Oh Jill,
there's much more where that came from!
jessie this was really awesome!! im sure its no surprise who this is =P haha but u said it sucked but it doesnt little silly goosemunkus!!!!
Author's Response: Why thank you ms. Weasley!!!!!!!!! Tell Ron Harry and I say hello.
Jenny, is it? My darling that was simply plenipotentiary! I simply went psychotic as I devoured your little story like a slice of key-lime cake! What creative use of aphorism. This piece was simply an incredible bungei. I myself do not have any recollection of what in the mooch's blanket "Harry Potter" is, but it seems rather fascinating after reading your little honkadori. Toodle-loo, Joanne! Thank you for sharing this!
Author's Response: Ah, Pip, my friend. You are quite the exceptional joker. I must say, you could have kept up your double-account charade for months, and I would have never guessed. Well, thanks for your wonderful (and interesting) reviews! Chip chip cheerio!
HI!!!!! I read the story and thought it was wonderful!!!!! I could be the beta for your next story if you'd like!
Author's Response: Why THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ill let you know when I write another if you want to beta
I thought this was a great idea for a story and you explored this idea fairly well - especially considering it's your first fic :).
However, I did find your writing a little clunky at times. I think I would have preferred the flashback to have come earlier, and then you wouldn't have had to describe Narcissa's and Bellatrix's characters so much, you could have just shown them through that.
In general you seemed to tell the reader what was happening, rather than showing it. Lines like this one - "Her thoughts turned again to her sisters." - seemed a little superfluous, as without it, it still would have been clear that Andromeda's mind had returned to her sisters.
I liked the way you kept referring to the clock ticking by and Andromeda's anxiety for her family, but I would have liked it if you'd tied in her 'new family' as more of a contrast to her 'old family'. Also, the ending seemed a little strange to me - it didn't particularly seem to conclude your ideas.
Anyway I hope you don't take my review to be negative, that's not the intention, I just think you've got a great idea here which could be even better :).
Author's Response: Thank you so much for your review! I agree, this could have been better. I could have spent more time on it, honestly, but summer break had quite drained my perfectionist nature. Do you think there is room for another Battle of Hogwarts fic? I have been thinking of doing one...and I am sorry about my not replying for so long.
