MuggleNet Fan Fiction
Harry Potter stories written by fans!
(Signed) · Date:
07/03/11 21:58 · For:
I saw this and thought it could be interesting, since I've actually been starting to feel some tension between James and Sirius recently. I like how it felt like it could be possible, since it didn't change any James/Lily stuff. The point that it started because they were alone so often stuck out to me because I've been toying with the idea myself. While I was thinking maybe just a few kisses, I really liked where you took it. The characterizations were great, and it made me love Sirius even more.
Author's Response: Thank you so much for the lovely review! I'm so glad you enjoyed this, and even better, found it actually possible. I wanted it to fit in with both canon and character and writing this has sort of made me a bit of a James/Sirius person now. I could see it and could see it being very hard and sad for them. Thanks for reading this, I really appreciate the review! ~Gina :)
(Signed) · Date:
04/18/11 19:42 · For:
Wow! Generally I'm not much of a James/Sirius fan, so I was a little tentative about this story... but I had no need to be. Often to me James/Sirius stories don't really stick to canon and their characterisation, but this story did perfectly.
There was just so much vulnerability in both of them here, and fragility. I liked how you built up a sense of excitement at the beginning, particularly in Sirius, but by also having James' dream about Lily interrupted it shows a reluctance on James' part, which jars with that excitement. That usually meant…well, James tried not to think about that quite yet. That just shows what James is thinking and feeling so well.
“But what?” asked Sirius. “Don’t apologize, Prongs. I’m not going to be offended.” I think this really shows what you explore a bit later - that Sirius always knew it would end, and perhaps James did, too, and now they just have to accept it.
"Still friends?" he finally asked, terrified of the answer. He refused to think that his relationship with Lily would cost him his friendship with Sirius; he did not know if he would accept that. That shows such a vulnerability in James, and I really liked how you showed that he is truly afraid that Sirius would withdraw his friendship.
Sirius ruffled his hair, and James was sure his friend was wearing a smile that masked the underlying sadness he often hid from rest of the world. Wow. What a perfect way of showing Sirius' character. This is an aspect of him I completely agree with - underneath I think he misses his family... or misses the family he wished he had... and feels a lot more pain than other people, but he masks it all with a casual smile or a joke... and I think you're right, only James can really see through this.
A sudden lump formed in his throat, but James swallowed it away, determined not to let Sirius see his regret. I think this is an interesting line, because it shows how they have lost something in their relationship, in that James doesn't want Sirius to see his regret - therefore they are no longer as close.
I liked the joking cameraderie between them at the end - I think at this stage both of them are hiding their sadness, and yet it shows that they both accept it and want to make their friendship work despite the fact that it's so different now.
Anyway... this was a very long review, but I think you may have converted me to ship James/Sirius...
Author's Response: I've converted someone! Yay! You know, I hadn't really given much thought to James/Sirius until I wrote this, and now I love it, more than any of the other Marauder ships. There are just so many dimensions to explore, from their vulnerability to their closeness to their reluctance to part. I'm so glad you gave this story a chance and ended up enjoying it. As always, thank you so much for the lovely review!! ~Gina :)
(Signed) · Date:
04/18/11 4:17 · For:
My initial reaction?
AHH AKLJDGJ *FLAIL*
Perhaps that’s a bit…extreme, but, honestly, it’s how I felt from reading the summary to the last line.
I really love the way you wrote this pairing. It has this balance of emotion and fun that reflects James and Sirius’s characters. There’s desire for each other specifically, but it’s also something that just sort of happened. You summed it up perfectly with this line:
It was an innocent schoolboy diversion, fueled by the isolation of being away from home, the closeness of the dormitory, and too many nights spent nose-to-nose over Transfiguration books.
(Well, I don’t know about the innocent part…;D)
I like the snow. Sirius wanting to show James the snow was so sweet. I like how it’s more about friendship and just sharing it with each other than anything else. Sirius seems so innocent and carefree, like all his guards are completely down. It’s a side of him we rarely see and one, I imagine, only comes out around James.
It was cold, and James was glad to feel the warmth from Sirius's body next to his. It grounded him after the hectic events of the day.
I really, really like these two sentences. I think it says so much about their relationship. They don’t just need each other in the desire kind of way, but they need each other just as another physical force, as a friend. It’s so simply put, but it’s beautiful in its simplicity.
James seems kind of hesitant and awkward--That usually meant…well, James tried not to think about that quite yet. and James coughed. "Don't you think it's a little overexposed out here for…" He nodded down toward where Sirius was sitting, gently rubbing himself over James in a slow, seductive manner. I like that. It shows that he’s thinking about Lily and the future and what everything means and brings the ending around smoothly and naturally.
Their conversation is sad, yet strangely hopeful. The hope is there with the vague mentions of the future and of it being time to move on and Lily being different, but it’s underneath the sadness. There’s no regret, just reluctance, mostly on James’s part. I like that he’s reluctant to let go of Sirius and afraid of losing him to Lily, even though it’s Lily. Sirius’s matter-of-fact acceptance is very in character and it shows that once again he has his guard up, but James sees through it and I love that.
