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Reviews For Mistletoe Kisses

Name: Fynnsmom (Signed) · Date: 12/27/14 11:22 · For: Mistletoe Kisses
I think I read this once before but once I realized that I kept on reading. If I liked it before I'll like it again. You captured that awful heartbreaking moment when we realize that we love someone who doesn't love us back.

Author's Response: Thanks. Not on this site, so I wonder where? Lumos, possibly, or some other now-vanished site. This was an important moment for Neville. -N-

Name: ckwright51 (Signed) · Date: 05/11/12 2:36 · For: Mistletoe Kisses
I always got the impression that Neville had a thing for Ginny really enjoyed this one

Author's Response: Some folks don’t like that part of the story. I’m glad I’m not the only one who thought that about Neville. -N-

Name: Shreeja (Signed) · Date: 12/06/11 20:52 · For: Mistletoe Kisses
I am going to have to come up with a better line than "this is nice" because that's all I seem to have to say about your stories. All your characters are in character and each perspective is dealt with so wonderfully that I often forget this is your head canon. To me, this is canon. If JKR is Queen, you're definitely in her Court and part of the elite. :)

Author's Response: Thank you. :-D
This was my first attempt at a Neville story. I hope that I've done him justice.

Name: tagriffy (Signed) · Date: 08/31/11 18:22 · For: Mistletoe Kisses
First, let me say I love your entire cycle of post-DH stories. They are the best I have read, and "Mistletoe Kisses" is one of my favorites. I like it so much because I feel like Neville and Ginny's "romance" not only COULD have happened, but MUST have. All we needed was someone to show us that.

There is a small problem that needs a little work though. Ginny had to ask Neville which bed belonged to Harry, but she should have already known which one was his. After all, she was there the previous school year stealing Tom Riddle's diary back. And it won't do to say that she was under Riddle's influence. She stole the diary back because she had panicked, not because Riddle called to her. Indeed, Riddle was furious with her, which is why he brought her down into the Chamber of Secrets. See Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets chapters 14 and 17.

The problem could potentially be solved by simply cutting out that part of the conversation, unless you have something further planned based on the scene.

Author's Response: Thanks for the review.
Mistletoe Kisses is one of my least read stories, and Im glad that you think Neville and Ginnys Yule Ball date could have happened.
You are, of course quite correct, I had my error pointed out some time ago and I rewrote that section in February of this year. I was convinced that I had submitted the amended version. I havent. I will do that as soon as the queue reopens on Sunday. I hope that you approve of the changes.

Name: dianainga (Signed) · Date: 05/05/11 4:51 · For: Mistletoe Kisses
This is so very sweet. Neville has always been one of my fav characters. Love all your stories and this is so dear. Thank you! Please keep writing!

Author's Response: Thanks for the review. Somewhere on my computer I have a one-shot called "The Professor and his Landlady" I really must finish it. -N-

Name: explodingsnap (Signed) · Date: 03/19/11 19:17 · For: Mistletoe Kisses
That was a reallly sweet story. Most romances only focus on one pairing but I loved how you went through all of the people that Neville has been with. He is such a great character and we rarely get to see his romantic side. I loved it!

Author's Response: This was my first attempt at writing Neville. Hes a great character to write and I really must write more about him. Thanks again. -N-

Name: explodingsnap (Signed) · Date: 03/19/11 19:17 · For: Mistletoe Kisses
That was a reallly sweet story. Most romances only focus on one pairing but I loved how you went through all of the people that Neville has been with. He is such a great character and we rarely get to see his romantic side. I loved it!

Author's Response: Thanks -N-

Name: One Lily (Signed) · Date: 01/29/11 19:50 · For: Mistletoe Kisses
i loved it!!!!

