MuggleNet Fan Fiction
Harry Potter stories written by fans!

Name: Yurippe (Signed) · Date: 12/18/13 16:10 · For: Chapter 1
I really liked it, especially the parts about her loneliness.

Author's Response: Thank you for the review :)

Name: OtterMoone (Signed) · Date: 07/08/11 10:58 · For: Chapter 1
Awh.... I go to a school called Health Careers High School. As the name implies, we learn how to go into the Medical Field. This story makes me feel really awful. I never saw it as being inhuman.... I guess some people feel that way :( But, you made it feel real, so kudos to you.

Author's Response: D: My father is a doctor, and it sometimes amazes me how detached he can be from his patient's suffering. But I suppose that's professionalism. I'm glad you didn't feel offended or anything. :) Thanks for the review!


Name: hogwartsbookworm (Signed) · Date: 04/06/11 11:45 · For: Chapter 1

Thank you so much! It's beautiful! I love it! I still can hardly believe someone wrote something for me. XD

Now, I probably ought to add some substance to this review....

It is rather haunting -- as you said in the end chapter notes, a bit angsty -- but that fits the time it is set in, with Voldemort trying to take over, the Order outnumbered twenty to one and being picked off one by one, and so on.

Sorry, going off in squee-land again, but I just love that you decided to write about Molly/Arthur! They are just my obsession right now. I adore them.

Back to business. I think that you did wonderfully with Molly's characterization, and, from the little bit we see of him, Arthur's as well. Molly wanting to be a Healer in order to care for people sounded quite plausible. And then her decision not to be a Healer after all because, caring for their physical needs with proficiency, would force her to not care for the actual person, was very well done. I think that you've explained very well the aloofness that doctors are forced to display. And, like you’ve shown in this one-shot, Molly couldn't be aloof. She just couldn't! And I love the way you expressed that. Especially in this line, "There was no way she could have forced herself to concentrate on wounds and forget there was a breathing human body underneath them." It's poetic, really.

Um, I think I saw a couple of typos when I read it, but now I can only find one, and it is at the end of the paragraph that the line I just cited was in: you've got "healing not only saved human lives but required you to be inhuman yourselves. " I think that should be singular, yourself, so "required you to be inhuman yourself."/beta tendencies

Lastly, I just had to mention… perhaps it's bizarre, but your reply to an earlier review made me quite supremely happy: "As for the meeting, I planned to make it a bit drawn out but it was going into...er...a territory which might not be appreciated by the presentee." I'm having a hard time putting why that makes me so happy into words, but I think it's because I am just so appreciative of your censoring your natural impulses for me… Yeah. I really can't find the words to describe it further, so I'll leave it at that.

It was a wonderful, beautiful fic, Natalie, and I love it! Thank you, thank you, thank you so much!

Author's Response: Heyyy!

Itís great to get good feedback from a fellow Molly/Arthur shipper, but itís fantastic to get an amazing review from the person Iíd written it for. : ) Iím so happy you liked my characterization of Molly Ė she cares too much for people to be aloof, and yes! You got it right. I kept it smut-free for you.

Thank you for pointing out the yourself/yourselves thing. Itís one of my Achillesí heels when it comes to English grammar. I have edited the story accordingly. Thank you for reviewing! Iím thrilled you liked it.


Name: WeasleyMom (Signed) · Date: 04/05/11 11:36 · For: Chapter 1
Natalie, I loved this little one-shot. You know I agree with you about all things Molly, and I was so pleased to read her as the intelligent, capable witch that she is. I do think she would be vulnerable, and I like how you made her lonely on her own... it makes sense that she would choose for herself a family life that would render lonliness nearly impossible.

Your Arthur was wonderful as well--I do hope you decide to write more of these two at this age. I haven't seen a lot of it around, and you really do the pairing justice.

It was so sad when she was imagining her own inability to care for her own brothers in the same situation she had overheard at the hospital... what a painful foreshadowing of what is to come for her. At least she will be free to grieve as a sister, and not the healer.

Really well done.

Author's Response: Hello!

it makes sense that she would choose for herself a family life that would render lonliness nearly impossible.

That is the angle I was going for. We don't know when her parents died, but the conditions she lived in. Her brothers weren't with her, people had started dying, and what if her parents weren't there either? I see Molly as someone who thrives in human company, so being solitary wouldn't be the best way to live for her.

I'm happy you liked my Arthur even though he appeared only for a short while. I am now thinking of writing more of them. And - yes, I can't get over the fact that she's going to lose her brothers soon. :(

Thanks for reading and reviewing, Lori!


Name: Writ Encore (Signed) · Date: 04/05/11 11:33 · For: Chapter 1

This is really good that you’ve written Molly as a regular person and not an over-the-top magical witch. She’s just a person going through simple, everyday things, which makes her relatable. I’d never thought of her as the lifelong caretaker of her family; that’s a good point. We are who we are. You have a lot of this is “quotes’ in one paragraph, and I missed the effect of that, so I’m reading back over it. We know who this patient’s sister turns to, and the attempt to relate it is written so simply, too, which is talent. A simple plot, a simple reflection, is a good thing to have in your back pocket for parallels.

I get the “quotes” now as bits and pieces. That’s a good, strong, first fuzzy reaction. You’re right that healing is not medicine is this sense, yet it bothers me that folks see physicians as robots. Maybe I’ve spent too much time in hospital, but behind the scrubs, it’s not like they see people, cadavers as stats, and that protects their composure. I always fear a doctor will be locked in a position to treat one of their own, for, they too, are more than bodies caked in insurance, they are humans. Fair point.

