yes yes yes write more!!!! you're a wonderful writer!!!
Yep!! This story seriously has to go on forever and ever~~
I really liked this story. I thought it was an interesting and unique take on the Rose/Scorpius romance, and I thought you told it well. One criticism I have, just from a grammar standpoint, is that relative pronouns (like "who," "which," "that") should follow as often as possible the object to which they refer; e.g. "the Hufflepuff's parents, who" instead of "the parents of the Hufflepuff, who." Though the context allows the reader to understand, this would clear things up a bit and usually a pretty simple fix.
It would be great to read more of this, should you choose to write it.
Lovely story...I love a good make-up after a spectacular break-up!
Oh, by all means, write more, because Rose and Scorpius have so many deliciously ridiculous potential problems and pitfalls that would definitely make for good literary fodder. They're almost as unlikely/perfect as Hermione and Ron.
Yer, u gotta write more. Great story.
Scorpius’ possibilities have always highly intrigued me, as he’s Draco’s only canon child, and I think that with this one-shot, you’ve taken all the possibilities of his character and made him into such a tangible one to read. He just feels very real, and because we don’t see really anything of him in the Epilogue, I think that’s a remarkable feat.
Your characterization of Scorpius leaves the reader wanting to know more about him, and his relationship with Rose, for that matter. I thought he was wonderfully stubborn, in a prideful way that was very Draco-eque. It reminded me of how stubbornly Draco stuck to his mission from the Dark Lord despite all the problems he faced. And you show briefly that Scorpius has perhaps suffered from losing Rose before out of stubbornness, so I thought it was a good character trait for him.
‘Shocking,’ Scorpius muttered, feigning indifference, ‘considering the whole year was invited.’
I think this was the point where I truly new that you had a wonderful handle upon Scorpius’ character. He was just so Malfoy with this line, and it truly gave way to his parentage, in its sarcasm and indifference. Throughout the entire story, you keep Scorpius consistent and believable.
Now Rose, we don’t see much of the young woman she is in this, but despite that, you get the feel that she is a real person, a real teenage girl that is just coming of age. Her honesty with Scorpius as a defense mechanism was so wonderful. I could really just imagine what was going on inside her head – trying to keep her cool and not let him know how much he was affecting her – it must have been difficult, and to remain honest and confident in those moments was wonderful. I also liked how once the walls had been broken down on both sides, Rose felt so real. At that moment, I could feel her shift from being seemingly real to existing in the story.
She shook her head, staring at him with hints of intent in her brown eyes. ‘I’m saying that, for nearly a year, I’ve been keeping the seat beside me unoccupied in the hope that you might take it, and the moment I allow it to someone else, something drags her away.’ She stared at him as if she expected him to understand. ‘I’m saying that perhaps I should have let someone take your seat long ago, Scorpius.’
This was the one instance where I could really see her parents in her, and see your characterization of her beyond the scope of this story. You can feel the intelligence that comes off her, and through that, her mother in her. But it was also wistful, and I thought it as a very good touch, a lovely passage.
I think perhaps one of my favorite things about this story was Daniel, though. He was just seriously adorable, and I always love nice Slytherins who having remaining Slytherin qualities. It was so nice to see in this story that not all of them are the same, and I think Daniel was a perfect picture of that. The way he disagreed with Scorpius’ dislike of being a ‘nice Slytherin’ was very interesting, and I’d love to see more about his character. Perhaps you’ll write more of him in the future?
Another thing that really stood out to me in a lovely way was your descriptions. They were believable, and never grew repetitive or dull; they remained varied, vivid and refreshing. Like this line: “Pushing aside the urge to roll his eyes, he began to inconspicuously scan the cards of each elaborately wrapped present, hoping to find one from a name he recognised.” I really loved the word choice in this sentence and the way that it flows. And the imagery throughout the story was lovely to read.
Scorpius took his wand out of his pocket and quietly said, ‘Accio quill.’ He then held out his hand expectantly and felt the cool, thin touch of the quill arriving. Leaning down over the box, he quickly added ‘and Scorpius’ to the bottom of the card.
Going along with descriptions, you placed magic in this story exceedingly well. I find often that authors use magic just to remind the reader that the story is in the Potterverse, but you didn’t do that. The magic with Scorpius felt natural and effortless, just as it should.
This story has so many wonderful little touches – like the small bits of humour between Daniel and Scorpius, the touches of magic, the emotional shifts Rose and Scorpius experience, the ease with which it flows – and it really all just left me wanting more, much more. I do hope you will continue with this story, as I know that I must continue to ravish through your author’s page. You have a gift for detail, Cassie, and it is wondrous to read.
