MuggleNet Fan Fiction
Harry Potter stories written by fans!

Name: Theloonyhermione (Signed) · Date: 09/22/12 17:01 · For: Chapter 1
This was very good, and I liked the way you captured Remus. He came across to me as a very loyal friend, and I think is right for him to just seem almost shocked that his own friend would betray him, that his own friend would do something this bad. I also like how you added Harry in, but this made me think about something; why didn't Remus ever visit Harry when he was a child? Maybe you could write a story about that, as you seem very good at capturing Remus. Great job again!

Name: Equinox Chick (Signed) · Date: 01/27/12 7:59 · For: Chapter 1
This is a rather sweet story so I’m sorry I missed it when it was first written. As a Marauder fan, I’m quite picky regarding their characterisation, so I’m pleased to be able to say that I can’t think of anything that stood out as out of character for Remus or any of the others that you mention by association.

I was intrigued at the thought of Sirius disguising his true feelings for someone and wondered throughout who it was. At first, I thought Lily, and then I thought James. This was made more likely in my mind by this line because I couldn’t see why Sirius would tell James but not Remus.

Sirius never knew Remus had known about his feelings; he never knew anyone but James knew.

Therefore, it was a bit of a surprise when I read your author note and you revealed it was Sirius/Remus, but when I read back that made sense. Poor loves, perhaps if Sirius and Remus had confided in each other, then none of the feelings of mistrust would have been allowed to fester.

I really do love the idea of this story, Rachel, because Remus is so often seen as a lone figure, and this story shows his essential solitary nature but how the Marauders brought him out of his shell. The little details like them buying him sweets for Christmas showed how underneath the jokes, they really did think and care about him “ which I think is canonically correct. I also loved the way you placed Sirius with Peter in certain scenes, showing that they got on, and it wasn’t continual abuse from Sirius towards ‘Wormy’. Peter was a Marauder, and they wouldn’t have put up with a total idiot.

The end came out of the blue. I was puzzling and puzzling over who sent the note, and initially thought it was Dumbledore being enigmatic, but he didn’t know they were Animagi, so I’m assuming it was sent by Sirius. Except ... would he want Remus to tell Harry that Sirius was a traitor, which he’s have to tell him if he does tell the whole story? Hmm, not sure, but it’s an intriguing concept and a good way to end the story.

Lovely story, Rachel. Well done. ~Carole~

Author's Response: Carole, I can't believe I never responded to such a lovely review. It was sent by Remus and the note actually referred to a scene from a different story. Basically, I wanted Sirius to have hinted to Remus before the Whomping Willow scene that it was Peter's fault because the note only included a paw print, antlers and a moon. And the show this to Harry was the picture from a previous Christmas. Sorry that wasn't clear. I wrote the two stories within days of each other and wanted them connected. Once again, thanks for the lovely review and I can't believe it took me this long to respond!

Name: ravenclaw1997 (Signed) · Date: 08/09/11 15:34 · For: Chapter 1

This was a lovely story, and I can't believe it hasn't gotten any reviews yet! I loved the insight into Remus' feelings, and hearing about all the Christmases he had with the other Marauders was wonderful. It was very nice of James, Sirius, and Peter to have sweets and presents for him after his transformation on Christmas, even though they weren't Animagi yet and couldn't be there with him. It shows how strong their friendship was just as much as them becoming Animagi does.

Sirius dressing up as Father Christmas was cute. I can definitely see his younger self doing that, and I think it would be quite entertaining. I loved all of the mentions of the Christmas the Marauders, Lily, and Harry spent together. Now I'm going to have to go read your other fic to find out more about it!

My only nitpick is that in this sentence:

"He picked up the picture from Harry's first Christmas and from it slipped a note, Remus bent over and picked it up."

There should be a period, not a comma before "Remus bent over and picked it up."

I loved that part, though! The note was great, and I could tell it was from Sirius. The doodle was a nice touch, though, and I noticed that there was nothing there representing Peter... Get a clue, Remus! :)

Overall, great job!


Author's Response: Thanks for the lovely review. That comma slipped through the editing radar... pesky commas! I'm glad you enjoyed it and I hope you enjoy the other story. Maybe sometime soon I'll have something non-Christmas themed up :)

Author's Response: Thanks for the lovely review. That comma slipped through the editing radar... pesky commas! I'm glad you enjoyed it and I hope you enjoy the other story. Maybe sometime soon I'll have something non-Christmas themed up :)

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