Reviewer: saveginny417
Date: 12/23/08 22:28
Chapter: Chapter 1

Aw. Well. I just read that entire thing with the most gigantic smile on my face. As Haley would say, THAT WAS ADORABLE! Now time for my nitpicks and random comments, because I’ve had too much sugar, it‘s 10:53 PM, and potatoes come from Ireland.

“That was weird.” “That was Jordan.” hehehe. I love that kid, honest to god. He. Is. The BEST. I don’t remember what I decided that stood for. It was like Brightest Telepathinc… yeah.

“He was wearing these amazing shoes.” possibly the best reason I have ever heard to go out with anyone EVER.

Oh, Tyrone Thomas, the Latin Lover! I don’t know why, but this reminded me irresistibly of one time on The Office, which is the best show ever (mostly because all of the actors are COMPLETELY and UTTERLY ADORABLE, except the psychopathic ones), this one guy had a crush on the accountant and really wanted to go out with her, so he called his friends from his a cappella group and they sang “Take a Chance on Me” by ABBA to her over speakerphone. It was great. Slightly embarrassing, but fabulous. I clearly watch way too much television.

I hate to say this, but I have Spanish OCD, and so I’m gonna nitpick, if you don’t mind. “si señor” should be “sí”, with an accent acute, and “ME AMO” translates to “I LOVE MYSELF.” I know Tyrone probably had no idea what he’s saying, but the reflexive is wrong and that really, really bugs me. It should be “te amo” (I love you) or “te quiero” (I love you, but in a slightly more sexual and desirous way). And Arrivederci is very much Italian. So good call, Jordy.

Oh, I see Tyrone has discovered The Princess Bride by now. He’s all high-and-mighty Westlyish SEXY-UPON-AWESOME and I totally love it. I WILL GO TO THE BALL WITH YOU, TYRONE. FORGET HERRRR. And that song is totally from Shakespeare. Or Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Gene Wilder totally sings it while he’s riding that weird bike in the invention room. Yes.

Oh, YAY! TYREMMAAAAAAA.

And that basically sums up my reaction to the rest of the story.

Except the Jordan thing. That kid is honestly the… I CAN’T THINK OF ENOUGH ADJECTIVES. You are brilliant, and adorable, and ahhhgherrrgggg… man. I just trailed off into onomatopoeia, so. You know it’s gotta be good. Squishes.

I had another Spanish nitpick though… ah, yes! It should be buenAS noches, not buenOS. La noche is a feminine noun, so the adjective has to be feminine as well. I don’t know why I don’t have issues when people mess up English grammar, since that IS my first language, but… Spanish is easier. The Babel Fish just isn’t grammatically correct. Pleh. Sorry to rant about that. I’m done now, I promise.

TRANSITION ALERT…this is me going back to ranting about how awesome you are…

So, pretty much, this was the best present I got all night. (I’m Jewish, by the way, so I got to open mine early.) between the three iTunes gift cards and my aunt’s idea of a good present, this was the greatest. [once I actually found the present, it was great, but beforehand not so much. It was a rather large shoebox filled with shredded newspaper and a CODED MESSAGE that took me half an hour to figure out, which said that my real present was hidden in the box. So then my uncle made me go through every single piece of shredded newspaper before I hit the bottom, and then rip off the paper, since they’d wrapped the INSIDE of the box, and finally after about another half hour I found thirty dollars crammed into the cracks where the manufacturers folded the box into a rectangle. It was an ordeal.] this was better. There was TYREMMA. And JORdAN, whom I love very, very much.

Excellent, excellent, excellent, and have a fantastic holiday season!

~Juli

By the way, I know I haven’t gotten around to that last chapter of the Past yet. I was going to review, I was! But then the system got screwed up and my internet crashed and I got distracted by AP history. I’ll get to it over holiday, yes? Goody. XD

Author's Response: Oh my gosh, Juli! I always look forward to your LOOONG reviews. Now, disclaimer-- I speak no Spanish, and I purposely didn't correct my mistakes because no one in this story speaks Spanish, either. I love Jordan, too, hehehe.... Oh, by the way, the shoes? Yeah, I became really good friends with this dude after going up to him and saying, "I don't know you, but I love your shoes." So I thought Haley would go a step further and ask OUT a dude for that reason.

