I really love this insight into Severus' mind, the obsession with academia seems very like him. However, I do have to wonder how he could receive failing grades? I was always under the impression that Severus, along with Lily, was favoured by Slughorn - surely he would take the time to read into whatever Severus had submitted?
Also, I can't fathom how Dumbledore would have gotten his information about where Severus had been? Wasn't Severus the only spy? Or is Dumbledore really omniscient?
Anyway, overall it was a really great fic, and kudos for you for managing to write a completely in character Severus :)
Author's Response: Thank you for reading and reviewing! We all know how happy it makes us to have proof that our writing is interesting enough to comment on... Yes, you might be right, Slughorn probably favoured Snape. Although, that is an ooc Slughorn rather than Snape, which I can live with. (And on a side-note; I do think Slughorn would be quite harsh to the students he wasn't charmed by and Snape was hardly charming at school...) Dumbledore is definitely omniscient. Didn't everyone know that? Ok, Ok, I admit, I just needed a way for Dumbledore to confront Snape and I didn't entirely think it through... Thanks again for the review and I'm glad you thought Snape was in character. Although his "voice" in canon is pretty consistent so it didn't feel that hard really... Or perhaps I'm just too obsessed with him...
Hi there. This is a well written and well-crafted story. I'll admit that it's not my usual type of fic, but I was intrigued by the summary, and I do like fics exploring Snape.
I do have a bit of an issue with his motives for joining the Death Eaters. Whilst I agree his fascination for the Dark Arts was fired largely by his intelligence, I think there was a compulsion for him to belong to something. He was desperate, after all, to make become part of Lily's life. Although it could have been seen as a childhood whim, he kept up the friendship for five years at Hogwarts when he could easily have let it drop. But he didn't, he wanted to be a part of smoething and that as much as his deep need to prove himself is a large part of who Snape was. I'm also of the opinion that he had huge admiration and fascination for Voldemort - not as fanatical as Bellatrix, admittedly, but there is an attraction to him. I think his need to be accepted is largely why he told Voldemort of the Prophecy.
Your use of first person (not a POV I usually like) is very well done here. Snape is such an obsessive/self obsessive character that the first person POV suits him.
I really liked the scene with Dumbledore - you wrote him very well (and he can be a hard character to get right). I have a bit of a quibble about the knowledge of the Dark Mark. They weren't common knowledge. Sirius, in GOF, has no idea what Karkarov is showing Snape on his arm. Now, if Dumbledore had known about the Mark, then he would have shared that knowledge. he only kept secrets when he had a good reason.
Meh, sorry, I sound very picky and negative and I don't mean to because this really is a well written piece. And it is your interpretation that counts. What I've said is merely my opinion ... and that can, of course, be wrong.
Good story, well done ~Carole~
Author's Response: I agree with you on that Snape is a very lonely (and in this story young) man who has never really felt communion (is that the right word?) and that this is a huge reason for why he joins the DEs. However, I think he's way too proud to admit it to himself. I don't think that inside Snape's head he would be going: I'm so mad because people have left me and sad because the girl I want doesn't want me, I think I'll go join the DEs to feal truly a part of something<--- That's an exaggeration but still.
Therefore ihe gnores this part of himself and rationalizes instead. That was why I incorporated Dumbledore into this, to show the reader that Snape has deluded himself and is NOT as independant as he thinks. He says: Do you think you’re the first man who thinks he has only become involved for academic purposes? He uses the words "thinks he has become involved" rather than simpy "has become involved". I guess it was too vague :)
About the Dark Mark, however: I forgot. Ah, now this will bug forever :PAnyway, thanks for reading! Truly makes me happy that you found it worth to comment on!:)
Very interesting fic, particularly as it's your first one!! (My first fic was definitely nowhere near this good...). So. Firstly, of course, I have to commend your characterisation of Snape. The idea that he joined Voldemort simply to experiment with magic and his own ability is very fitting, but personally I think there is an underlying security, a desire to belong, which he is too arrogant to admit to himself. Lines like this - I knew I didn’t belong anywhere and I didn’t need a gang. I simply wanted to explore. - I think were great - it shows his arrogance in his own abilities so well. I loved how you showed that he believes he's got things under control, that he won't be forced to do things he doesn't want to. I think in general this fic really sets his character up for who he becomes.
And Albus was just fantastic in this! I loved how you drew the two of them together - after all, they are very similar. Brilliant men who thought they deserved better from society than what they got. Who hated life being mundane. So that interaction between them was great.
I also like the point you made about how sometimes we just have to put up with life being boring or uninteresting. That's just life. But Severus doesn't like to see it that way.
Anyway... rambling here a bit... great character story!
Author's Response: Thanks for reading and the apprecation! I'm really glad you got the underlying insecurity in Snape. He IS brilliant but he's also a complete failure when it comes to his social life. And everyone, unless really mentally disturbed, has a desire to belong. So instead of thinking of himself as a failure who can't make friends, he thinks of himself as this brilliant loner of a genius. Thanks again, for reviewing! :)
Wow. I like this very much. It's so terribly short though ;) I love how Snape seems to shine out of the dialogue. He's witty and practical but not so much as he's in the novels itself which goes to show that he's still to learn. But there is no doubt that he's the same man. So you did a brilliant job at the characterisation.
I also loved the motives you gave him. He's a person who thinks he's fulfilling his own purpose, finding his own way, that he can't ever be "made" to do something. Oh, how sad! Like Regulus indeed. Sad also because Lily didn't understand this either like many other people in the novels and the audience as well, might I say. Or maybe Lily didn't want to. Hmm. Snape is an intelligent guy and sometimes people like him they want to experiment a little of everything to see what niche they want to be a part of.
I've had a look at your list of favs and you sure are a fan of dark, unresolved characters. I recognise a few of them from my own list. Where your story is going to be added next.
Author's Response: Thank you for reading! I'm so glad you liked it, it's the first story I've posted so it makes me truly happy that someone found it worth to read :) About the characterisation; Snape is really young here, and yeah, young people tend to be arrogant about their own abilities. I'm pleased that got through. Also the parallel to Dumbledore's youth; he was also incredibly gifted and understand him more than Snape actually understand. (Yeah, Regulus is also one of my favourite characters and my next fic is gonna be about him and Barty Crouch Jr... I simply cannot resist the bad-boys who are maybe not so bad... OK that sounds lame:P) Again, thanks for reading and reviewing, this made my day!