Like Ron, I suppose I would have to be counseled before going to another country. I wouldn't want to be considered "the ugly American." I'll bet that a big difference in being in other countries would be in manners. I haven't been out of the States except for Canada when I was young. I loved that you brought the Cattermoles back into the story. Who can forget Reg and Mary. I'm glad they all got away safely. On to the next story.
Author's Response: Having been to the USA, Canada, and much of Europe, I think that people are, in the main, people. They're usually friendly, and mostly forgiving of the foolish tourist who fails to understand how things work. The Cattermols (or a couple of them) will feature in some of my other stories. -N-
I think if I were Hermione I would want to stay with Ron. Unlike Hermione, however, I've never had to relocate my parents and wipe their memories and find them again. I must not have any pride. I would allow Harry to buy me things. :D I liked that Molly drank fire whiskey with the two young couples. It made her more human--not that she isn't human enough but she's usually kind of strict with Ginny.
Author's Response: Thanks for the comments. Hermione is a very ethical person, and even the "greater good" of changing her parents memories (magically changing their minds!) would, I think, weigh on her. I think that Ginny will allow Harry to buy her stuff, but she needs to curb his generosity. Molly is usually strict, but there are times when she can't be. -N-
Hexworthy is an interesting name. I wouldn't have been able to resist using it either. I think this is the first story I've read that talks about Snape's funeral. Harry seemed surprised that he could smile or laugh at a funeral. I think it's acceptable to laugh because when you do that you're most likely remembering a humorous anecdote about the deceased.
Author's Response: Hexworth is only 40 miles from Ottery St Catchpole (oops, I mean Ottery St Mary), and that made it completely irresistible to me. I agree about laughter, but Harry is young and uncertain about the etiquette. -N-
I don't remember, in the seventh book, if Lavender was mentioned as being injured or killed in the Battle. I know the movie showed Greyback leaning over her. I'm not arguing about it but just trying to remember if that incident was mentioned.
Author's Response: Lavender was last seen being attacked by Greyback. The movie showed her dead, the book didn't. In my opinion she "died" in the movie because Colin Creevey didn't. -N-
Leave it to Ginny to remind Harry of his speech responsibility. I loved the part when Ginny berated George for not following orders and making the DA not follow Kingsley's orders. She's little but she's tough.
Author's Response: Thanks. Little, but tough, sums up my Ginny. I think that, in many ways, Ginny is like Molly (I aslo think that Ginny would be horrified to be compared to her mother). -N-
I think the DA was itching for a fight. Now I'm wondering who the intruders are. This is probably the one time people didn't want to see Kingsley. I think the DA was organized very well and could've taken out the intruders.
Author's Response: I'm sure you're right. Emotions are always high at funerals, but I was uncertain whether this section of the story would work. It appears that it did. -N-
That was interesting! I kind of forgot about Rita Skeeter although you did mention her a while back. Harry finding her, disguised as a beetle, in the grass was pretty funny. Maybe they could capture her in a jar or something.
Author's Response: Thanks. I'm glad you forgot about her, that was the plan. -N-
Luna is so interesting. I think her clothes sound just fine. I don't even know how George is getting by. I can't imagine what it would be like to lose a twin. I love the thought of Luna riding "side saddle." I wouldn't mind seeing something like that.
Author's Response: Luna is doing her best. I'm fairly certain that George isn't getting by, not really. He's burying his grief. -N-
I was afraid that Arthur was going to give Harry "the talk." Poor Hermione! I wonder how she's going to work things out with her parents. I think this is the second story I've read where the author actually gives a more detailed account of Hermione finding her parents. I can imagine that her parents would be displeased with her. If I were her mom I think I could deal with it. I'd be happy to see her again.
Author's Response: Someone had to do it, and Arthur was the only one who could. You'll see in the following chapters how Hermione copes.
I really liked how you wrote Luna. She was amazing! The potion was great. It was what was needed. The Galleon idea was brilliant. Everyone will be able to see Colin--everyone magical that is.
Author's Response: I have to plan when and where I use Luna. This was my first real attempt to write her, and I'm glad you liked it. It took me a long time to find the right "voice" for her. she's a Ravenclaw, she isn't stupid, but she' looks at everything from a very odd perspective.
Come to think of it I've never seen a female pall bearer. That doesn't mean there can't be one. I'm just realizing how much death Harry had to deal with, especially since he had to go around and visit all of the families. I don't think I commented in the chapter that had Umbridge reporting for work shortly after the Battle. I thought hat was so funny. It was like she thought everyone wouldn't notice her if she just came to work like nothing had happened.
Author's Response: Female pallbearers remain unusual, although when I researched this I found one image of what appeared to be the funeral of a suffragette, with six female pallbearers. In my mind Dolores never saw herself as doing anything more than her duty. She worked for Ministers Fudge, Scrimgeour(presumably), and Thicknesse, so why not simply turn up for work as normal, and use the Nuremberg defence?
I suppose it was a shock for the Weasleys to see Ginny and Harry so close together. Why are we always so tense with our in-laws? I was always sure that my mother-in-law disliked me.
Author's Response: In retrospect, I think that Molly and Arthur probably suspected that something was going on. There was a lot of hand-holding going on in the Seven Potters chapter of DH. I was always a little wary of my in-laws, too.
I guess Harry can't give up his responsibilities to the families of the dead and remain hidden so people, like the Weasleys, think he's in Australia. It's odd to me when you say that a male character is nursing a child. In the US that means that a mother is breast feeding her child. Is that a common British term?