I like basically never watch TV, but that Office thing sounds so fun and hilarious. It reminds me of the movie "Ten Things I Hate About You," where Heath Ledger is singing and leading the marching band... and an actual guy who dressed up in a suit of armor and had a guy come out and yell, "Presenting, Prince Erik!" In the middle of my chorus class.

I will definitely change "Me amo" to "te amo" (which is actually what I meant to write in the first place), but I can't do anything about the accent symbols and extra upside down question marks and exclamation points. They just don't work on my computer for some reason. It's a bit stone age!

Yes, Princess Bride indeed! (There's some Princess Bride in his costume as the Latin Lover, as well.) I wrote Tyrone's song as a terrible quasi-Shakespearean diddy, but it DOES remind me of the bicycling song Willy Wonka sings! I am SOOO glad that you like the Jordan-ness... it was definitely fun to write.

I didn't use Babel Fish for the Spanish (I know how terrible BabelFish is after translating an email I wrote to my friend into German with Babelfish and back into English, and it was total nonsense)-- I just used my very minimal (nonexistent) Spanish. I would've definitely done research if the characters actually knew anything about Spanish, but I guess I was lazy here because Tyrone was supposed to be clueless.

Wow, I'm hoping for three iTunes gift cards! There are a million songs I want to buy-- I only get gift cards at Christmas and my birthday (which is in April) and I have no money at all. Oh my gosh, that present is ridiculous, but awesome! I don't get presents like that! (One year, my dad bought my mom some expensive earrings, but he didn't want her to guess what they were, so he built a huge dollhouse-type frame out of wood and filled it with things that made noise like Salt and Pepper shakers, jingle bells, etc, and then taped the earrings to the wall. It was awesome, once she found them.)

Reviewer: James Jameson
Date: 12/23/08 22:04
Chapter: Chapter 1

omg schmergo.
the part with jordan and giorgi made me cry, that was so incredibly sweet. :')

and you used hanky panky again. haha i love that word. as i explained before :)

Author's Response: Thank yoooou! I wanted to do something... unique with Jordan and Giorgi. Because I have my very fun, goofy Emma/Tyrone ship, so I wanted an interesting beta couple as well. And somehow, I didn't see it as being Haley and her random pulled-off-the-street date! Glad you liked the title, hehe.

Reviewer: KittyCatLover
Date: 12/23/08 21:32
Chapter: Chapter 1

Haha, this was great, I started laughing soooo hard, my mom asked me what I was doing. I couldn't think about the title without thinking of Patrick Wormwood and laughing (P&PJP update? pleaseeeee!) in a semi-related way, I went to a Beatles reenacting impersonation concert thingy, which was totally amazing, and all I could think of when they play 'When I'm 64' was Lucious sending letters from Azkaban as was done in your spoof. ^_^

In response to your response of my review, Apollo 13 wasn't sent up on the 13th (as many people including myself have thought) but was supposed to go into orbit of the moon that day.

Now to the actually story! It was totally amazing and I loved Tyrone dressing up and singing and 'borrowing' Jordan's guitar. The Jordan/Giorgi part was a ton of fun, I love how the corsage was in all different colors, and the dancing and all that (I love to ballroom dance!). I had a feeling that all the candy canes would be for Emma! ^_^ All my favorite ships (well, Haley's doesn't really count, I ship Haley/Antionely ^_^) what a wonderful early Christmas present! I hope you have a wonderful and merry Christmas and a happy new year! (Now I fell kind of like singing that song...)
~Anna

Author's Response: Awww, thank yoooou! And yes, I was hoping that the title would be a little wink-wink to people who have read Pride and Pre-Juiced Plums. Which I SHOOOULD update! *Kicks self in nose and passes out* *Comes to* And dude, I can't hear "When I'm Sixty-Four" without thinking of Lucius, either. Just like how I can't hear "Do You Hear The People Sing" without thinking, "Do you hear the people scream/Screaming the screams of dying men/Yes, it is music to my ears/Because they can't fight back again!"

Glad you liked the Jordan/Giorginess, because it was so much fun for me. I've never written Jordan/Giorgi before, so it was an interesting experience for meeee. And I hope you have a splendid Christmas yourself. Mine's looking pretty good.

