Perfect! This is an awesome mixture of found poetry and original poetry! I'm wondering if we are allowed to submit entirely found poetry? Meaning, using only phrases found not quite at random from the books and placing them in such a way to make a lyrical piece. Hmm...
Anyways, I loved it! I can see why it won!
Author's Response: Thanks! I'm not sure if you would be allowed to submit a fully fledged found poetry poem as there may be restrictions. You could definitely ask one of the archive mods. There is an archive question thread in PA or you could just post in Ask a Mod. Again, thanks for the review :)
This is such a simple poem, Julia, and yet it conveys so much. Of course, it helps that you've used such a powerful scene from the book and you've interspersed your stanza's with JKR's words, but the tie her words bring to your poem and vice versa, make this a very emotive poem.
I think the most successful stanza here is the fourth one because when he mentions the word 'Loved', it ties in very well with not only the recurring theme of the series, but at that particular moment with Narcissa. She is terrified for Draco, so that's why she lies and defies Voldemort. Love saved Harry so many times.
Author's Response: Thanks, Carole! That moment in the book is just so intense that it lends itself to poetry very well. There is so much emotion in there. It's good to see that the simplicity of the poem still manages to convey that emotion. I like that you picked up on the 'loved' stanza. We all know how love is a crucial part of the series in terms of the immediate plot and characters, but I love the depth to which JKR goes to instill the importance of love in all parts of the narrative. As you said, love saved Harry so many times. That would be an interesting point of discussion in the SBBC... Again, thanks for the review and I am very excited to see what inspiration you take from it :D
I am not into poetry as you well know, so I'm steppping out of my comfort zone here: I try neither to read nor write it. I hate it because it's usually just a spill of works.
You have a style and a flow to the poetry that you usually don't see with inexperienced authors in the brig. It follows a rhythm and sticks to it. You know we'll discuss this further.
The repetition of the phrase 'I am alive woven in after every stanza is simply well done. Okay, well, if you want want my true opinion, it's a bit oerdone, but the adjectives show you have skill, and you're not simply attacking fluff along the way.
Are these passages randomly picked out, for they seem to follow along with the book, but I'm not exactly comparing text-to-poem and have no book in front of me. I'll discuss this futher.
My one nit pick here is these final two lines: the reoetition does not workk here as much as it did the other times. Perhaps just saying "Yes, I am Alive" would have left a stronger impression.
Author's Response: Thanks for the review, Kuri! The reason the 'I Am Alive' is repeated is because I wanted it to feel like a heartbeat. The passages weren't randomly picked out - they do follow along with the book. I had inspiration for the poem as I was reading that chapter so, naturally, I did want it to follow that order. As for the final lines, I wanted it to be more of an affirmation of life for Harry so that is why I did repeat it. I like to read my poetry allowed as I write and that sounded more final rather than just ending with one line. But thanks so much for the feedback! Especially since you were stepping out of your comfort zone :) Julia XD
Fantastic poem! Congrats on winning the QSQ! I love how you've written something so affirming interspersed with something rather dark from the book. Great connection and interplay. Love your word choice, all perfect for what Harry must have felt then. Great job! ~Gina :)
Author's Response: Oh Gina thank you! I forgot to reply to this review. Sorry! I still grin like a mad woman every time I think about the QSQ. It was such a lovely surprise! Thanks for reading and reviewing.
Argh, I freaking fail, dude!
I read this one ages ago, and like the - insert-a-word - I am, I didn't review. At least I'm pretty sure I didn't.
For the most part, throughout most of school, I hated poetry, and it hated me right back. I just couldn't wrap my brain around all of these hidden themes and agendas from the author, which made reading it painful and annoying. Now that I don't have to read it, I find myself enjoying it much more.
This one typically goes against my reading process, which is basically a variation of in one ear and out the other. I forget stuff as soon as I read it. But this one...I remember this one well, because it was as if it was Harry's brain rebooting itself, making the tentative reconnection to life, both spiritual and biological, and that kicks ass (yeah...that was friggin eloquent, eh?).
Anyway, I love this poem, and I'll probably read it again in six months, just so I never forget it.
b29; - Jess
Author's Response: Aw, Jess! Thanks so much! I was rather surprised when it came up that I had another review for this poem since I wrote it quite a while ago! I'm so glad that you find this memorable. I just love to recite this in my head at times because I find it so calming, like it brings me back to where I feel I should be. Which was the entire point when I wrote it and as you said, it's Harry's brain rebooting itself. I love the way you put that. Again, thanks so much for the review! Julia
Author's Response: Thanks for reading.
