Ronnie, this is a sweety poem and nicely encapsulates what Hermione would have been going through. It flows well and the rhymes aren't forced. Suggestion - write more and from Ron's POV, there's a lot going on between this pair. Lovely poem. ~Carole~
Author's Response: Carole, thank you so much for leaving a review! Hmm, and I might try writing one from Ron's POV. Let's see what I can come up with later. Thanks again! :D -Ronnie Xxx
I may or may not be in school right now. >.<
I love how the first line in every stanza kind of repeats itself. I just love it! It adds to the emotion of the character.
The first stanza is amazing because I really got a feel for how much the person is missing someone. The second stanza is great. The fist line makes me feel for the character. It kinda makes me feel sad. I love how My whole life's a mess fits so well with the line before it. It seems like it wouldn't work, but it does. The last stanza, in my opinion, is the best. I love how the character can't choose if the other person should come back or not. The last two lines in it are just... wow. They make me feel sad for the character.
I love all of the stanzas. They all add something different to the poem. the first one tells me that someone left the character's life. The second shows how much the character misses the person. The third shows how... lost (?) the person is, how sad he is. (I can't think of a better word at the moment.)
But, all of the stanza are so well made that they could go seperetly if you wanted them to. I really want to post all of the lines and tell you what I like about them, but I don't have much time left.
This poem tells so much in so little words. I love it. My word to describe it is, duh duh dun!!:
This poem is just so good that it deserves a wowzers. (And not the bad kind of wowzers.)
You are such a great poet. All of your poems have so much emotion in them. I wish that I could have half of your tallent with emotion. You need to post more here, Ronnie. *hugs*
Author's Response: Alyssa, you made my day. Omfg. Seriously. Thanks so much for the lovely review. Ily! -Ronnie Xxx