Long time fan, although I've never reviewed, for some reason.
I'm a huge fan of Emma as a character, I think that she's the best non-canon character I've seen yet - and better than most potrayals of canon characters in fanfics. You seem really comfortable in her voice.
I also love your writing style - it's so candid, and everything seems to flow so nicely. I just wrote a blog post about fanfics and how people try to use words that they don't really understand and it ends up being awkward, and you don't do that. Kudos.
This story is really cute - I love the way that Tyrone finally gets Emma to say yes, but that Emma still isn't sure why she agreed. Everything seemed very in-character (although I haven't finished reading Potter's Pentagon yet), and while I didn't notice the lack of Ivy/Ted, when I realized they weren't there, it did sadden me. I totally understand why they had to be cut, though.
I'm off to go plug for other people to come read your stuff!
Hi, Schemerg_the_Impaler! I absolutely love the Potter's Pentagon series, as well as this story and The Dark Lord's Blog, the first one I ever read (of your stories). Every single one of your stories (including the wicked and HSM parodies) are so hilarious that they make me fall off my seat at least once without fail.
I KNOW this story was about Emma/Tyrone, and I sure loved them (everything Tyrone did made me fall out of my seat twice) but I honestly think Jordan and Giorgi stole the show! They are SO CUTE together! I've been addicted to Jordan from the second his name in the story, and for some reason I just can't get enough of him (does this sound like an addiction to you?). THis story only made me become even more addicted to him than I already was.
AWESOME STORY BY THE WAY! I WANT MORE JOR-JUMS!
The music switched to a slower song, and as Jordan swayed back and forth, he could almost feel Giorgi’s warm waist snugly nestled in his arms. Balls were loud, noisy, crowded, embarrassing. Jordan was terribly awkward in big groups, never quite sure of what to do with himself. This, he could manage. This, he could do forever.
The whole time I was thinking...if it's not Giorgi, heads will roll.
Well, if it weren't 1:44 am right now, I'd do a giant victory dance...
This made me very happy.
Author's Response: Thannnk you. I had a lot of fun with this story.
This is an amazing short story, I love it.
"He had attached a large pillow shaped like a horse’s head to the end of his broomstick and was riding it like a hobby horse, while the first year followed him, bashing two coconuts together. " - Monty Python and the Holy Grail. I love that movie. It is so funny and amazing.
Anyway, this is a great Potter's Pentagon story. I love how Tyrone comes into Zabini's classroom all dressed up and singing, I wonder, where does he come up with these ideas, they are just odd. But that's what Tyrone is.
I love the candy cane idea. That was too funny. I am soo happy that Emma finally said yes, though I would of loved to see what else Tyrone could of come up with.
Haley is so funny. Going with some guy she never met, wow. Jordan is soo cute with Giorgi, I love their idea, I would so do it, if I could, and if I was as amazing as they are.
I am so happy that Emma ended up with Tyrone, it took her a while, but they are so definitely for each other.
This was probably one of your best stories after The Potter's Pentagon, of course. Thanks for writing it.
Author's Response: Thank you so much!! I think this is one of my best stories, too, and since I rarely get reviews for it, this really made me happy! It makes me really happy that you laughed at all of the crazy situations that I came up with.
Wow I kinda relised I made a ton of mistakes, on that last reviewer thing. I just noticed that this is a really really really long story. Yay it's an even number of reviews, it kinda bugged my I made it an odd number.
-Windy who is currently on a reviewing spree, of the exact same story except this one isn't a review its more of a rather unexpected comment
Author's Response: Psh, I made a ton of mistakes on the story. It's okay. And YES, this was such a long one-shot! But I had to get it in in time for the contesty thing, so I couldn't chop it into two chapters as initially written!
I'm back! (that took about 10 min.) why am I back you ask? I'm back because as I hit the submit button I noticed something something I wanted to say. I noticed at the end notes that you said "hohohoh" did you forget that "o" or did you plan this? This of course is not a valid reason but I have a few more things to say.
and I love that part with Tyrone, and the candy canes. I especially love how you described the owls. I wanted to laugh so hard! But I was supposed to be doing school, and I din't see anything amusing about geography so I had to stiffle them. This is a relatively short one for me. I can't think of anything else to say. Hola ( that mean by too? Oh well if it doesn't than it's another thing that either brings me closer to Gorgi, or Haley.) Oh! jus thought of something. I for one as a dedication to Haley, cannot lift one eyebrow, and since I like to pretend to be sarcastic, and witty, this doesn't go down very well. I can kinda make it look like I can raise my eyebrow by tilting my head special though. Has she tried that? o.k. I'm done now.