Author's Response: Harry, or so it seems to me, is incapable of giving up his responsibilities. As for nursing, it is what nurses do. It means caring for someone, and men can nurse. It can mean breastfeeding, too, but when my wife was breastfeeding, that's what we called it. It appears to be another difference in our shared language.
I guess if people thought Harry was in Australia he could go 'underground' for a while. It will become apparent soon, though, that he didn't go if he's seen at the Ministry.
Author's Response: It will, but Harry will get a few days respite from outside pressures, something which he probably needs.
I like how you disposed of Dumbledore's wand. I didn't like what happened in the movie with Harry breaking the Elder Wand and throwing it into an abyss. I can imagine that Harry would want to be alone right now. He has to sort things out.
Author's Response: Thanks for the reviews. This was the first story I attempted to write. i soon discovered that attempting a novel-length post-battle story as my first wasn't easy, and I interspersed writing it with some practice one-shots. I agree with you about the wand, and I knew I didn't want Ron and Hermione around when he disposed of it. Harry needs to clear his head. -N-
I first delved into fan fiction to read stories about the fall out of the battle. Often writers skip it. Perhaps because it is too sad. Even JKR herself left it all and jumped 19 years into the future.
I loved this story. It was realistic and felt like a continuation of the book.
This story is what made me love you as an author. It had everything. The proper amount of angst, humour, fluff and action. I cried during the funerals. Fan fiction is never that good.
My only complaint is how it ended. The postscripts were cute snippets at their lives in the next few months, but I disliked the whole concept because so much of what was mentioned could have been their own one shots or chapters of a story. I for one would love to read about Ron and Harry’s first days training, or about Hermione and her parents being visited by Kingsley or about Ginny helping George while dealing with the sudden fame of being the Chosen One’s Chosen One. Perhaps one day when you get more time you could actually write those scenes.
Like you, I first delved into fan fiction to read stories about the fall out of the battle, and like you, I discovered that writers often skip it. The ones I’ve tried to read (even, recently, on this site) concentrate on romantic angst and don’t mention the rebuilding. I started writing this because I couldn’t find a post-battle story I liked.
I tried my best tto make this a continuation of the book. I read and reread JKR’s interviews and tried to make sense of what she saw happening to her characters.
When I originally planned this story I intended to end it with the funerals. I thought that it needed a postscript, a happy ever after. To be honest, at the time I didn’t think that I’d still be writing the same storyline. It wasn’t until I started aurors and Schoolgirls that I realised I needed a master plan. You are correct, there is a lot I could write about (and you’ve mentioned several things I’ve considered), but I’m trying to finish at least one of my chaptered stories. Perhaps one day.
ps This is review 100! Thanks for that. :-D
I accidentally read this story again yesterday. (I do that.) Your writing has improved since this early story, but I still like it for things that have been strong throughout -- the characterization and attention to detail.
This morning I was scrabbling around my nightstand for my glasses and I remembered this chapter and how Harry did the same thing -- of course he did!
And, while it doesn't relate to this chapter specifically, I was on the bus yesterday and the thought came to mind, "People who don't like Ginny in the real books would not like this Ginny."
(actually, that portion of the review should probably go with A&S, which I was also accidentally reading yesterday.)
Anyway, I admire your work. I'll try to leave more reviews so that you know.
I think I know what you mean by "accidentally" reading something. I sometimes click on a story, or pick up a book, not intending to read it, but I end up getting sucked in. I keep looking at this story , spotting errors and thinking, I must fix that... Perhaps one day i will.
My Ginny is, I hope as close to canon as I can make her. I've honestly never understood the Ginny-haters, even by the end of CoS it's obvious that she's strong and self reliant.
There are a few times when it's the reviews which keep me writing, or at least, push me into writing more quickly.
I always thought that Hagrid might have been close to the Creevey brothers, I was under the impression Denis rather admired him after the ordeal before the sorting ceremony in book four. I would have guessed at his attendance to Collins funeral.
I suspect that like you said earlier inexperience or it never having occurred to you might might played a part in his absence. There really seemed to be little flaw in this and is quite good if it is your first work.
Author's Response: Ellorah
I will admit to ignoring Hagrid in all of my stories. It’s an oversight which I really must try to remedy.The fact that the first story I chose to write was novel-length probably says more about my inexperience as a writer than anything else. My many betas (especially the ones for this story) deserve a huge thank you.
In the 6th paragraph from the end, the first sentence might have a typo you did not notice, "anyone about else about the Horcruxes ". Other wise I like it very much. Though, and I might be late in saying this but, this plot seems to have rush forward, a bit, in the middle. It is only my opinion and I am sure you had a reason.
Author's Response: Ellorah
Thanks for letting me know. I’ll fix the typo. It took me two reads of your review to spot it! This was the first fanfic I started, and you’re probably right about the pacing, it certainly rushed towards the conclusion. Chalk it up to inexperience (although I’m probably still making the same mistakes). I keep meaning to take another look at this story.-N-
Charlie and perfect Percy exchanging wicked grins in anticipation of looking after George? What is this world coming too? And "Arthur, will you put down that plug?" heh heh! I understand Mr. Granger's point, but he is being way too harsh.
Author's Response: One brother with a hangover, two without. Wicked grins are the only option. Mr Gragnger is, I hope, understandably angry. -N-