I really like this story, you have no idea how i felt when i realized that you wrote a follow-up one-shot on Reluctant Love, i was soooo sad because of how that one ended, and how he lost everything, he lost his Rose and his best friend, Lily... =( but the way you changed that in this story is awesome! =]
Author's Response: Oh, thank you! I'm glad you found the follow up :) I did leave things a bit cruelly, didn't I? Thanks for reading and reviewing! I appreciate it. - Cassie
‘Reluctant Love’ was awesome, so I had to read this. And it rocks. I love that it fills in the time-gap with a few details, but it leaves the rest to your imagination. Plus there was no Lily in this one, so she couldn’t complicate anything xD
The beginning was great. The way you mentioned no names - I like that. It kept me there, wanting to find out who these people were.
The mention of this Hufflepuff obsessed with inter-house unity. Lol. I get the impression Scorpius and him don’t quite see eye-to-eye, but I don’t think Scorpius totally disagrees with the unity thing either. He’s there at the party for one, and he gets on with Rose (by the end), and he used to be friends with Lily too, though you don’t tell us whether he still is. But then it doesn’t really matter.
They remained entwined until their lips had almost bruised and the sounds from above were impossible to ignore.
Love the imagery there. The word ‘bruised’ made me stop and wince. Heehee. I also liked the description of Rose when Scorpius first sees her. That was well handled - I could very much imagine the scene.
As he strolled along the room - ‘along’ doesn’t seem like the right word.
Accio quill - you don’t mention anything about ink, and a quill kind of depends on that :)
Anyways, good work. And I would read more if you wrote it -- I love the characters you’ve woven. xx
Author's Response: I didn't think about the ink thing... ugh. lol. I'll fix 'along', it should be 'through' I suppose. Thanks for such a lovely review! I think he and Lily would have gotten over their problems, actually. She never liked him as much as Rose did. ~ Casie
i really loved this. you are an amazing writer, it seems that every time i read an emotio-evoking story and i look to see the author, its you! you are most definitely going on my favorite authors list. i would love to read more about Rose and Scorpius, they are a favorite ship of mine.
Author's Response: Aw, wow. Thanks so much for your kind review. I'm sure to write more :) ~ Cassie
I like this story. I like it a lot. You have managed to convey so much longing from both of them. It had me, the reader, urging them to kiss far sooner than they actually did. You held the tension and interest superbly.
I like Daniel, too. He seems fun. I guess I should scoot over and read the other story in the hope he's in that. I like the interplay between him and Scorpius.
I do have a small nit pick, and it's purely a personal one.
‘You’ve got to understand how confronting it is for me,' . I'm not sure about the word 'confronting'. It doesn't seem to make sense but then I do understand what you're saying; I just don't think 'confronting' is an adjective. 'Confrontational' perhaps?
Great one-shot and you should definately write more of this. They're a nicely totured pair and the Ron/Draco dynamic will be amazing in your hands.
Author's Response: Aw thanks, Carole. Unfortunately, I didn't think of Daniel until this one shot. I would have liked to have had him in Reluctant Love, but oh well. You have a point about 'confronting'. I'll have a think about it. :) You're right, it would be good to involve Ron and Draco somewhere along the line. Thanks for the review! ~ Cassie
Seems like a perfect moment to me...now I have to find the other story...sigh!
Author's Response: Aw, thank you! Good luck with finding another story :P ~ Cassie
Wow. Just ... wow. That was absolutely breathtaking, seriously.
It was such a drastic change from Reluctant Love - definitely not what I was expecting. But I think I liked it even more than RL. :D I was expecting it to be somewhat of an immediate follow-up, with what happened after the incident at the end of chapter three. In all honestly, I had expected Rose and Scorpius to get back together. Not stay away from each other for a year. >.<
The beginning of this was just wonderful – so mysterious. I love how you’ve made this fic work so well as a stand-alone as well as a companion piece. The start draws you in immediately, regardless of whether or not you know the back story.
The scene with Daniel and Scorpius inside was just adorable, as well, and I kind of wish Daniel had been in RL. He’s quite a lovely little character. Their little conversation about being the only two nice Slytherins was great as well – Daniel wanting to be labelled nice and Scorpius not. :D Also, on a little side note, when you called them men I gave a little sigh. It was a nice touch. Scorpius really has grown up from Hogwarts.
