All I can say is: AMAZING. The dialogue is real, and so are the relationships. I think you could make it a bit easier to tell who's talking/narrating- especially with Fabian and Gideon. I loved how you really showed the camaraderie between the Order members, especially at the wedding. I adore, adore, adore your writing style. PLEASE update soon!
I think you're a brilliant writer. I found the rest of the story on ff.net. I had to look for it because I couldn't wait. I really really enjoyed each and every chapter of this, especially the last one, especially in that part where Sirius confesses about not attending funerals and about the thing about Marlene. Your characters are so alive and animated with quirks and your descriptions are really very awesome. I loved the tone, the poignant background and I simply loved how you incorporated some humour in that. That's what made this so sad for me to read. I read this a few hours ago and I'm still a little quiet from this encounter. A solid feeling of reality comes from your characters, the fact that they are surviving in the war and even when the moments are precious, something that occurs again and again is that people don't profess much upfront and the feelings that most bother them (in a good or bad way) remain unsaid inside them. I liked how there wasn't so much as tension between Marlene-Gideon-Sirius but more they really come off as realistic and breakable in their attitudes, like each of them were thinking subconsciously that I'll take what comes to me, like they are too afraid to reach out for what they want because you never know that you could lose it.
I absolutely loved this line here:
". . . and so maybe it was better this way, even if Sirius Black was breaking her heart without even paying attention and even if Gideon kept pinning his dreams on the sleeve of one pretty face or another, especially redheads"
I loved how this sentence seemed to go on for the length of a paragraph. People often say to cut such into smaller sentences. But there's just so much emotion coming from this line, it's brilliant, amazing.
Hope you still write -
This is really good! They remind me of the Weasley twins. They seem like real brothers, fighting like real brothers would. And i LOVED the converstaion about heroes. Great job!