-Windy who cannot raise one eyebrow, in which this upsets her greatly
P.S. This is super short for me, so short it's actually normal, almost. Aren't you glad I decided not to doo the ten million P.S. things?
Author's Response: When I typed this story-- as you might have noticed-- several keys on my keyboard were broken. Hence all of the missing letters! WHOOPSIE DAISIES! I had to slide my finger around into the pit where the key used to be in little circles... and only sometimes would they appear.
I swear I've never microwaved cats! Just marshmallow peeps and cans of soup. And I'm so glad I made you want to laugh! This story wassss indeed meant to be funny.
Believe it or not, I raise my eyebrow WAY. TOO.MUCH. It kinda creeps people out, actually!
Oh that was sweet, but the last part wasn't really Emma, well that figures since Emma and romance are oppisites, but I always pictured Emma romance different. I notice that there were two film references by Emma there. Does being around Tyrone make Emma refer to everything as a film? I found it weird how she refered to everything as "like a fairytale" that's a rather far cry from Emmas normal response, but since none of this is normal for Emma I'll let it slide. Did Tyrone in his obession make her watch the wizard of Oz or did Hermione or Ivy do that already (I mean they both have a thing about showing people classics (Ivy in Pride, and Pre-juiced Plums, like you don't already know....))
Speaking of Ivy. I SEE A STRANGE LACK OF IVY & TEDDY!!Where were they during this one shot of rather startling love. Oh yes startling love that brings up another piont. dear little JOR-JUMS!( Oh dear I've started using Haley's nickname next I'll refer to Tyrone as Tyroonie, and spend my days wearing sparkling pink things, and singing musicals, while eating suger quills( Gasp I almost said pens, oh the travesty).(actually I manage to sing a lot I never stop really, but the only musical I sing is Wicked)Scary.)
Jor-jums, and Gorgi, a pressing matter. Will this display of love continue or is this just anothe little one shot thing, because if it is I'm going to be extremely miffed. After I finish harassing you with this review (which is not a review as much as a demending line of questions with rather bad jokes to accompany them.) I'm going to to look for stories about their future kiddes! If there isn't I'm going to spend more of my time being miffed at you. It seems I'm spending a lot of my time being potentially miffed at you.
Speaking of something totally random someday ten million years later the first chapter of my Ted Lupin fan fic. The reason is which I was going to origionally base all the teachers on my friends, but then I wanted to be a student instead, and get married of to one of the main characters ( creepy of me but I do that a lot anyway. It's not ted). SO then I felt guilty trapping all my closest friennds,as teachers so I have to go make them all students now. In which I'm having trouble creating all the teachers now. Confusing isn't it? Which is to say almost never. Apparently I've run out of random things to say if I'm refering to my book. So I guess it's byes for now till I find something else of yours to review! * Cackles Merrily Away* ( can you cackle merrily?)
-Windy the merry cackler
Author's Response: Oh thank you for your wonderful long review! As for the whole Emma seeming out of character thing, weirdly enough, the reason she's acting that way is that she's FINALLY relaxing and letting her guard down and being her real self, not trying to convince herself that she's thoroughly unsentimental and unromantic-- which is not true! And she refers to things as fairy tale because Emma constantly says throughout the series that she detests fairy tales of any kind... and this is kind of showing that facade melting away! And yes, Tyrone DID make her watch Wizard of Oz. It's one of his favorites, and Haley loves it, too-- she loves that kind of campy stuff.
Ivy and Ted aren't in this one because in my first draft, they showed up from time to time, but I realized that new readers who'd never read any other Potter's Pentagon stories would be confused by me introducing so many new characters in such a new story. So I decided to scrap them and develop the characters that I did have some more! SINGING WICKED IS FUN FUN FUN FOR EVERYONNNNNE! I LIKE TO BE MADAME MORRIBLE!
Jor-jums and Giorgi... well, this is the most romantic you will see them in canon. But that doesn't mean that they're not interested in one another! ;-) Affections are... certainly implied. As for Jordan's future, you will read all about that in the epilogue of The Past, and maybe a few other stories.