I love Scorpius’ presence, how he can seem so sure of himself, when inside he’s just wondering what the hell he’s doing. You’ve characterised him very well, and he seems much like the Scorpius I loved from RL, except a bit older and wiser and … more guarded, which ties in very well with his feelings now about Rose.
It’s interesting that you don’t mention Rose for the first part of the fic. A very nice touch. Even though Scorpius isn’t thinking or talking about her, you can just feel her presence on the edge of his thoughts. She’s there, even when she’s not, if you understand me. ^_^
Your writing … guh. Seriously, Cass. It’s beautiful. Another drastic change from RL. The styles you’ve written them in are extremely different – RL was very dialogue-centric, relying on action, but this was amazingly descriptive and just beautiful. You’ve really revealed your true writing skills in this, dear. ;) Brilliant. I could copy and paste a hundred lines that I thought were absolutely gorgeous, because I honestly loved them all. Your writing is so beautiful. You portray emotions and feelings so realistically.
The only thing I would have liked to see more of is character description – with the year that’s elapsed since we’ve last seen these two, a little physical description of them would have been nice. It helps the reader to visualise the characters, and it would have worked wonderfully with Scorpius’ reaction to seeing her again.
I loved Rose, as usual. Her mysterious (perhaps slightly drunken?) talk about fate and life without Scorpius was so perfect. Maybe a bit profound for their first re-meeting, but then again, it is Rose. :)
It struck Scorpius that perhaps the owner of this home had quite a lot of friends, perhaps a lot more than he himself had.
This line is probably my favourite. :D One, because it’s really funny, and two, because it really shows a lot about Scorpius. I love that he’s just had this little realisation that being spiteful towards people really isn’t getting him anywhere in life, and it’s certainly not winning him any friends.
‘I’m never confident,’ she said. ‘Not when I’m with you.’
Wistful sigh. That was so sweet. I loved how it just managed to break down ever barrier Scorpius had put up to stop himself falling for her again. :) And then the ending … definitely my favourite part of the whole fic. It was just so romantic. He can’t live without her. Aww.
Um, I completely agree with you when you say you should write more. Dude, I’m in love with this pairing, especially how you write them. I’m your number one fangirl! Write more for me, at least. :P (And I’m totally flattered that you mentioned me in the chapter note. ^_^)
Author's Response: JEN. You have no idea how big my smile was through this whole review. I fangirl your reviews! I know, my writing has changed a lot since that first chapter of Reluctant Love. I definitely do not rely on dialogue these days. In fact, I avoid it. lol. I like Daniel, too. I wish there could be more of him. Perhaps if I do more Rose/Scorpius, he'll be there. He's a good friend for Scorpius. More grounded, I think. I'm really glad you liked the ending, too. I was worried about how well I did it. I'm sososo glad you liked it, dear. I'm inspired to write more now. lol. Thank you for such a wonderful review. ~ Cass x
Absolutely brilliant! Your characterisation of Rose is beautiful (I can't say accurate because what is accurate?) and I enjoyed it a lot, especially the line about her posture (can't say why, perhaps because I believe it would be something an upstanding young man like Scorpius would notice). You write the tension between the two in a very lovely manner, capturing that trembling insecurity of embarking upon love's paths. I've never read Reluctant Love, but I absolutely will have to now. Your writing style is too pleasing not to want to read more of. Great piece. It doesn't exactly scream for continuation (and by that I mean that it doesn't seem too incomplete), but I wouldn't object to a continuation. It seems almost like an ending to an antecedent relationship that the reader must assume themselves.
Author's Response: What a lovely review. Thank you! My writing style has changed a lot since Reluctant Love, but hopefully you'll enjoy that as well :) I'm really glad you liked it. ~ Cassie
I really liked this story. It was very well written and the characterization and description was great. A lot of the romance stories are cliched but yours is sweet and hopeful and beautiful. I can't wait to read more since I haven't read Reluctant Love, but I'll get on that right away. Way to go!
Author's Response: I'm glad you enjoyed it :) Thanks for such a nice review. I hope you like Reluctant Love! ~ Cassie
Nice story. It is complete. If you decide to write more my guess is you'd have to go back and start during their years at Hogwarts, or do a lot of flashbacks. I always want to what happened before a story starts, and what happens after it ends.
Author's Response: Thanks :) Well, I've already written about their time at Hogwarts in Reluctant Love, but I might do something about the future. We'll see. Thanks for the review! ~ Cassie