Reviewer: Helios Sol
Date: 12/23/08 21:10
Chapter: Chapter 1

Whoa! It's an AU AU!
-Hmm...I think I would fall into roughly two or three of those categories.
-Ha. That's very funny, the whole glass half-empty.
-Yes, those Amish people. Their computers are practically part of them. Just like me and my hay-spearing-trident-thing. Pitchfork, I think it is.
-During Tyrone's interrogation-type thing, there's a seemingly misplaced colon and space, right in front of his question about Emma's middle name.
-Err... to demostrate my lack of fashion-knowledge, what is a "cummerbund"?
-I haven't yet read the identity of the sombrero-wearing person, but I bet its Tyrone.
-I guess you forgot the upside down question mark (which is what my Spanish teacher says it's technically called) before the "te gusta"? I'm not entirely sure gusta should end with an a, but I can't remember that little part. And to think I'm considering signing up to tutor Spanish. And the "Me Amo" part shouldn't have "Me". I believe that it means me or my. So...I'm confused.
-Actually, with the arrivderci thing, perhaps you meant to have poor grammar. But, you need an accent over the "i" in sí, otherwise it's "if".
-Jeez. Tyrone's insane.
-I did that to a coconut once. I couldn't get it quite right, I think my cut was too uneven.
-I might see a mispelling (sp?) on "Merrye" referring to the song.
-Really? Emma would go to the ball with him for 140 candy canes? Hmm. I think that would have been a better title.
-Err...and what's a boutonniere?
-Isn't a corsage some kind of medieval women's garment? Am I mixing it up with something?
-You smell good. Brilliant line.
-Ha on what Haley sees, both. Err... do I see an innapropriate pun?
-I had a feeling Giorgi had something to do with Jordan.
-Wow. That's interesting. I didn't remember Giorgi being taller than Jordan.
-Upside down exclamation mark?
-Wow. Clearly its AU AU if Emma is kissing Tyrone in such a way in public. Why does everyone keep cheering for them, anyway? Plot device type thing?

Good story overall, I'd give it a 9.9/10

Author's Response: Whoa, Helios Sol! Hooray! (For the record, I'm an irritating person, and sometimes a stupid person.) Haha, 'hay-spearing-trident-thing.' Sorry about the weird typos-- I'm an endless well of untapped typos, aren't I? Oh, a cummerbund is the wide fabric belt that buckles in the back, which you wear with a tuxedo. I'm a bit clothing-obsessed, so I feel sorry for mentioning obscure things!

I didn't forget the extra question marks and exclamation points-- I just didn't know how to put them in on my computer! I speak NO SPANISH AT ALL, and I only know how to insert German characters, like umlauts and those symbols they use for 'double s's. However-- the only reason why I used Spanish is because.. TYRONE DOESN'T SPEAK SPANISH, EITHER! ^_^ So I used my terrible Spanish for comedic effect. Because Tyrone THINKS he's a master at Spanish, but he's totally clueless.

Tyrone certainly IS insane. I tried cutting up coconuts myself, and it just wouldn't work. But when I went to see Spamalot, I BOUGHT a set of coconuts there that you can bang together that are premade, and it's perfect! (Incidentally, have you seen the special features on the Holy Grail DVD where they talk about how to prepare coconuts? It's hilarious.)

"Merrye" was actually on purpose, because I was trying to write in Old English-looking spelling. But I can see how that didn't transfer well. Actually-- you're kind of a mind reader. I almost called the story "140 Candy Canes," but I thought that might give something away, so I stuck to something more obscure. I guess I'm like that with titles.

As Tyrone explains, a boutonniere is a man corsage. But since you don't know what a corsage is, I guess that doesn't help anything. A corsage is a little bundle of flowers that a guy gives a girl when they go to a dressy dance, like homecoming or prom. The flowers are either pinned to the front of the girl's dress or worn on a bracelet around her wrist.Boys usually have no idea what corsages and boutonnieres are until their mums or other girls they know explain it to them (my date to homecoming didn't!), so I used that as a running gag. In High School Musical 3, which I actually enjoyed a lot, in one of the songs where the characters are preparing to go to prom, the girls sing, "Makeovers, massages," and the boys sing, "Don't know what a corsage is!" So you're definitely not alone.

I don't remember making any inappropriate puns! Maybe you're just sick? ^_^ Hehehe.

Giorgi is actually half a foot taller than Jordan! He's five-foot-six and she's six feet even. I thought it was kind of cute. And it adds more awkwardness to their relationship! I think everyone's cheering for them because it's EMMA, and everyone's kind of been taking bets on how long it'll take Emma to cave.It's a small school, so pretty much everyone knows Tyrone and Emma, and they know the long-standing... interestingness between them! Thank you SOOOO much for the lovely, positive rating!