Author's Response: Thanks again :-D -N-

Name: mugglenetaddict813 (Signed) · Date: 01/08/11 8:29 · For: Mistletoe Kisses
What a perfect idea to write a story from Neville's perspective! I love all the flashbacks to Goblet of Fire, especially the part where Neville muses about what is so wrong about being a "nice" boy. I also loved the part where Neville and Ginny kiss under the mistletoe. I think it's a perfect characterization of Ginny because she would definitely kiss Neville to make him feel better and also to spite her brothers too! :) The ending was a great finish to the story because the reader can see how Neville has grown into the hero that he is after the battle and from his many relationships. I loved the reference to the shape of the lips of Neville's past kisses too. It made his kiss with Hannah even sweeter. Overall, it was just a wonderful story! :)

Author's Response:
Thank you.

Im a big fan of the bravest Gryffindor. Belittled, bullied and ignored, Neville never gives up, he always fights for his friends and what he believes and, like Harry he always chooses right over easy.

Both Hermione and Ginny are shown in canon to be very fond of Neville and if I was ever to write a non-canon romance (and this is probably the closest Ill get) Neville would be my choice of leading man for either of those two ladies.

The lips references did not include his kiss with Luna, because despite what others think, Ive never seen Neville/Luna as even an outside possibility. Also, Hannah is really the first girl he kisses, all of the others kissed him.

Name: harrynutter (Signed) · Date: 11/30/10 13:34 · For: Mistletoe Kisses
You are the best. Another person who is not givet the attention they deserve in the written series.

Author's Response: Thank you. If there is one person in the series who deserves a lot more love, it is Neville Longbottom. -N-

Name: TheSmirkingDragon (Signed) · Date: 02/28/10 20:59 · For: Mistletoe Kisses
I really liked this. I think you portrayed Neville very well, though I, myself, never saw Neville as being shy around girls. I suppose in the books we never saw him interacting with any girls other than Hermione, Ginny, and older women, so it’s plausible, but I had never thought that it would have been a problem with him. I hadn’t considered it, and it was really sweet to see his friendship with Ginny, which we never saw in the books.

What bothered me the most about this is the tenses. I was about halfway through, in one of the flashbacks, and I noticed you were in present tense. That seemed pretty odd for a flashback; it would have made more sense to me if you had stayed in present tense during the New Year’s party parts and gone into past tense for the parts going back to his school days.

I really liked the line ‘I leaned between the second and third.’ The first time I read through it, I thought you were referring to his thoughts, and thought he was being quite nice to stand up for her even if he agreed with her, but the second time I read it I got the idea that he was actually leaning between them. I don’t know if you intended it as a double meaning/take, but it came off as that, and I think it was quite clever.

I only found one typo in your piece:

‘and Ginny is my still friend

I think you meant to have my and still in the opposite spots. Besides that, I saw no SPaG errors. Even with a moderated archive, some errors do slip through, and it was nice to read a fic with virtually none.

Your last line was great. It did really well to sum up the entire piece, and brings it full circle from where we began.

This was a really nice piece of writing, and good luck in the challenge!

Author's Response: Neville and his girls:- He is certainly in awe of Gran, and when we meet Augusta its fairly obvious why. I was trying (and possibly failing) to imply several things. Neville is worried by, but familiar with, older and more forceful women (Gran and Professor McGonagall); he is relaxed around girls who he sees as one of the boys, (Hermione); he is worried and anxious about talking to girls he fancies (personally, fear of rejection made a coward out of me on more than one occasion); and he used to be uncertain and shy around giggling girly-girls (which is why I used Lavender). The tenses:- This came about because Ive been experimenting with first person present tense stories ever since I wrote The Mind of Arthur Weasley. You may be right, it simply never occurred to me to write the flashbacks in the past tense, probably because I wrote them first and added the framing scenes afterwards. Leaned, was accidental (perhaps I shouldnt admit it Im not as clever as you thought I was) but on rereading the double meaning made me smile, too. Ill correct the typo (youre right). Thanks for the review and the good wishes. -N-

Name: dominiqueweasley (Signed) · Date: 02/25/10 22:10 · For: Mistletoe Kisses
Awwww. That is so cute. Good job at getting inside Neville's head! This does seem quite like him. :)

Author's Response: In my opinion, Neville is a hero in so many ways. -N-

Name: Equinox Chick (Signed) · Date: 02/24/10 13:55 · For: Mistletoe Kisses
Ahhh, I like this. Sorry, I'm not good at reviews, but this was very enjoyable. I especially liked the kiss between Neville and Ginny, and then the kiss at the end. I'm probably alone in fandom in thinking Neville and Hannah are a lovely couple and I adore the fact that she's a landlady. (But then I like pubs and have worked in one or two)

I thought the three wizards discussing Hannah'a 'ahem' attributes was very funny. Made me LOL - typical men! Nevilles' response was spot on.

