I think this is a lovely start! You touched on so many things that should be touched on when exploring Lupin's life, from his job issues to his lycanthropy to the loss of his friends. I notice there was no mention of Peter and am curious how your Lupin feels about that.
I really liked him using the name John for some reason. Such a nice detail.
While I noticed an occasional awkward turn of phrase - for example: "would not ever be washed away" might be "would never be washed away" - it's really a matter of preference and I thought your writing was very smooth and natural and easy to read.
I think you did a wonderful job with Lupin and have already, in one short chapter, set up a good cliffhanger! I look forward to more, so good luck as you continue!
~Gina :)
This story captured me instantly! I've always wondered what happened to Remus in this time gap. The story is beautiful, I think you've captured the emotions perfectly in this story. I can't wait for the next chapter!
Author's Response: That's great to hear- thanks a lot for the review! I hope that the next chapter won't be too long in coming.
What a cliffie!!!
There are so many things to like about this chapter - the little details of his existence really bring it to life - "Muggle Composer Peter T...," the titles of the magazines he's got lying around, the meager breakfast - it all adds up to a life I can really picture.
As something of a curiosity, btw, the building Daniel Radcliffe bought in NYC is nineteenth century with a room in the basement that can be rented out. All those buildings are pretty much the same, and those basement apartments are down f few steps from street level, sometimes with the door under the stairs up from street level to the first floor. I am now picturing this going on in one of those apartments, and I have to laugh because I think the first thing your OC would have said about the fireplace in NYC would have been, "Wow, working fireplace - you're lucky!" whereas in Britain I am quite sure there are many apartments still without central heat because of the age of the housing stock. So I got a good little laugh at myself in there...
The way he has chosen to work in the Muggle world because it hurts less when he's rejected by Muggles really speaks to me. I see him doing the same thing. It makes good sense, and it is to irretrievably sad that his life is this way.
Just a lovely story. I await your updates breathlessly. Too bad you don't know anyone who could draw you some illustrations for it... :-)