Reviewer: Nova
Date: 12/23/08 20:23
Chapter: Chapter 1

Aww! That was so cute. x3
You should make Giorgi and Jor-jums get together in further chapters of 'The Past'. That would be awesome :D.
Wow. Who would say no to some-one serenading them in the middle of a Potions class while wearing a home-made suit of armour?

Merry Christmas!

Author's Response: Awww, thank you! And merry Christmas to you, too. And, um, I would NEVER say no to anyone who serenades me during class! The "Lord Tyrone" is based on an incident that happened my freshman year of high school. We were sitting in chorus, when all of a sudden, this dude comes in in tights and yells, "PRESENTING... PRINCE ERIK!" And a red carpet unrolled, and this guy comes inside wearing a home-made suit of armour and he says to some girl, "Elissa... willst thou goeth to Homecoming with me?" It was the cutest thing I have ever seen.

Reviewer: Hermione Lurves Ron
Date: 12/23/08 18:37
Chapter: Chapter 1

Where're Ted and Ivy?

Is it wrong that Haley is actually freakishly like me except in looks?

That Monty Python reference MADE MY DAY.



Author's Response: I didn't put Ted and Ivy in because this one-shot might be read by people who've never read Potter's Pentagon before, and I didn't want to introduce TOO many characters in a short story. They were in the first draft, but I cut them to keep it from being confusing. And don't worry, Haley is fun-- people who are like Haley are the BOMB! Glad you liked the Monty Python!

Reviewer: Calico
Date: 12/23/08 17:12
Chapter: Chapter 1

That was so sweet! I was happy that Emma gave in to Tyrone for once - but Jordan and Giorgi stole the show for me. I think Jordan's technological-dancing was so creative and romantic, even more romantic than everything Tyrone did. Thank you for such a wonderful Pentagon Christmas!

Author's Response: Har har, thank you! And believe it or not, the Jordan and Giorgi pair was actually supposed to be the more 'romantic' pair, whereas Tyrone and Emma were mostly just there for comedy. I'm so glad this was accepted just before Christmas!

Reviewer: Heiress_of_Insanity_
Date: 12/23/08 16:18
Chapter: Chapter 1

Okay, first of all, this story is the funniest thing I've read in a while(hence the near-excessive copy-pasting) and secondly I WISH THIS WAS CANON. *sigh* If only because I haven't let go of Jordan/Giorgi...

that and being stubborn, being easily angered, being tactless, and being painfully blunt.

Wow...she sounds like me! I can't decide whether that's a good or bad thing, though. Of course, when you're stubborn about something and then proven wrong, it's quite a blow to your pride. Especially when your ten year old brother outsmarts you...........(no, I don't feel any pain on this subject. are you crazy????)

the idea of Jordan in love is the scariest thing I can imagine.

Once again I must proclaim my undying love for Jordan/Giorgi...That was one of my favorite parts, not including Haley learning her date's name (and the subsequent events) and Tyrone's two ridiculous proposals in the potions room.

“That’s my guitar!”

That part made me laugh SO HARD, and I don't even know why. XD I love me some Jor-Jums, in all of his black-clothed glory (though I thought of him as more of a white button-up, tie, and dark wash jeans or khaki's type of dude...why am I even talking about this???)

I thouroughly enjoyed this (whoops, almost called it a chapter...if only) story! Now I just have to wait for it all to happen IRL...PPIRL, at least. Happy Christmas, again! I CAN'T WAIT!!!! SANTA TIME!!!! wOotZ~

H_o_I_

Author's Response: Oh, I am so glad you liked this (and thought it was funny, of course!) And there is no need to 'let go' of Jordan/Giorgi, though this is probably the most romantic you will ever see them. Emma is pretty ridiculous, but I love her-- and though I initially didn't see anything of myself in her, I'm starting to find some resemblance the more and more I write about her. (By the way, I am TOTALLY the type who never admits I'm wrong-- I'm always making excuses.) For some reason, I loved the idea of Tyrone stealing Jordan's guitar and Haley's pony pillow, so I'm glad you thought that was funny, too!

Hehe, I liked your fashion ideas for Jor-jums. Honestly, he is not that fashionable a guy-- he's the kind who THINKS he's a cool rebel. "Oh, I wear black, so I'm hardcore and controversial!" No, no you're just an uptight, overachieving nerd. But at least he tries! *Huggles Jordan and pinches his sullen little cheeks*

HAPPY HOLIDAAAAYS!

