I Like It, Luna Is My Fave Hp POerson!!
Author's Response: I'm glad you liked it :)rnLuna is one of my favorites, too!
The emotion is so effectively worked into the narrative. I was a bit put off in the first sentence when I saw the first person point of view, but already in the second sentence I could hear Luna speaking. You "wove" her emotions and thoughts into the events and moments that influenced her so masterfully. It grips the reader firmly and doesn't let go until the end. I also really loved how you left everything balanced, like the emotion in the last two paragraphs. One sentence more or less could have destroyed the effect.
I especially loved the paragraph in which you describe how Luna takes notice of her grandmother's breathing. I used to do that all the time when I was little - it made me feel very much connected to the story, and I'm sure most people will feel the same way when they read it.
I glance at the cauldron again...
I think this should be "glanced".
A wonderfully written peace, it was such a delight to read :)
Author's Response: Thank you so much! I am really glad to hear such wonderful feedback. rnrnThe part with Luna and her Grandmother was based off of, as you picked up on, a real life experience. In the mist of the war that was going on, I felt like Luna would have some 'safe space', some small yet meaningful thing that she would notice. I'm glad that it connected you to the story more, and I do hope that it has that effect on others who read it.rnrnAlso, thank you for picking up on that error. You're right, I left off the 'd'. I've gone back and fixed it.rnrnThank you again for all of your comments and thoughts, and I am pleased that you enjoyed the story:)
I think that you have a good grasp of Luna's character. It seem so appropiate for her to love bubbles, and hope that the potion will make them.
I also love that to her, Harry is important because he gave her friendship. Not because he is the Boy who Lived, or the one who saved the wizarding world. While this is true for all who love Harry, it is especially true of Luna who doesn't care much for appearance.
Author's Response: Thank you for your comments!rnI always pictured Luna as one of those children who adored anything that defied normal standards, such as gravity; I'm glad you think she would too. Thanks again!
Except for a typo "not quiet registering that Harry just insulted them" a perfect little vignette. I loved it!
Author's Response: Thanks for pointing out the typo *goes to fix it*, and thanks for the review! I'm really glad that you liked it :)