What a great story. It's amazing what love can do and the changes it can produce in a young man.
Hahaha Carole this is brilliant. I have absolutely nothing of worth to say except that I loved it xD The humour was great as well as the more saucy parts heheheh. The plot point with Regulus and Barty was also really interesting. Anyway, I really must sleep now but I just wanted to let you know how much I enjoyed it. Keep on being fabulous!
Author's Response: Yay! You should do more Russian, it makes you leave lovely reviews - hee hee. Thank you, Julia. I;m glad you enjoyed this. It was written a bit off the cuff but i think there was a point somewhere to the story. ~Carole~
super cute :)
Author's Response: Thank you.
Amazing! I loved this story. It was really good. There were some very funny lines I laughed at, especially in the beginning. Cute Lily and James interaction, you may get this a lot, but you really should write this paring again. And it was good to see Professor Dumbledore sum up what was going on at the end. The last line was perfect :)
Author's Response: I write James Lily quite a lot, actually. It's just that generally it's under the Marauder category. You might like 'Sixth Time's the Charm' or 'First Date Disaster' and 'Veils'- they're James/Lily. Thank you for the review ~Carole~
I loved this story! :3)
Author's Response: Thank you ~Carole~
Author's Response: Ta :)
I loved it! It's so cute, so simple, so casual yet well-knit. Nothing complicated or convoluted, and like so many of your stories, it sounds perfectly canon and so very JKR.
There are some hilarious lines (like the Vanishing cabinet), some great moments (Remus Langlocking Sirius-I love Remus having some edge), some great character insight (JamesJamesJames!!), some great coversations (Dumbledore and McGonagall) and some really enticing smut that I rather wanted to keep going, heh heh.
The fight with Regulus and Barty was brilliant, and the scene in the dormitory was perfect. I loved gentleman James.
But the last line was AWE- sorry-AMAZING. Does it mean a sequel??
Really great story, Carole. I'm rather envious. You always set the bar so high in these challenges. Good luck!!
Author's Response: Thank you, Gina. Oh, I'm not sure about you needing to feel envious. Your James/Lily stories are sublime and really DO set the standard. There's always some twist you add that makes it well worth the read.
I liked the Vanishing cabinet line - took me a while to come up with it, but it made me giggle.
Oh ... sequel ... um, not sure, really.
Thank you, again and again and again ~Carole~
Oh wow, this was wonderful. I enjoyed it so much and you have such a unique writing style. One of my favorite James/Lily oneshots for sure. When I saw the Slash rating, I was uncertain who it would be, and was worried it might by Sirius and Remus. I do not have anything agaist homosexuality, I just don't see them together. The Regulus and Barty pairing was very well written and I enjoyed that. Lily and James were very cute together, and I am glad it wasn't a "smutty" sex scene. I loved Minerva and Albus's conversations!
Very beautiful piece :)
Author's Response: Thank you very much. I don't like Sirius/Remus ,much either, although that has a lot to do with the fact that they are my fictional boyfriends *snort*. I'm pleased you liked the story. James and Lily are one of my favourite couples, so I wanted to write something primarily about them. Thanks again ~Carole~
I loved this. I am so jealous of your ability to seamlessly slip into one day in the life of the Marauders and write it so thoroughly and convincingly.
Your "not" mentioning Mary Macdonald made me smile, and I thought you did a great job incorporating the prompts subtly so it didn't feel as though you were constructing a story around the prompts, but rather that the words just happened to be in this lovely story you were telling :).
I liked the bit with Regulus and Barty--it's such a unique rare pair that I would never have thought of. I'm happy that James didn't plan on spreading the news to Sirius. I think you really emphasized his honorable side here, the side of James that Dumbledore saw Head-Boy potential in.
Gorgeous writing here, Carole. The only thing I could have asked for was a bit of Martha Macdonald and Sirius, but the story was really more about James and Lily (loved The Scene, by the way) and I thoroughly enjoyed it :)
Author's Response: Thank you very much, Ariana. I wasn't sure how far to go with The Scene, but decided to veer on the side of subtlety, so I'm pleased it worked. Barty/Regulus just sort of evolved as I wrote the story ... not sure why, but I may write another story about them.
Ah, Martha/Sirius, well, I'm not sure what to say about them at the moment. I didn't want to make this too compliant with Lions and because I haven't quite worked out the mechanics of the seventh year.
Thanks for the review. ~Carole~
Okay. Whoa. No. I meant 'learn their methods to be insane'. Don't want to get political here there at all. Oh, and the boy thing was just because I think Crouch is a creeper, who learned to be a creeper. I see sexuality as biological, not a choice. I agree with the experimentation - but totally wasn't going there. Sorry that was unclear. Crouch scares me more than anyone, except for Greyback, in the series.
But, as I say, this was good. Glad to see you're back. That surprised me. Sorry for two reviews.
Author's Response: Oh, that's cool then. I did read it wrong. ~Carole~
*claps* Yay, for joining the club! You should write this pairing often. I loved this story.
