WOW, now that's a song worthy of an HP book! I must say, you have a true gift for writing poetry, and nowhere is that displayed better than here. Outstanding job!
Author's Response: THAAAANKS!! I usually don't consider myself a poem, but I am quite proud of this. *hugs* ~GG
First of all, your title fits this long Sorting Hat's song... and it reads like an epic. You covered the founding of Hogwarts, went through the houses' descriptions and in the end the hat warned everyone. I can imagine sitting (or standing) in the Great Hall and hear the Hat actually sing this piece. Bravo.
What I also liked was your rhyming. Each stanza rhymes in the first/third line and then again in the second/fourth line. Wow! Really awesome work.
Probably my most favourite part of the poem was your description of Slytherin House:
For those of you who are ambitious
And seek out ways to increase your clout
Slytherin’s your house. It’s not malicious,
But a haven for you with goals so stout.
What Salazar had valued most
Was a pureblood Wizarding family tree.
If a righteous lineage you could boast,
Then fit for Slytherin you would be.
But those olden days are far gone now.
The house is not just for nobility.
Muggle-borns and half-bloods they allow
To uphold their stance on civility.
So if you are wily and stake out your claim,
Then silver and green robes you will wear.
Along with the others who value the same
Your home is in the Serpents’ lair.
You show really well what Slytherins value, what Salazar himself looked for in the students he chose to enter his house. And when you said that those days are long over and a new time has begun in Slytherin, my heart filled with joy.
What I had some little problems with were the rhythm of some stanzas. To me at least it was sometimes hard to get through because the rhythm was broken when there were too many syllables in one line, like in this stanza:
I make the decision from what I see:
Thoughts from your head, feelings from your heart.
Though if you think you know better than me
Your desired wish I will impart.
The second line has lots of syllables, and although I can see (and know) that each of the words is needed, it breaks the flow a bit.
But aside the little flow-breaking rhythm, all in all, it's a great poem, and in my opinion you met the challenge in all points.
Author's Response: Wow, first may I say THANK YOU for your extensive and very thought-out review. It's not every day you see someone who's taken the time to comment so thoroughly like you have. I really appreciate it. :)
I'm glad you liked the rhyming. That was by far the most time-consuming part --- trying to come up with abab rhymes for each stanza to still make sense. I'm also glad you liked the description of Slytherin. I personally like the stance taken at the end of DH that Slytherin's reputation is getting a little cleaner, and as this is set after DH, I felt that my song should reflect the new attitude.
You are absolutely right about the rhythm and flow of some stanzas. The fact was that in order to say what I needed to say and still keep the abab rhyme, sometimes the flow would be sacrificed. I hate that it had to happen that way, but what can you do? I tried to keep it as close to 9 syllables per line, but obviously that didn't happen. ;)
Thank you again, luinrina! Your comments are helpful and appreciated. :)
Wow. That was epic, good job. I wonder how it remembers it all if it can't write it down...
Author's Response: Haha, it would be quite difficult I imagine. But then again, that poor little had does have ALL YEAR to sit around and do nothing....lol. Thanks so much for your review, Lizzy! ~GG
Excellent Job. This is by far one of the best sorting hat verses that I have read. Keep up the good work.
Author's Response: Well thank you! I think it's the first time I've ever attempted to write a Sorting Hat song, so I'm glad that it ended up well. I really appreciate your review. Thank you again! ~GG
AWESOME song! Loved it a lot!!
All the best!!
Author's Response: Thanks, H.J.! You were a good cheerleader throughout my effort in writing the song. I appreciate your support! *hugs* ~GG