Reviewer: Equinox Chick
Date: 08/10/11 5:43
Chapter: Chapter 1

Unlike a previous reviewer, I do read slash. It's possibly the best type of romance available on this site being far more honest than fluff.

Enough of that. Your characterisationand portrayal of this relationship is so good in so few words. Draco's inability to act on his feelings and desires is actually pretty pitiful, but then Harry, here, isn't offering him anything. He's haunting him, and doesn't even know it. Possibly that's the best revenge he could ever have.

Brilliant. ~Carole~ (4)

Author's Response: Wow. I never even thought of that revenge part, but it strangely makes sense. Damn. I want to write more Drarry now. Thank you so much, once again! And SLASH FTW!!!

Reviewer: Evora
Date: 03/09/11 19:17
Chapter: Chapter 1

All I can think of right now is this: how the bloody hell did she pull it off again?

The beat was flawless, the words flowed, the sequencing was beautiful. Hell, the whole thing was beautiful! Personally, I’m not a fan of Draco-centered poetry that involves slash (it’s slash, isn’t it?) but this—this I fully appreciate. The poem had that angry atmosphere that is most certainly Draco-ish, but the anger isn’t like that “I’m-begging-you-to-kill-me-now” kind of angry – more like the frustrated, confused, and wanting kind of anger. Which is what I have imagined Draco would act when he falls in love with someone he didn’t even consider being in that sort of situation with. The poem just screamed ‘Draco’ to me. That’s a feat, I’m telling you since I’m not easily convinced with poetry. Granted, I haven’t read a lot of Draco poems, but out of the four or five(?) I’ve read, this is the first one I ended up liking. Maybe because I liked how the poem not only has pure unadulterated frustration, but of wondering thoughts, a sense of hope and the fear of venturing into unknown boundary. The whole thing had that perfect balance of emotion and fluidity.

So now, it’s pretty obvious how I adore your poems (if you don’t already know that). Another thing I loved was the concept of the poem. A single color dominating his thoughts, overpowering him in the night, and eventually, in the day.

Next day, the green sheets,
And green hangings,
And green curtains
Are gone.

This was adorable. I think Draco’s determination to rid himself of things that give him reminders is sort of his pet peeve. This stanza illustrated that wonderfully.

One day,
Not a night,
It consumes the atmosphere
Again.


This is my second favourite stanza. ‘One day, not a night,’ – you write how it haunted and consumed him in nights where there is nothing else but him and his mind. Simple five words that summarized numerous restless nights and what thought was behind the fault.

Isn’t that why
He still dreams
Of green,
But never has it?


Just absolute wow. An ending of denial. I honestly don’t know how you think of these beautiful things, words and ideas. You keep surprising me with your endless amount of creativity and imagination, and craftiness. If your mind is a home of these poems, I would really love to visit it. Great poem, Nat, as always. :-)

-Dinny.

Author's Response: This is the first Draco poem youíve liked?! I hope you didnít hate my ďI Am ShameĒ. *bites nails*

At any rate, Iím super happy I managed to convince you, though. Youíre right. This poem is about denial, and I do think Draco would be unable to exactly show his love to somebody who he never expected to fall in love with in the first place. Hence, the ďangry atmosphereĒ, as you call it.

I donít really buy Draco/Harry either, but it was an interesting challenge for me. The things MNFF makes me do. :)

You donít want to visit my mind, trust me. Itís a field of waste with a few pretty flowers thrown in. Thanks for reading and reviewing, Dinny! This review was so beautiful.

Reviewer: Kerichi
Date: 03/07/11 17:10
Chapter: Chapter 1

I'm the curious type, :D, so I had to go look up the challenge this poem was inspired by. I found: This poem is to be based on a non-canon pairing that seems incomprehensible to you, but you must portray them in a flattering light. Convince the reader that these two belong together.

I can't say I think you put your mystery couple in a flattering light or that at the end of the poem I thought belonged together. It seems a poem of obsession with undertones of denial (removing green from his room, the cold nod) and self-hatred (the scream, waking nightmares, the refusal to act on his feelings: "all he can do" and "But never has it).

If I had to guess, I'd say this is an AU Draco in denial about his feelings for Harry poem. With the trial and grudging thanks (and the green sheets/green eyes/things he would have to disown it definitely has that vibe. 

Since I don't read slash (if I'm right about the pairing), I'm glad you didn't spell out who your angsty protagonist is and who he's obsessing over. The poem has an interesting rhythm and picking through the poetic clues (or reading clues into the words if I'm wrong, heh) was a nice challenge.

 

 

 

 



Author's Response: Oh yes, I agree that this didnít fit the challenge. I actually wrote two entries, and neither followed the prompt in the end. Itís a sad habit of mine to go off in another tangent. ;)

But then, I liked them too much to change them. Thanks for reading and reviewing! I do like leaving clues. Hehe.

~Natalie

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