I like how you touched on the idea of codes of conduct in both the pairings given here. I don't know how to put this any less crudely, or should I say abstinence. Very tastefully dealt with! You give us both before and after which makes it rounded.
When I read the Dicken's quote, I was immediately reminded of the prompts in the lilyjamesfest on the livejournal. Did you partially write it for that? You could anyway, it totally works.
Author's Response: Um, I don't write for livejournal - never got around to it so I haven't seen the Dickens quotes. I basically googled this about 10 minutes before submitting (yes, I'm that deep!).I do actually write this pairing quite a lot, but it tends to get put under Marauder era. I'm not sure either couple abstained - but I guess I abstained from writing the actual sex.
Thanks for the review ~Carole~
Oh my God. Can you hear the surprise in my voice? (You’re probably thinking along the lines of this, ‘No, I can’t. It’s text you fool’.) I have not read a Marauder fic that is so dam good in months. You’ve always made me rather envious as to how you pull this off time and time again. And with such skill, might I add, because it’s not in a flowery, mundane, hormone, melodrama-driven voice? The whole way through you crafted this thing with an element of surprise.
The only things that I question, if, indeed, that’s the right word, are the voice of the Professors and the drinking thing. The two Professors sound like they come from one of those 18th century sympathetic novels, a little too refined. Maybe that was your intention. I don’t know. You did nod towards Mr. Dickens. And I know that they are both old, I do. I don’t know. It sounds like they were inserted. It’s hard to explain and put into words. That probably makes no sense.
And, on the second point, it surprised me that you portray the Marauders as such heavy drinkers. I know that the drinking age is different in different areas of the world, but that sounded off, too. In my mind, they’re a comparison for the duo of Fred and George. They aren’t, of course, Fred and George from another time, but their mischief might have been lighter. And, the Professors, as folks of the education system, don’t call out for this? Maybe they’re all grown …
Whatever. It’s your piece. Take it for what you will.
The plot here is something that I haven’t seen in a while. That fact that Remus won’t even go there with the girl is so funny! And he just curses somebody? His friend. Just like that. I’m laughing all the way through. You do not jump down a kid’s throat. You do not. And Peter? Wow. I mean, the whole thing with Lily. You built that idea well.
Can I just say this? It’s going to sound inappropriate, and I’m biting at my own words. You have style. First off, the whole thing with Regulus and Crouch is just … so subtly written and I feel so bad for Regulus because Crouch is, like, my definition of insane. I actually said aloud, ‘Get you another, boy’. Folks learn to be that way. I can’t imagine, though it is cool that you don’t dwell or focus too much on that because it says so much more that way. Wow. And the scene is the bedroom just makes me smile. Usually, and not just in fan fiction, like, everywhere, people think they have to write sex scenes like the chirographed, highly impossible crap of the movies. ‘Smut’, as you phrase it, turns me off. But this? It’s not like ‘insert jaunty love scene here’. It’s not too graphic; it’s more like a steady flirtation, not something caked with adjectives and clichés. Well done. I can’t even … that’s a fine hand.
Again, I have to say, though I imagine they didn’t know the finite details, that the Professors would be so cool with the way she wooed him.
The slash and dormitory thing, though. Wow. You’ve talent in fine lines. I …
Well done. Best thing I’ve read here in ages.
Author's Response: Thank you for the review. Much appreciated.
The Professors - I don't think they sound old fashioned and it wasn't a nod to Dickens (I googled that quote at the last minute, if i'm honest). Dumbledore does speak very correctly (ie no contractions) and I could really hear his voice in the words about laughter in the same vein as he talks about music. McGonagall is also a correct speaker, and probably becomes more so when in the presence of the Headmaster. Besides, they are older, and this is only 1978, they wouldn't be talking street slang.
Regarding the drinking. To be frank, the Marauders in my fics don't drink enough, certainly not for the era, the country and the boarding school culture. Just getting paralytic on their birthdays is really quite restrained. The UK is very relaxed about it's drinking laws in comparison with other parts of the world, and I've grown up in this drinking culture ... In other words, I write what I know.
I actually said aloud, ‘Get you another, boy’. Folks learn to be that way. I'm not sure what you're saying here. If you're implying that people 'learn' to be gay, then I can't disagree with you more. People experiment, or perhaps are born either gay or straight, but it's not learnt. That ... um ... sounds rather prejudiced, but I could well be reading what you've written wrong.
My view of Barty Crouch jnr is that he was probably was insane when he became Moody, but as a school-boy, I think he was as impressionable or as 'normal' as the next boy. In my mind Regulus is the elder boy (I think there's a year between them in the books) and Regulus is the one forcing the pace, as it were, in their relationship. Certainly Barty is the one who is far more scared of what James could reveal. (In my mind, that is)
I appreciate the words regarding the fine lines. Whilst I'm not averse to spicing things up here and there, I wanted this to be a bit more subtly. Oh, and no, McGonagall didn't really mean for Lily to get quite that close to James. I believe she thought that Lily would show more propriety ... ~Carole~