You have grammatical errors here and there that need a glance over and some polishing, but on the whole, this is rather sweet. Short and sweet, and worth a smile.



Author's Response: Hello Jen,

First of all, I didnít know it was possible to write Molly as an ďover-the-top magical witchĒ. Sheís talented and overprotective, but Iíve never seen her as over-the-top in canon or fanon. O.o I put the quotes for a reason Ė not as bits and pieces, or to signify a ďfuzzyĒ reaction, but to reestablish the off-handedness with which the Healer treats the case.

Which brings me nicely to the next point: Doctors as robots. No, I donít think they are. My father is one, so I should know. But I believe there is a level of strong detachment which doctors have to exercise as a principle. Why do so many doctors stay away from examining their own when things get serious? They canít afford to be emotional.

I donít mean that they are uncaring Ė far from that, but a seasoned doctor, who has seen far too many cases in his or her life, would indeed begin to treat it as a job. Of course, there would be exceptions to the rule, but when your job entails you to treat the wounded and the nearly-dying every day of your life, it is understandable why your mind would develop a defence mechanism against getting emotionally involved with your case.

The Healer in my fic, for instance, is a senior one; he is interviewing candidates, after all. It wouldnít be realistic to portray him as being sentimental about hearing that a patient died. He is busy, he is working, and I hate to put it bluntly, but to him, it would mean just another casualty, unless he knew the deceased and his family personally. Perhaps, when he is alone, he might reflect over it and feel a twinge of grief, but would he betray that emotion to someone who is interested in taking up a job in Healing?

Wow, this turned out to be an essay, but I love having my brain picked, so thank you for that. I do wish you had given me a few instances of those grammatical errors. I adopted a certain style of writing for this; it contains a lot of sentence fragments, but I did it deliberately to build a picture of what Molly has been going through. Thanks for reading and reviewing, though. I know you are not the biggest fan of Molly, and it must have been a real challenge to click on it, in spite of the warning in the summary.


Name: Neville-Love (Signed) · Date: 04/04/11 20:19 · For: Chapter 1
I've always been a fan of Molly, and I think you created a lovely characterization of her. Well done!

Author's Response: YAY for Molly fans! I'm happy you liked it. Thanks for reading and reviewing!


Name: Gmariam (Signed) · Date: 04/04/11 17:05 · For: Chapter 1
That was very sweet! I absolutely believed the entire beginning about Molly becoming a Healer. Her thoughts were very well done, especially about her brothers. The connection to her not wanting to be alone and having a large family is perfect. The only thing I wanted more of was Arthur. Just a bit of set up so he didn't show up out of the blue. Of course that's why they ran away, but I would have liked a bit more from their meeting. That probably wasn't the point of the story, but you write young Molly and Arthur so well it would be lovely!
~Gina :)

Author's Response: Ahhh...I never even considered adding much of Arthur because I wanted to focus on Molly. As for the meeting, I planned to make it a bit drawn out but it was going into...er...a territory which might not be appreciated by the presentee. D: I do have an idea in mind, so I might as well write it some day.

But YAY for the successful characterisation of Molly. You have read PI; you know how I feel about Molly. >.< Thanks for reading and reviewing, Gina. <333


Name: The_Real_Hermione (Signed) · Date: 04/04/11 15:41 · For: Chapter 1
This was beautiful, Natalie, as usual. I loved your characterisation of Molly, she was just so realistic. This reminded me of the scene in OotP when she was trying to get rid of the boggart and kept seeing her family members dead. I guess in canon it's easy to forget how much Molly has already suffered in losing her brothers and her parents.

I loved your exploration of healing - as in healing not only saved human lives but required you to be inhuman yourselves. I think that's a really interesting idea, it definitely had me thinking, as it does seem to be a common thing for people to say 'I want to help people, I'll be a doctor'. I loved how you show that you have to distance yourself to actually save people.

I really liked the ending, particularly "they ran away, even if they didn't have to". I think that's very fitting. I do wonder though if you need the last sentence ("finally, she was content.") - to me the story would end better without that line, I think that's sort of obvious to a reader.

Anyway, loved the fic :)

Author's Response: Healing and being inhuman. My dad's a doctor, so I should know. :D I've seen him checking up on people and he's just so disconnected. It always made me wonder. I do think it is true, that you need to detach yourself from feeling scared or sorry or worried and just get your emotions out of the way. I just don't think someone like Molly, especially when she's in the state where I have put her in this fic, would be capable of doing that.

I am glad the characterisation worked for you. I love Molly, in spite of her mollycoddling, and I don't understand people who dismiss her off as "the housewife with the kids". She is a talented witch, a loving mother and a generous woman. She's rather career-driven when it comes to her kids, and she did elope during the first war due to the war itself, not because she just fancied getting married. >.<

Whoa. Small rant there. I'm passionate about characters I love. Lol. I agree with what you said about the ending. I don't even remember why I felt the need to add that. I'll go and remove it rightaway.

Thanks, again, for reading and reviewing! You're amazing.


Name: blueowl (Signed) · Date: 04/04/11 13:38 · For: Chapter 1
WOW! Your characterization of Molly was wonderful. The part about her seeing the pateint as Fabian made me gasp. Poor Molly! Thanks for a wonderful fic!

Author's Response: I do think that Molly had a tendency to love people too much that she couldn't see them hurting. :( I'm glad you found my characterisation wonderful YAY for that, and thanks for reading and reviewing!


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