Had to digest this installment a bit before my review.
Wonderful as always: and such insight to "the first time": of course Hermionie would have read books to figure out the basics. haha
I do like how this melds with Ron's thoughts during "The Question". I think most of us do keep second guessing ourselves, even with "the right one".
I can't wait for a couple of things that could be coming up during Harry's POV:
Firstly, with the dates you have attached to your table of contents on your author page, the tie to Arthur's story and his line about "Arthur, don't think about your kids having sex", was a nice touch. Little did we think at the time that a variant of that thought would be going through the foursomes minds as well. Can't wait to see if Ginny or Hermionie brings up the summer trip to the boys first, and then who decides that this is the day to ask the parents.
Second, ever since you decided to do this as a four part POV, I have been waiting for either Ron or Harry to slyly/embarassedly ask the other "did you diddle my sister?'. (or would be sister in the case of Harry/Herimoine. A not often used Americanism there.
You can almost see the boys glancing away from each other at their first meeting this morning, each knowing what the other has been up to.
Looking forward to lots and lots more!!!
And just exactly what kind of Player Rites will the Harpies be putting Ginny through...hmmm.
Thanks for the review
Ron, I suspect, will always second guess himself. Although he’s capable of hard work and great determination, he’s still nervous of failing when he tries to achieve something he desperately wants (like getting on the Quidditch team or, in this, getting Hermione).
When I wrote “Arthur” I knew most of the stuff that’s in this story (not every little detail, but the basics). I wrote the Hermione chapter first (months ago), but I’m still nervous about writing “naughty bits” (which is why I don’t).
The encounter will (as I’m sure you’ve guessed) take place in the kitchen in the next chapter, in which Harry thinks about hair, love, obsession, teeth-cleaning, friends, !Molly!, and dressing gowns. -N-
Poor Ron. He might try not to be a hypocrite, but when it comes to Ginny... I am really enjoying this story and look forward to more! Thanks for writing!
Author's Response: Thanks for the review. The final chapter (which you’ll be astonished to discover is called Harry ;-) ) will be submitted soon. -N-
I floved ron's 1st person POV, that totally nailed his character!!! I love how you have Ron's humor, insecurity, and his thought process and how they differ from Harry's (as they obviously should) but you showed everyone that Ron DOES have a sensitive, sweet, and romantic side to him that a lot of people tend to overlook. Incredible job as usual, can't wait until the next (last :( ) one!
Author's Response: Thanks for the review
Ron gave me a little trouble here, but while I was struggling I wrote “The Question” and that sorted this chapter out for me. Ron certainly has a romantic side, and he’s remarkably sensitive to Hermione’s moods. He usually spots problems before Harry (of course, he doesn’t always know what he’s spotted ;-) ). But Ron is from a large and loving family.
I am on the fence about this chapter. I enjoyed the story you were trying to tell but I am not sure I can digest the first person POV.
The insight into Ron's mind and what he is actually thinking is quite revealing. Yes, Ron has matured but he still has some growing left to do (I think). If there is one part I really like it is how Ron paints Hermione as beautiful; not typically beautiful, but the whole package for him. I also like his internal struggle about when he is going to talk to Harry, Ginny, and Hermione. That should be interesting.
Am I correct is thinking that your story about Arthur Weasley takes place on this same day?
Author's Response: Thanks for the review.
Four chapters, and four different first person perspectives. I’m sorry that you find it indigestible. This is my first real attempt to write all four main characters in trhe first person in one single narrative. Perhaps it doesn’t work. But it’s also my rudest story, and I wonder if that has something to do with it?Ron matured enormously during DH, but he will always be a little insecure. It’s obvious (I think) from canon that the hermione Ron see’s is different to the one Harry sees.
Yes, this is the morning before the events of “the Mind of Arthur Weasley” clever you!-N-
Oh, Ron! He is really quite endearing when he's not being a complete ass! You write Hermione/Ron very well when you want to.
I did not spot any errors in this chapter, you usually are very thorough.
So, yeah, the mods spat out my story. No rejection letter, so I must have missed submissions... figures. I'm just the blonde idiot from California.
On that note, I shall bid you adieu. Keep up the good work, please update often, you know the drill.
Author's Response: Rebekah (AngelEJC) Thanks for the review. I agree with your asessment of Ron. I’m not thorough, I simply know when to get help. You should see the versions my beta readers get! :-D -N-
I like this story you should update more often
Author's Response: Thanks I'm trying to update one chapter/story per week. There is only one more chapter of this. Can you guess what it's called? :-D -N-
GREAT as usual...more please(of all your writing)!!!
Author's Response: Thanks. Next up will be more of Strangers at Drkeshaugh. -N-
Loved it! Your Ron is so perfect! He's cool, sweet, he understands Hermione, and he's just adorable. Great job! Can't wait for the next chapter :D
Author's Response: Thank you. Ron is far from perfect (in my opinion) but he is perfect for Hermione and he does understand her, more than she gives him credit for. -N-
its a little too obvious......but it is good enough
Author's Response: Obvious? I wasn't trying to be obvious. Thanks -N-
Awww what a sweet chapter about Harry and Ginny.
