Reviewer: sarahmustwrite
Date: 10/01/11 22:17
Chapter: Chapter 1

I love Dominique. She immediately gets my attention. I definitely see some of Fleur's attitude in her. And I am VERY, VERY curious to see what happens next. More, please?

Author's Response: Whenever I get my writing head on straight, this will be one of the first stories I update.

Reviewer: hogwartsbookwormsister
Date: 07/02/11 14:18
Chapter: Chapter 1

Makes me want to read more! Get to writing!!

Author's Response: So much to write, so, SO little time. *sigh* Thanks, hun. ;)

Reviewer: Liandrin
Date: 06/06/11 18:06
Chapter: Chapter 1

Ha! I really like Ali. I rather like your introduction of him and your protagonist's frustration with him. Poor Ali. ;)

“No, not small. She is... not old. What is word?”

Haha! Seriously, I love the exchange of dialogue between Ali and Jameson. Really, you dialogue here is quite natural and authentic. It's rather refreshing and amusing to read.

I am curious why Jameson boss congratulated him, unless he was trying to speak English. :P

“Sorry about that. It’s just that, I’ve met so many Muhammad’s and Ali’s while I’ve been in this country, I was beginning to think that the book of Most Popular Egyptian Baby Names had just the two names in it.”

Hehe. Yes, your characters are greatly amusing me. I know this story features a murder, but I can't stop giggling.

I look forward to the next chapter. Great start so far. :)

Author's Response: Haha, hey, thanks! I'm glad you are enjoying the characters so far, especially since there isn't much plot to speak of in this chapter.

I imagine the reason the Department Head congratulated him was that he was surprised by Alexander's intelligence; he's grown used to him being just the resident interpreter.

I'm glad that you were giggling! I usually try to be somewhat humorous.

Anyway, I'm happy you've liked it! I'll be updating soon -- I'd better if I want to finish it before the challenge deadline. ;D

Reviewer: mollytoone
Date: 05/29/11 15:45
Chapter: Chapter 1

I'm on the edge of my chair waiting for the next installment! I love the humanness of both characters. He wants to be more and do more . She also wants to prove herself. It shapes up to be a match made in heaven. Hopefully they'll both find themselves as their friendship grows and their self-confidence rises.

You did a wonderful job of showing how a maturing young adult struggles with his own personal Goliath and yet the Goliath is shared by another who feels he is also on his own. I suspect you will show the characters' growth as they emerge victorious from their personal yet joint battle for recognition, adulthood, self-actualization, self-esteem and self-control.

This was a very insightful look narrated captivatingly!

Author's Response: Thank you! That is so nice of you! I, um, didn't realize I was so deep, haha. =] Thanks for the review!

Reviewer: Verita Serum
Date: 05/28/11 22:00
Chapter: Chapter 1

Interesting start! Love the detail, I had a very clear picture in my head as I read along. :)

Author's Response: Thanks!

You must login (register) to review.
Information
Find out everything you need to know about the site right here.


We have stories and authors in this archive.

:

RSS
Choose Theme:
SOCIAL MEDIA
     
MOST RECENT
Argus Filch by BrokenPromise 1st-2nd Years
Written for the Anniversary Challenge v3 over on the boards - a double dactyl...
The Prisoner by weasley-malfoy-aficionado 3rd-5th Years
A prisoner of Azkaban reflects on what is and what could have been. Little...
Harry Potter and the Sinister Plot by weasley-malfoy-aficionado 3rd-5th Years
Patrolling the streets of Hogsmeade one snowy day Ron encounters an unexpected...
FEATURED
Come Home by WrenWinterSong 1st-2nd Years
Three year old Teddy Lupin ponders the photographs on the living room side table.
But You Haven't Lost Me Yet by Dawnie 6th-7th Years
The war with Voldemort comes and goes, and James and Lily find themselves struggling...
broken brights by Padfoot11333 1st-2nd Years
Harry's breath catches when he thinks of Ginny. I am not JK Rowling and...
CATEGORIES