This was so interesting! I really like your Harry- though it might be a bit ooc for him to become pathetically obsessed with someone to the extent of stalking them, it was hilarious.

And I liked the fact that Draco made Harry wait. It made me laugh :) And the inclusion of religion. For some reason (well, because Malfoy's deeply religious and gay) Malfoy reminded me a lot of Sebastian Flyte from Brideshead Revisited, although Malfoy resolves his conflicts a lot better than Sebastian does. I liked the line about Harry not having to understand it, but to accept it. And the last line was hilarious. And, although I said earlier Harry was slightly ooc, I thought Draco was completely in character. Sorry for my usual incoherence but yes, great story. Alex x

Author's Response: Yeah. Someone had to be OOC. Even if just a fraction! Thanks for reading.

HO MY PRONGS!

- Can you tell I’m stalking your author page? –

This was so brilliant! I was in splits in the beginning because of your sharp wit and unflinching sense of humour. Haha! I loved the dialogue, all of it, and Harry being chastised for ogling at Draco’s derriere was just…fantastic.

The narrative style you’ve used here – the “break-and-make” method as I call it (yes, I am a genius *rolls eyes*), is something I favour. I love reading and writing stories which are written in short scenes, and I think you employed it well here. Your gradual retelling of the post-War life of Harry – the return to Hogwarts, the break-up with Ginny, etc. was very effective. It didn’t sound rushed, but unfolded really well.

I think my favourite character here was Draco, although I also loved Harry – as well as Ron and Hermione. I felt bad for him, but he was so true to his Slytherin self. I must say he handled the pressure of being an ex-Death Eater smoothly (though not without hardship).

Oh, I also loved the whole Religion/Homosexuality debate, and how you incorporated it here. That entire paragraph where Draco confesses stirred my resentment against those who use religion as a means of demonizing homosexuality. It was a heartbreaking speech.

I have a few nitpicks:

"He's dating Astoria Greengrass! I saw them leave the Ministry together yesterday"

"Astoria?" scoffed Hermione. "Greengrass is his friend, Harry. They are mutual acquaintances in France"

"They already do, Ron! I can't sneeze without all of Britain knowing"


All these lines have full-stops missing at the end.

I also think “invisibility cloak” should be “Invisibility Cloak”, though…I wonder if it doesn’t begin with capital letters in the American version?

/Beta Mode

I enjoyed reading this story a lot, Ritta! Great job!

~Natalie.

P.S. Uhm…I Googled DMLE and got Disease Mapping Using Linkage Disequilibrium and Death Metal Legion Erzgebirge as results. Thankfully, they had Department of Magical Law Enforcement, too. Slap me. ><

Author's Response: What a lovely review! XD Thank you my dear. I'll fix those grammatical errors. =] I'm glad you enjoyed my writing style - not a lot of people do, but it's my favorite way to write.

This story hit home for me, and, ironically was published on my birthday :)
So thanks for writing a beautiful piece of work

Author's Response: I'm glad you enjoyed this.