Hmm... about your story (and don't worry, I'd love to marry Jordan!), for teachers, I'd say to base them on teachers that you have or have had! A great teacher can be modeled on your favorite; a horrible teacher on your least favorite. I've had a lot of bizarre teachers who I really should've used in my story, but instead, I was just uncreative and made Zabini like Snape 2.0... though the significance of Zabini does go into play later.
Wow, u r so insane.... and that is why i luv ur storeez!
Author's Response: I take both parts of that review as TREMENDOUS COMPLIMENTS! Thank you!
THIS. WAS. AWESOME.
I have to admit, i completely forgot about this fic, as i had to run out the door immediately after reading the new chapter in Potter's Pent.
DOES THIS MEAN GIORGI/JORJUMS IS OFFICIAL???(please say yes, because if you don't I will be extremely irate.) that was sooo sweet, what Jordan did. A bit weird, but totally in-character for Jordan. I wish he had just Flooed Giorgi there...but alas. Like Tyrone, I'll take what I can get.
NO COMPRENDO!!! GREATNESS.
and when he said te gusta, I nearly died laughing. in English the literal translation for gusta is "pleases me to..."(you knew that) and it is so funny to imagine Tyrone saying "Eet pleases you?" with a ridiculous Spanish accent.
*crosses fingers with high hopes for Giorgi/Jordan* P.S. do you have a meshy name for them?
Author's Response: Oh, wowzers! Thank you so much! As for Giorgi/Jorjums... it never says they're officially ANYTHING, does it? I mean, I've gone to dances with dudes who are not my boyfriend. ^_^ But it DOES mean that Jordan cares enough about Giorgi to do something that elaborate. By the way, the ship Giorgi/Jordan is, in my opinion, called Giorjums. Or Jordanderson. Dunno, I haven't come up with anything cool yet-- it;s hard when you have two people with the same name.
I actually don't speak ANY Spanish at all, so I hope my Spanish wasn't TOOO sucky. Thank you again for your review! I had a lot of fun writing this, so it's always lovely to get reviews.
Argh! I loved this! I had to read it in about five different sittings because my sisters kept nicking the computer and so I was reduced to sitting around, twiddling my thumbs and wondering what the hell Jordan was doing. He and Giorgi were so cute!
I love Hayley! The bit about the cup made me laugh a lot. I missed Ted from this story though...
I liked the coconuts - Monty Python is just the best. When I went to Spamalot I tried to get my dad to buy me some of the coconut halves they were selling in the foyer but he wouldn't. He got me a t-shirt though, so I shouldn't complain (I wear that t-shirt way too much).
Anyway I thought this was amazing!
Author's Response: Ah, thank you! And I'm so glad you liked the Jordan/Giorgi. I have a definite soft spot for my Jor-Jums! I didn't include Ted and Ivy because I didn't want to overload people who had never read Potter's Pentagon with too many characters! They originally had small parts in the story, but I edited them out. Hey, I wear my Spamalot t-shirt all the time, too! It says, "I'm not dead yet."
***"Jordan was the ‘this glass is half-empty, as I proved with this complex mathematical process,’ type, while Haley was more of the, ‘this glass is half-full, and the drink inside is YUMMMMY, and it reminds me of a song, and I’m going to start singing it right here in public’ type." That made me laugh so hard!
***"He was good at sneering. It was part of the Slytherin-Potions-Master job description." so i guess i'll never be a potions master( im horrible at sneering!)
***“What the…?” exclaimed Jordan, whipping around. “That’s my guitar!” That reminded me of the time i stole my friends guitar and he started chasing me around his room...good times...
***" Emma was rather impressed; she’d never heard of a boy who actually knew what a boutonniere was all on his own." What is a boutonniere? no one i know knows (cool a tounge twister!)
*** The whole Jordan/Giorgi thing is so cuute!!! they are like my favorite couple ever!!! will they get together in THE PAST???
sorry 'bout the long review...
Author's Response: Awww, this is a lovely review! I've actually practiced sneering a lot, and I've gotten quite good at it. Just look up videos of Patti LuPone and Elvis Presley singing on youtube and your lip will start looking like you've had a stroke, too! By the way, a boutonniere is like a corsage, but for men. It's a flower that a man wears on the front of his jacket. As for "The Past"... well, you'll find out in... the future! Mwahaha!
Oh my goodness, WHY HAVE I NOT REVIEWED THIS STORY YET???