Reviewer: mahogany_wand
Date: 12/23/08 15:45
Chapter: Chapter 1

Ah, Haley... Well, great chappie! I kept laughing, so my Jordan-ish brother came and kicked me. He's a sweetie, isn't he?

Jor-jums and Giorgi! Toooooo cute!

I lurved this story! fantastic job!

~M_W

Author's Response: Hehehehe, thank you so much! And I wish I had a Jordanish brother, instead of a ridiculous brother who is obsessed with Legally Blonde and Scooby Doo (and is fourteen years old). Glad you liked the Jordan-ness... I had so much fun writing this story, and I'm really glad you liked it.

Reviewer: Luna_Lovegood11
Date: 12/23/08 15:40
Chapter: Chapter 1

Yay!

Even if it's AU, I'm thrilled to have something representing both Giorgi/Jordan and Emma/Tyrone.

Lovely. I loved the whole Sinclair deal, and Jordan was being human! *cheer*

Happy Christmahanukwanzaa to you! xD

~Rory

Author's Response: Yes, mwahahaha! This is my shippiest story yet! And Sinclair was a last-minute addition, but I had lots of fun with him. (As I'm sure Haley did!)

So, my friend and I invented a new winter holiday, called Checks And Balances Day. Because we're totally writing a rap opera about Baron Montesquieu, where everyone sings opera, except for Baron Montesquieu, who raps. And he starts up Checks And Balances Day, where everyone gets the exact same presents, and the toy companies, candy companies, and greeting card companies check each other's powers. We're weird. So have a Cheerful Checks And Balances Day, or Baron Montesquieu will get you!

Reviewer: tilli
Date: 12/23/08 15:18
Chapter: Chapter 1

aww!!! its all warm and fuzzy!!!

Author's Response: Yes! Like microwaved cats! (*Scares away more reviewers' cats*)

Reviewer: Rhian Elizabeth
Date: 12/23/08 13:55
Chapter: Chapter 1

Ha ha! Tyrone IS indeed adorable...I especially liked the knight costume and tiny Hufflepuff squire. ^_^
I also loved Jordan's dance with Giorgi...I wish Kay and I could do that, 'cause we love to dance (like, actual dancing, BALLROOM dancing) but we're usually online when we're talking/typing.
The ending was very sweet. ^_^

Author's Response: Thank you so much, E! I lurves my Tyrone... as you very well know. And I am so glad that you liked the ending, too, because I wrote the whole story in one day and it was rather rushed.

Reviewer: JustLikeHermione77
Date: 12/23/08 13:12
Chapter: Chapter 1

lol i was laughing so hard when i read how tyrone tried to get emma to go to the ball with her that my cat looked scared and ran away. lol good story!

Author's Response: Thanks! I guess scaring away cats is a good way of measuring the insanity of my stories! I am aiming for an insanity level of SIX CATS SCARED AWAY, and that's when I'll know I've succeeded.

Reviewer: ringobeatlesfan4
Date: 12/23/08 11:49
Chapter: Chapter 1

Well then! This certainly was interesting! I can't believe that anyone, een the great Schmergo, can pack that much entertainment and comedy into a not-even-10000-word story! It was amazing. Tyrone was hilarious, and I loved his potions-class antics.And Haley and Sinclair were very funny, too. And about Tyrone and the candy canes: in four houses, in seven years per house, shouldn't there be a lot more than 140 girls to give candy canes to?

And when Tyrone started speaking in Spanish, I almost died. I hate Spanish, but somehow if I just imagine Tyrone speaking it during class, maybe I can get through it! Really good story though! (in your response to one of my reviews to The Past, u mentioned u thought i would like this. u were right, i did) {BeccA}

Author's Response: Beccca, Becca, Becca! I love getting reviews from you! I'm glad you thought it was hilarious... I am less happy about the math, though. My math is terrible. I multiplied five times four (five girls per House) and got twenty, and then I multiplied twenty by seven and got 140, but that is probably wrong. I did it in my head. There is a reason why I write fanfiction during math class-- I have no head for math at all!

I'm glad that someone who actually takes Spanish could understand my pidgeon Spanish at all. I speak NO Spanish at all, only German and English, so it was totally botched. Thank you again so much for (my first!!!) review!

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