as well--it's fun to challenge yourself to work within the framework of an existing story, while still coming up with something new. This is my first time writing Ginny and we don't see as much of her in the books, so I'm glad you thought this stayed true to her character. Good luck with your own writing, I'll make sure to keep an eye out for your Draco piece! Thanks again!