Oh. Well, this is a quite well writen poem. It really speaks to a person. I think we can all relate to somthing like this.
Author's Response: Thank you for the review! I'm glad it spoke to you.
Wow, just wow.
What a great poem, a totally deserving winner :D
Author's Response: Thank you! I'm still 'squeeing' at winning the award!
What a poem! I absolutely love the balance and contrast that you’ve used between your poetry and the lines quoted from Deathly Hallows. The bits of your poetry are short bursts, just like those rapid-fire thoughts that Harry must have had at those moments. It works so well, and I, as the reader, feel like it just adds even more to that scene in the book, because in real life we do have those fleeting, immediate half-thoughts that run right alongside our more coherent thoughts.
And the word choice is wonderful, very telling, hitting those emotions that would have to be coursing through Harry in that scene. The rhythm is so well constructed, too. Words, and then these short, but more firm thoughts. And the repetition of ‘I am alive’ comes across almost as a heartbeat. Fabulous work!
Author's Response: Thankyou so much! That scene is so intense and really speaks to me. I remember the first time reading it (I was crying a lot being incredibly tired and sad that it was all coming to an end and having done nothing but read Harry Potter for about 12 hours since it's release...) and just feeling this overwhelming relief that Harry was alive, yet terror for Harry having to go back to this dangerous place and then sadness for the grief he must now face in light of all the death he has seen and feels responsible for... so many emotions that I felt as a reader just translated so well into a poem. You're right how the repetition sounds like a heartbeat. That was my intention! So thankyou for reading and reviewing. You have made my day :)
This poem is short, yet so profound in meaning that I fell in love with it. In so few words, you bring about a really vast meaning to the simple act of 'being alive', and what it meant to Harry at that point of time.
The first stanza, in particular, drew me in. It was powerful, and unlike the other stanzas which conveyed Harry's feelings, it simply put forth the practicality of the situation; the realisation that he was back to his body. But it also conveyed to me that he was back with a renewed strength and vigour to fight, and sets a positive tone to the whole poem. Wonderful.
We can see Harry's conviction in the second stanza too, his vigour to fight, now having realised his goal and willing and ready to achieve it. I particularly liked the contrast between what we see in this stanza and what we see in the next. There he suddenly begins to doubt after a gust of confidence. He is afraid. :)
I loved the fourth stanza. Maybe it was because it tied in so beautifully with the lines from DH quoted right above it. To me, it connects to the confusion in Harry's mind, when Narcissa lies to keep him alive. That's why I found 'lost' extremely meaningful there, and how, even literally, he was waiting to be taken away from the forest(which is dark), and into the light.
The last couplet was filled with the emotion of triumph. It almost radiates joy, and I loved how it ended with that. It is a recognition of his appreciating that, despite all odds, Harry was alive, and at that moment, just, in itself, is a huge triumph-- for him, as well as for the wizarding world. When I view it from another angle, it also implies that despite all the insecurity, fear and confusion that reigned in his mind, which is conveyed in the stanzas prior to this, Harry acknowledged the fact that he was alive and the simplicity of the act stands out against the complex emotions that he feels. Truly, it was a beautiful ending.
Author's Response: Thankyou. I am amazed at how well this has been received. Poetry is such a personal form of writing, it is often hard to know how someone else will receive it. I always read that part of DH over and over and often thought how terrifying yet exhilirating it must have been for Harry to wake like that, still shrouded in darkness yet with a renewed sense of hope and vigour. It is such a pivotal moment and the poem just poured out of me. So thankyou for your great (and perceptive) review. I'm touched that the message is getting through.
For the first stanza alone, this poem is worthy of any anthology. What a fantastic affirmation of life. I may well print out that first stanza and stick it to my backboard at work to remind me that I am alive!! To be able to write something profound with so few words is a gift, my friend. I hope to see more of your poems in the queue! (and you could take out those Potter quotes and this would stand alone as a great piece of work)
Author's Response: Wow thankyou. I've been writing poetry for years but I've never let anyone read them before, and this was my first attempt at Potter poetry so it was quite scary for me to submit. So thankyou for your encouragement, it has made my day :)