Amusing and entertaining. I liked it very much. ~Carole~

Author's Response: Thanks. I agree with you about Neville and Hannah. I keep trying to write Harry/Ginny stories, but Neville and Hannah keep appearing. Being an English male I'm a big fan of pubs. Neville has a sly, self-depreciating sense of humour in my opinion. Neil

Name: hestiajones (Signed) · Date: 02/24/10 12:37 · For: Mistletoe Kisses
Hey, Neil!

I thoroughly enjoyed reading this one-shot. I thought you wrote Neville really well, and you made good use of the first-person narrative to portray his character - the hesitations, the sense of humour, the unadulterated honesty, all of them trademark Longbottom.

Moreover, your approach to the prompt was a pleasant surprise. Instead of telling an exclusive story of his first love (Ginny), you tied that part of his life with his present. The contrast could be seen.

I am also happy that there were no shortcomings on the writing side of things - a very clean read without many punctuation errors, except for one:

Meanwhile, Ginny and her Harpies teammates have joined the fray; Ginny never liked Romilda she made that very clear to me last year.

Perhaps, you could make it:

Meanwhile, Ginny and her Harpies teammates have joined the fray. Ginny never liked Romilda; she made that very clear to me last year.

as the last two parts are independent clauses.

Except for that nitpick, I think the story made a fantastic entry. (Though, I'm sure you were trying to credit Apurva, not Elene, in your End Notes. :p)


Author's Response: Natalie I've had two punctuation errors pointed out to me. I've hastily corrected them both, but I may take yet another look at this. Alas, I was trying to credit Elene (sorry Elene) she betaed this for me. Apurva is providing me with feedback on "Fred and George's Busy Day." So I was half right. No, actually, I was completely wrong. oops. My approach to another of the prompts probably breaks the submission rules. We'll see. Thasnks for the review. Neil

Name: WeasleyMom (Signed) · Date: 02/24/10 10:09 · For: Mistletoe Kisses
Neil, I really love this! I knew it was Neville pretty early on because the characterization was so spot-on. What a great voice you gave him. I loved the memory sections and all his thoughts regarding the different girls and even his reaction to the guys as well.

This is my second favorite story of yours, as nothing could top After Breakfast for me. :)

Good luck with the challenge. I started something for that prompt, but... I'm not the best with deadlines.

Author's Response: Thanks. The summary gave me a lot of trouble (and its only a couple of sentences). How do I pique the readers interest without telling them who the narrator is? I was a little surprised how easy it was to write Neville. I may even get a second challenge story in within the deadline (thanks to some fast and excellent Beta work) but it may not be accepted as I think Ive broken the rules. )-: I find writing to order harder than meeting a deadline. -N-

Name: Calico (Signed) · Date: 02/24/10 9:23 · For: Mistletoe Kisses
This was an adorable story; you really understood the characters and made Neville and Ginny's relationship so believable. I liked the way that you brought all of Neville's love interests into the story, from Ginny to Romilda to Luna, and finally to Hannah. The ending, although predictable, was cute.

Author's Response: Thanks. This is a story of lurve, so predictable and cute is, I suspect, my default setting. -N-

Name: decdraft (Signed) · Date: 02/24/10 8:53 · For: Mistletoe Kisses
sweet story. love how you wrote Neville and Ginny and the Yule Ball. well, actually, love the whole story. you have a really good handle on the canon relationships - love to read all your work

Author's Response: The canon relationships are the ones which fascinate me. Every time I reread the books I seem to spot some new nuance. Thanks. -N-

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