Wow! I think what would have made this even better was if those last three words were inverted to say, Empty. Hard. Cold. I think it would have wrapped this poem up much better, because it would start with the word cold, and then ends with the same word. Other than that, I think it was great!
Author's Response: Thanks so much. That's actually a really good idea.
This was a very nice poem. it wa the title that drew me in... when there are poems or even stories about Lily most of them talk about her eyes, and so I though this was interesting. Nice work.
Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it.
i really liked this poem
Author's Response: Thank you!
What a lovely poem.. I like the emphasis of the words old, hard, and empty.. They make very fitting ending and beginning statements... Good job : )
Author's Response: Thanks so much! That was actually my favorite part, as well.