That is such a moving story. I love how Helena wants nothing more than to be alive again. I enjoyed it.
Author's Response: Thank you very much for reading this story and I'm glad you enjoyed it. I loved writing Helena and the tragedy behind never being able to live again. Thanks again! :)
Before I even read the story, I wanted to say that this idea was extremely unique and appealing to me - I've never read a POV of a ghost, and certainly not a romance. Needless to say, I was intrigued.
I think this summed how the…realism?...of the possibility of this being a "missing moment" type:
"There was a curse to being a ghost. You lived a half-life, still in form of your living self but without any of the pleasures that life provided. Given, you still had desires for such things but none of it could be fulfilled."
I think much of this gets forgotten, though we know, for example, that Nick remembers and desires eating at dinner. The other desires, however, can still be there and powerful.
I thought most of your characterization of Helena was really wonderful; the first few paragraphs describing her emotions as she watches the students and her reactions and how she felt about the Baron were some what self-pitying and haughty without sounding overdone. I don’t know if a person (or ghost :]) would describe themselves as she did when she talks about why the students avoid her:
"I preferred to keep to myself, wallowing in my own self-pity."
It would seem like she would describe her isolation as self-induced because of the painful reminders and the pettiness that she rose above, but then describing the Baron as someone who wallowed in his own self-pity. Which then, of course, the reader sees that she is being somewhat self-delusional. Does that make sense?
Ah, politics between the ghosts! In addition, there isn't much dialogue between the ghosts in the books, but I thought you pulled it off wonderfully; I particularly like the scene between Helena and the Fat Friar. It allows us to their relationship and more of their characterization, as well as setting the scene for the party. A scene should do multiple things, yes? :)
The scene between Helena and Nicholas was quite sweet and old-fashioned, and I thought the ending rounded it out nicely. The nostalgia felt…real. (I'm using that word again! How weird to use the word real to describe a romantic scene between ghosts!) I guess what I mean to say is, when you realize something you want can never be, you become reflective about your life and how you've lived it. And the scene with the Fat Friar at the end was nice closure.
Overall, it was a really nice story!
Author's Response: Thank you so much for the response! It made me smile. I must say that I quite love writing Helena because she is so proud, but she always seems really bitter about her own death. I say that the students avoid her, because of her attitude, and she's pities herself for being dead, as she believes the Baron should pity her for killing her in the first place. As for the Friar and Helena, I love their relationship; I always had imagined him to make quite a bit of jokes. Thank you about the ending. That happens to be my favorite part, the part with just Nicholas and Helena; even I felt a little sad writing about it, how they could never, ever be together. Thank you again for reading this and I'm glad you liked it. I loved writing it, and it was good to hear such a thorough response. :)
This was so beautifully written. You conveyed Helena's feelings and longings perfectly. It was sad that Nicholas and Helena can never be together, can never show their love for each other. This was one of my favorites. Well done, mzap. :)
Author's Response: Thank you so much. :) I'm glad you liked it and this is also one of my favorites. Maybe I'll decide to work with the pairing again sometime. Thanks again for reading.
Every one of these conversations would
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwww....this is so sweet, albeit depressing.
lead him into apologizing for his decision of killing me, for which I would swiftly remind him that he truly wasn’t.
truly wasn't? Aplogizing?
This story is excellent. Great Job. :-)
Author's Response: Thanks so much for reading and responding! I expected this to be a happier fic, but towards the end it took a sadder turn. I still love it all the same. Thanks again! I'll be sure to fix that now.