Okay, I'm totally convinced McGonagall is, like, the great-aunt or whatever of Patrick. They're the only two people who say 'hanky-panky,' plus, they even look alike! (That was a lie, I can't remember what Patrick looks like)
Typoes- the way her eyebrows arched up to he hailine 'He' should be 'her' and hairline is missing the r.
I might have to add ‘boring to the mix.” Boring should have an end quote.
I love the paragraph that describes the differences between Haley and Jorjums. Especially the glass part... I can see them arguing about that during a meal or whatnot.
Speaking of Jordan, I now have an even deeper love for him. Not only is he dorkily trying to be 'cool', but dancing with Giorgi over the computer? *dies of happiness* I know the fic was about Emma and Tyrone, but I think Jordy stole the show. You should do a one-shot about him and Giorgi one day.
she screamed in a voice that could peel paint at miles away. I don't know where you got this line from, but it's hilarious!
Tyrone's horrible Spanish dance was hysterical. Especially 'me amo' at the end (ah, I knew taking Spanish would benefit me somehow!) I love the knight-in-armor, too- what song did Tyrone rip off? I don't recognize it.
Poor Sinclair. He had no idea what he was getting himself into... but I must admit, I don't completely like just because he's not Vladislav, who is the one Haley should be with for eternity (in my opinion, anyway)
The end is awesome. I'm sad this won't be in The Past, though- this was a great way for them to get together.
I'm love this story, so, to take a leaf out of Tyrone's book- gracias, señorita!
Happy (belated) holidays!
PS- Congrats on making the MerMuggles thing. I couldn't guess which one was your voice, though... guess I'll wait and see!
Author's Response: Hooray! A review from PnP! (Incidentally, I just submitted the next chapter of "Pride and Pre-Juiced Plums" a few days ago!) Actually, Patrick and McGonagall do kind of look alike-- dark hair and glasses, at least. Though I guess you could say the same of Harry Potter. But actually, I got the phrase 'hanky-panky' from my mom-- who ALSO has dark hair and glasses! Hmmmm.... interesting.
I'm so sorry about all of the typos! I wrote this story all in one day-- the day that the contest closed-- and tried to submit as fast as possible. I guess I should've known better.
Glad you thought Jordy stole the show! That was my evil, evil intention all along! And I'm glad that you liked Tyrone's ridiculous antics, as well, because they were so much fun to come up with. The knight-in-armor song was just something I came up with off the top of my head-- not based on anything, as far as I know. I'm flattered that you thought it might have been something real, though!
Sad that this isn't in "The Past," but look on the bright side-- now Emma and Tyrone get THREE DIFFERENT WAYS of getting together! (One in this story, one in "The Past," and one in "Pride and Pre-Juiced Plums.") And honestly, I cannot decide which one I like the best. I like them all equally! As for Haley... well, you'll see in Pride and Prejuiced Plums who she ends up with for eternity, but I have to say, I will always have a soft spot for Vladislav.
My voice in the MerMuggles thing was...
SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER
SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER
The one that says "'how do you do, how do you do,' said Fudge." Naturally, they picked the bit with me doing the most demented voice!
When Haley was singing 'God Rest Ye Merry Hippogriffs', you had a 'e' on the end of 'Merry'.
Anyway, I screamed bloody blue murder when I came to the Giorgi/Jordan part.
My dad asked me if I wrote this story that I was reading.
I told him my writing-role-model wrote it.
He just walked away.
He walks away from all things Harry Potter.
Tyrone was fluffy in this story!
I was really excited when I read the 'God Rest Ye Merry Hippogriffs' thing. I love that song sooo much.
My story got rejected! *cries from the lasting pain*
It was too short and cheesy, so I'm working on a Marauder story and a Dumbledore one-shot!
Wes...who is a girl!
Author's Response: Hey, thank you, Wes! I put the 'e' on the end of "Merrye" to make it seem like Old English, but you're not the first to nitpick that, so I guess my point didn't come across well. Oh, and thank you so much for the LOVELY, LOVELY compliment about being your 'writing role model!' You're making me blush here! And yes, Tyrone was so fluffy, but I had so much fun.
Oooh, I'm sorry about your story being rejected. *Gives you Consolation Internet Pumpkin Bread* I was a member of MNFF for almost a year before my first story got accepted... I think I have more rejections than anyone else on MNFF. (I still get rejected all the time, too.) But keep trying!!!