Author's Response: Thanks for the review. -N-
You are a fantastic writer! I've read more than one of your fics and each makes me laugh or puts a smile on my face for the rest of the day. It's funny that you would write this chapter, since I really had wondered what had went on between Harry and Ginny when I read this fic a few months ago. So thanks for putting this up and update soon! ;)
Author's Response: Thanks for the review. This chapter, and the other two (Ron, and Harry, of course) have been sitting around almost completed for a while. When I started writing fanfics I decided that I wouldn’t write any sex scenes. I was wrong. The next two chapters are the closest I’ll get. -N-
Very good (as usuall)! You rally do have a knack for writing Harry/Ginny; as a faithful reader, I can't be more pleased with your work. There is just something about this couple that draws everyone to them (yeah, I know, gag).
I refuse to say "once again" keep up the good work, thank you for updating regularly, and responding so promptly!
Author's Response: Thanks for the review. JKR said “And I feel that Ginny and Harry, they are total equals. They are worthy of each other.” They're her characters, so she should know. Who is going to disagree with that? Not me. -N-
OH MY GOD!! That was one of the most romantic things I've ever read!! I think, out of everything I've read of yours, this is my favorite. I loved when they shouted they loved each other. I don't know what else to say, just that every part of this story made me squeal with delight - it was perfect
I keep telling myself that I’m not writing romance, but I am, aren’t I? :-D-N-
Thought we would have to wait for this in A&S, but that wait is over!!!
So glad you brought in the amoritentia and that was the real moment in HBP when Harry finally made the connection.
The guys viewpoints should be quite interesting, possible even the morning after??hahahaha
Thanks for the review.
A&S is 6th-7th years and this is (possibly) too strong for that rating. A&S is planned to finish before Easter, with an epilogue at the end of the school year.
The switch in Harry’s head was certain to flip, given the circumstances.
The guys viewpoints will, indeed, be the morning after. Next: Ron. -N-
As regarding your chapter end notes:
1) Your welcome,
2) It was awsome,
Author's Response: Thanks for the review. This one-shot is in the process of becoming a four chapter story (from four points of view). This chapter will be retitled Hermione, and the other chapters will be Ginny, Ron, and Harry. -N-
it was awesome!
Author's Response: Thank you :-D -N-
I loved this story! I'm so glad you told in Hermione's point-of-view. I think that made it even better. I laughed so hard in so many parts! Ron's goofy personality reminds me a lot of my husband's. I guess that's why I was so drawn to him in all the books! lol :) The story is so well-written, and I think you do a marvelous job of conveying all the little personality traits of Hermione and Ron, even down to Hermione having a homework journal. The ending was great too! I'll definitely have to read more of your fan fics!
Thanks for the review. My stories usually concentrate on Harry/Ginny not Ron/Hermione, so this one is unusual. There are always a lot of opportunities for humour when Ron’s around (and in a good mood) so I’m happy to hear that he made you laugh.
A lot of credit for Hermione’s personality must go to Lori (Weasley Mom), who correctly criticised the first draft of this.
I hesitate to say “if you like this…” but you might want to look at Ron and Hermione’s wedding (After Breakfast) and my “Potter Family” stories It Takes Two, First Sight and Sleepless Night. This has turned into an advert, sorry. -N-
I loved this! It's fun,light-hearted and not too long - everything I want in a story! Well done for a brilliant story that made me smile!
Author's Response: Thanks for the review. Making people smile is something Ron is good at, when he tries. -N-
Once again you've done a really great job with characterisation... I really liked Ron, and Hermione was also very good. I thought that at times she was still a tad too uptight though. I think after hanging around Harry and Ron for all those years she would have loosened up a bit more... but maybe that's just me.
The part in the restaurant made me laugh. Very funny and very Ron. I also really liked that you developed your characters - especially Hermione - in this fic, which is hard to do in a one-shot, but she had definitely learnt something by the end.
This fic was written really well as well and I really enjoyed it :).
Thanks for the review.
This Hermione is a lot less uptight than she was in the original version of the story (thanks to WeasleyMom’s pre-publication criticism). My defence is that this is the Easter Holidays and Hermione has endured two terms at school, as Head Girl, without “her boys”. On top of that, her NEWTs are approaching. Personally, I think that I could have made her more manic.
Ron, I’m certain, can bring out the best in Hermione. He can make her relax, and his humour is usually teasing and fun. Ron, unlike his friends, would certainly use his fame to his advantage and he’d think that it was a huge joke. The restaurant scene simply flowed from Ron’s attitude, and eventually Hermione gets caught up in the fun. N
You are a freak... just kidding. This was great, I have enoyed everything you have written (that I have read) thus far. Hope you continue to provide interesting takes on the future of the potterverse
Author's Response: Thanks for the review. This was an interesting story to write. Slightly smutty and (hopefully) very Ron! -N-