Sirius ruffled his hair, and James was sure his friend was wearing a smile that masked the underlying sadness he often hid from rest of the world.
It’s so tender and sad and sweet. You have a way of putting words together so simply and so easily that’s really beautiful. These words seem to capture everything about the moment so perfectly. I keep rereading that sentence and every time I do, it squeezes my heart, makes me smile, and I get this overwhelming sense of sadness and acceptance.
And, the ending— guh! That is all, really. It’s sad and—I’ve been sitting here waving my hands around in the air for almost two minutes trying to think of the word and I just can’t. It’s sad and it’s sweet and it’s beautiful and intimate and it’s like I can feel their emotions, feel how much they love each other and it kind of breaks my heart a little to know that it’s the end.
I also wanted to say that I really love how the only name they gave this was “a run.” It’s like what it specifically was and what it meant didn’t matter, because it was only about them and what they felt. It wasn’t really a definable thing, just something that existed between them, more like an extension of their friendship than anything else.
This was gorgeous to read and thank you for posting it. :]
Author's Response: Mere! *flails as well* Thank you so much for the amazing review! I don't even know what to say. THANK YOU!! You touched on so many things I am so glad came out through the narrative. Like Sirius - I absolutely think that him and James had a special relationship that allowed them to share things the others didn't. Perhaps not this, but I do think there was a side to Sirius only James saw. And you pinpointed two things I really felt as I was writing their conversation: reluctance but acceptance. Exactly. They know, especially Sirius. And like you said, I think it would be out-of-character for Sirius to make James choose between him and Lily. It just wasn't like that. So it's a bit bittersweet for them, but I think it's what makes them so close, the fact that they can have this relationship and yet still maintain their friendship. They just strike me as so natural. I think I like this pairing more than Sirius and Remus for all those reasons, but that's rambling. Thank you so much for the wonderful review. It's really encouraging since I've sat on this for son long and it's my first real SSP, not to mention a slight deviation from my usual James/Lily as well (although it fits with my long J/L fic, lol) Thanks again!! ~Gina :)
(Signed) · Date:
04/18/11 1:17 · For:
I loved this, it was beautiful. I espacially loved the image of the winter forest with the frozennstreams and such,,, the words came alive and I could see it all very clearly. Beautiful work.
Name: Padfoot Patronus
Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm glad you had such a strong visual image, I usually do as well when I write and am just glad to know it's come across on screen. I'm glad you enjoyed this story. Thank you so much for reading it and for the lovely review - I really appreciate it! ~Gina :)
(Signed) · Date:
04/17/11 14:00 · For:
You had a very drawing summary, Gina. I like how I get the feel from the narration that James and Sirius are both so vulnerable, breakable here. The emotions tightened for me when James asks if they will still share the friendship. You may have intentionally or unintentionally not written the sex in too detail and just for this story I think the absence of that helped me to connect to their emotional state. There's a feel of how nothing's going to be the same.
I love the title also. Good one!
Author's Response: Thanks so much, Akay! It's funny that you mention both the title and the summary, since I usually agonize over both. Yet for this story the title came quickly and the summary was easy. Funny how that works. I'm glad that James and Sirius's emotions came through here. I absolutely believe that they were close enough to allow one another to show vulnerability. I don't know why, I just do. I think I like James/Sirius as a pairing more than Sirius/Remus, and I'm a serious (haha) James/Lily fan! Your point about how James questions their friendship makes me wonder how things would have turned out if he had been forced to make a choice. But I think that would have been out-of-character for Sirius to force that choice on his best friend, so the point is moot, perhaps. And you are exactly right: nothing is going to be the same, but I think they are okay with that and ready to move on. It's part of growing up, and they grow up fast. Thanks so much for stopping to read this story. I really appreciate the lovely review! ~Gina :)
(Signed) · Date:
04/17/11 12:36 · For:
Very moving and realistic. I love the way you captured the boys' emotions at having to end their relationship.
Name: Equinox Chick
Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed it and that their feelings came across well. I really appreciate the lovely review! ~Gina :)
(Signed) · Date:
04/17/11 12:08 · For:
OH, sob. The line at the end. I just want to hug them both and frolic in the snow with both of them.
Fab story. Even when you're writing something as a bit of a tease, you manage to make it believable and well written. The blanket brazenly on the snow ir a case in point.
Nine thousand reasons to review this; top of the list is that it's great. ~Carole~
Author's Response: Thanks, Carole. I think I'm glad I let you and Natalie talk me into this. And I'm glad it's believable, because even with something non-canon (and who knows, this *could* have been canon!) I do want to make it believable. I rather like this pairing, I think. Thanks for reading and leaving such a nice review after such a crazy afternoon, lol! ~Gina :)