Oh. My. God. What a brilliant story! It's been a really long time since I've read such a series of scenes, and liked it so very much. I'm not a huge fan of tiny scenes of a single character that are strung together, but this was some amazing writing, and it's difficult for me to stop squeeing after having read this. *Favourites*
I think it was the description that pulled me in. It was so apt and drove the point so well. I think that you have a great skill for description- the metaphors, allusions, and personifications blended in so well with the flow of plot, and accented it beautifully. I also loved the reference to Lethe, by the way. Totally one of my favourite lines ever.
I also feel that the characterisation of Remus was beautifully brought out through his actions and thoughts. The reading of this story felt like a journey through his mind- a closer picture to what we know. The scenes that you chose to depict in this story, to me, are very relevant to Remus' life. First you bring out how his life shattered into pieces after the death of the Potters, and then you bring out how his life has become afterwards. The monotony in his actions, and his mindset which you picturise remarkably well with the references to sunrise and sunset. I loved how the war brings about a stark contrast between the second scene and the third, and how very different his reactions had become.
The ending, however, will remain my most favourite part. By Gods, it was magnificent. In the heartbeat before the darkness flies forth, it is not a shower of light, but something akin to that, something a little like love, or like happiness, that makes the heart burst and the throat constrict, something, he thinks – knows – fleetingly, a bit like peace at finding what he had lost. So, so remarkably touching. I could feel the emotions just bursting out through in these lines, and the thought process seems so realistic, like that of a person who is facing death. I liked that it was not memories/thoughts/emotions that are projected here, as they often are, but the description of what exactly the feeling of death is, more like. That is not something I see often, especially when I read stories concentrating mainly on the topic of death and the emotions felt at the point of time.
Overall, all I have to say is that I was literally floored by this masterpiece. Wonderful work!