Awww, I loved that. It had so much raw emotion. This was my favourite bit:
Tears pricking,
Mind racing,
Heart breaking.
I love it because I know that feeling...
Stunning, can't wait to read more of your work.
XXX
CoolCatElly/Elene
Wow. This was a great poem. I can really feel t he desperation of the character and how profound the last few lines are. Thanks for the few moments of enjoyment! Cyns
That is a beautiful poem about love, heartbreak and indecision. That is what I'm taking from your words. You have a special skill, in that you are able to catch a certain moment and frame it so superbly.
Carole xxx
I dont really like reading poetry but.. this caught me !! I can tell you..... I havent read something as nice as this in a long time. Long ago, I felt this way about someone but I think it was just my imagination. I dont feel that way about anyone anymore . But you expressed the way I used to feel about that person in words . Anyway, Your poem rox! Roxy rox!!!
Oh, this is beautiful! This is so sad: I see it as the breakup. I think we've all had those moments of "I wish I'd said something to make them stay...". I love the line about stirring coffee. It's only a few words but it sets the scenery for me; I instantly see a small cafe, and a girl sitting at a little table outside. Beautifully done--you really captured the passion of the moment!
Wow, that's beautiful. It's so simply written, and yet expressing so much. I can literally see her or him sitting at the morning table, the partner coming down, smiling shortly and then leaving. For good. For ever. And he or she wonders, why?
What I especially like is the question
How can I tell you
Exactly what you mean to me?
You take each line separately, creating a kind of chorus for in-between your stanzas, thus building a bridge that holds it together and yet separating the entire poem into stanzas.
Marvellous job, Roxy, dear, marvellous job. *hugs*
~Bine
Roxy,
I don't normally read poetry, but when I saw the name of our lovely HoH, I couldn't resist. What can I say? Though it was short, right from the beginning you invoked the feelings of despair and heartbreak. I could feel my heart breaking for the unknown person watching her or his love walk out the door. Great job, hon. I enjoyed reading this. Terri