YAAAAAAAY!!! i loooovelovelove this story. Basically, I love anything to do with anything you write. Haha.
Let me just say, if I were Emma, I would DIE of embarrassment if some dude came up and sang to me in the middle of class. But then, if I were Emma, I would react like Emma did, because, well, I would BE her. Yeah. So if I were in Emma's situation, I would die. Yeppers.
Mmmkay, JORDAN/GIORGI. SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! Awwww, Jordan is so adorable. When he's not all emo and depressed and morbid and a cruelly efficient genius and stuff.
I have decided something. Giorgi NEEDS to attend Hogwarts. Yep. Now, I kNOW, she can't do magic, but she could learn the theory and stuff, and she could do home study of all her Muggle subjects and she would actually have FRIENDS! And Jorjums would be less emo with her sunshiney spirit around! Okay, so maybe it wouldn't work, but it's an idea.
On a different note, but not an entirely obscure one, I drew the Pentagon (and Tyrooney) as fairies. Yes. I dunno why, but for a couple weeks I was OBSESSED with fairies and the drawing thereof (and I still am, sorta.) The point is, I drew them, and they amuse me greatly. Teehee. I shall have to send them to you. Along with a couple other rather amusing drawings of them. Yep. Should I PM you on the boards or summat?
Author's Response: Oh my gosh, thank you so much! IN ANY CASE! I'm not Emma, because if some dude sang to me in the middle of class, I would totally acquiesce right there. I'm a bit more Haleyish in that department, I guess. But I love singing and public humiliation. As for Giorgi attending Hogwarts, that won't happen, but that doesn't mean things won't improve at Giorgi's schooool!
Dude, I absolutely MUST SEE Potter's Pentagon characters as fairies. That sounds like the coolest thing ever. They need awesome fairy names like Puck and Mustardseed and Peaseblossom and Oberon!
I will definitely put those on my "reading list". Thanks
Author's Response: Ooh, cool! It's always fun to get a new reader, hehehe.
I haven't read anything about the Potter's Pentagon characters. I'm guessing it must be a story I haven't found yet?
Author's Response: Ah, it's a whole Trilogy and a spinoff that you haven't found yet! If you go to my profile, you can find Potter's Pentagon: The Five, Potter's Pentagon: The Truth, Potter's Pentagon: The Past, and "Pride and Pre-Juiced Plums: A Potter's Pentagon Love Story." Basically, they're my next-generation crew I invented a long time before DH came out. But there is a character named Ted Lupin-- DH was a coincidence!
haha, love the microwaved cats!!!
Author's Response: I love them, too!
The only thing I'm remotely confused about is the era.
Author's Response: Post-Hogwarts, about... twenty-three years after Voldemort's death. It's sixth year for the Potter's Pentagon characters.
Oh my cod I LOVED IT! This was so ADORABLE! Emma and Tyrone were hilariously cute, Haley's random ambush of someone with the name "Sinclair" was great and Jordan ... Well. Talk about the sweetest thing ever written.
Anyway, yeah, I loved it. And I totally picked up on the Monty Python reference! One time I went with my family to where that was filmed, and in the gift shop there were two coconut halves on the counter, but no one could tell us whether they were the originals or not. I like to think that they were.
Also I loved "Oh, is THIS hanky panky?" It was pretty funny. I love Tyrone. Actually ... I basically love all the Pentagon boys. I am such a hussy. Although I'll admit Jor-jums is still front runner, especially after I got to imagine him in a tux. Hello adorable.
Anyway. Happy Christmas! I loved it!
Author's Response: Thank you! I thought you might like the Jordan-ness, hehe. And I would have LOVED to see the genuine Monty Python coconuts. And you know what? I'm an INCESTUOUS hussy, because I love all of the Potter's Pentagon boys as well, and I created them. So that's even weirder. (And Jordan is a total cutie, yes!)
My favourite part? Jordan & Giorgi's date. ^_^ It made me warm & fuzzy all over. That, and it's DEFINITELY what I would prefer, given the choice.
Author's Response: Thank you! I thought that a socially inept nerd like Jordan might do better with a situation like that first... and I know Jordan/Giorgi is getting to be rather popular. I'd personally rather have the Emma/Tyrone situation happen to me (I'm just a show-off, let's be honest, and I'd love to have Tyrone humiliating himself to try to get me to go with him), but the Jordan/Giorginess was cute.