aw! hannah's so cute! but i wonder how ron will take it?
oh, dear! man, why did ron have to break it off with hermione? although, long-distance relationships never work.
uhoh.. see! this is what can happen when you have sex before marriage! so, please wait!
Oh My God
I loved your story. At first I hated it because Ron and Hermione were not together anymore and that Miranda girl was such a bitch. But I love the ending. Write another story but this time about Ginny and Harry.
SIMPLY GREAT!!! AM READING IT FOR 2ND TIME!!!!!
Excellent! You understood the feelings of the characters very well!
Great story!!! 7 thumbs up.
I like this chapter. This entire story is great. One of my friends started reading it but didn't get a chance to finish it so she made me raed it to her on the phone.
Oh my gosh! I have to say this is one of my most favourite stories every. It's just so sweet. I absolutly love it. Your a great writer.
"I know I am," Harry said taking a seat next to Hermione quickly, mouthing 'sorry'. Poor Hermione! It's nice to see, though, that Harry hasn't gone off the deep end, gone crazy, or gotten killed, but that he is still a good, dear friend to Hermione.
He had told Miranda all about her. In fact, it had been her who had made him realise long-distance relationships never worked, she had even helped him write the final letter to Hermione, the love of his life … or so he thought. Oh, what an absolute ho! How dare Miranda come into Ron's life and allow him to realize that. It might have been coming anyhow, but Miranda is obviously going to be a witch, and not just one with a wand.
"You … you had a baby."
"Moooooooooo!" Hannah squealed, giggling loudly as she pulled at Buttercups ears. Ha, I love how Hannah breaks this tension! That was hilarious!
"I'm looking at him," Hermione said, staring Ron in the eye, trying not to blink. Oh, gosh, this story just keeps getting better and better--- I can understand why so many people have favorited it. How awful, for the two of them to be put into this situation! Ron had better ditch Miranda or some catfights might go on.
I could just feel Hermione's anguish all throughout this chapter. I would have turned and ran, not stayed and stared at Ron in the face. Looking forward, again, to the next chapter! Great, fantastic work.
It was more passionate, there were more tears, desperation and love between the two Gryffindors that any logical thought had escaped them. I really agree with this. No thought would have been put into thinking about those things, it all would have just been for false worry. What all teenagers think. But I do sympathize with Hermione, great, because she didn't know that this would happen. In this sentence, though, I have a slight nitpick. I think that you meant to add another little something to the end of this sentence, it just kind of runs on and ends without warning. Like, instead of ending it with just It was more passionate, there were more tears, desperation and love between the two Gryffindors so great that any logical thought at that moment had escaped them. It makes it more understandable.
There was so much she wanted to know, and not enough books to help her. Love this. It just adds to the fact, again, that you've decorated Hermione's character so well.
I can't tell him. I just can't. I won't. You've named all of the key points in why Hermione should and should not tell him, explaining very nicely to the reader why she could tell Ron about the baby. Nice work.
You're thousands of miles away from me and relationships are hard enough without that much space between the two people. I think we should take a break from each other for a while, or at least until I return to England. While long distance relationships are sure to never work, this is quite devastating, I know, to Hermione. Maybe she had already known that this was going to happen, but not thought on it too much, only thinking of their last night together. And look at where that had gotten her. Poor thing.
who had thin dark red hair and big blue eyes that strongly suspected would darken to brown over time. There should be a 'we're in between 'that' and 'strongly'.
At the beginning of August, Molly received a letter from Ron, which informed her that he and Harry would be returning home in a few weeks. When she told Hermione the news, Hermione spent those weeks writing and re-writing a speech containing everything she needed to tell Ron, including how she would tell him and a list of questions she figured Ron would ask. What a struggle that would be, to not write to your baby's father, your former lover, your best friend for so long, especially if she knew where he was, what he was doing, and most especially if it's been a year that has gone by since the child has been born! It's a good thing Hermione is so strong. Many couldn't do it, and I'm surprised that Mrs. Weasley contributed to her decision in not telling Ron-- I know that she loves Hermione dearly, but Ron is her son. Wouldn't she want to tell him?
Hermione reached down and lifted Hannah out of her crib and kissing her cheek. In this sentence you either need to omit the 'and' and place a comma before 'kissing' or replace 'kissing' with 'kissed'. Tiny little nitpick I saw.
"I'd like to introduce to you Miranda," Ron said. "She's my girlfriend." Didn't see that one coming! Wow, how awful it would be for Hermione to have to tell her now! I feel just horrid for her. Nice cliff-hanger by the way. If the story wasn't already updated I might have gone crazy.
First off, I know how popular of an author you are, and especially for this story. I was really looking forward to reading this, but never found the time until now. I must say, you drew me in just by your possession of description in just the first few paragraphs. I could just see that banner floating in the wind.
After six children, the seventh appeared without much fuss. I like how you've recreated the memories that even just the backyard holds. It's very bittersweet.
Mrs Weasley’s youngest son Ron, who had turned eighteen in March, was now--along with his best friend Harry Potter--going to America to train to become Aurors. I think that instead of 'became Aurors' you meant to have 'become an Auror'. Because of the length of the sentence, it may have been confused, but once you cut out the thick of it and just have Mrs Weasley’s youngest son Ron, who had turned eighteen in March, was now-[bulk deleted]-going to America to train to become Aurors.
They decided to stay together, both reasoning that a long-distance relationship couldn’t be that hard. I love how both of them are so stubborn; they really want to make the relationship work, I can tell.
“That’s seven-hundred-and-thirty days,” she informed him tonelessly. Just like Hermione. Though we see her so little, I still feel that you have her character developed spot-on. Ron as well, and especially the twins, who continue to crack jokes.
I really admire how you've ended the first chapter with them beginning to make love, then cut to fireworks setting off in the backyard. Just like a love story, to do that.
No one knew the consequences that would change the young lovers’ lives forever. Very chilling. Nice ending--- it leads up to what we think, or know, is going to happen. I look forward to continuing reading.
This is the best fan fiction!!! I LOOVE it!!! I've read it like 50 times!!!!!!!!!!! beautifuly written!!!!!!!
I absolutely LOVED this story. A good story can make you feel the emotions of the characters. I was sooo emotionally drained at times reading parts of this. Great job and a beatiful story. Thanks for writing and sharing.
Not bad :). I like the way you describe things, it all fits very well with Jo's world.
It had taken Hermione a while to fall asleep after that night in the kitchen, not to mention many non-sexual thoughts, such as sour milk, Harry, dentist drills and fried toast.
lol.... harry... brilliant
Oh my! That was so amazing! I wrote a review for another fic saying that it was my favorite ever, but this has definitely surpassed it. The characters were so believable. I love, love, love it!
I love this story tremendously. It was great descriptive and fun filled one
It was an awesome story. Really nice. The best part was Ron's illusion and the letters he sent to Hermione describing the dangers he had to face.