And yes, there is yet another protest review haunting your thread: Review #4. As you have probably guessed, you will be receiving one very long, very well thought-out review a day until She Has an Air About Her is finally published. If the story is in the queue, I may see fit to show some consideration, but until then, the reviews will continue to be written!
You can completely tell that Marissa and her boys really do think of themselves as a family, and that Marissa does consider herself to be something of a mother, even to the older boys. At the very least, she has all the instincts of a mother and I am certain she would be willing to do anything to protect her boys. It must have been such a painful decision to leave her boys for Witness Stone, but so sweet that her boys seem to be doing everything they can to convince her to go. It shows that the love dynamic is not just one sided, and they really want Marissa to have the best that life can offer her. Even though every adult in Marissa's life tells her that she should go to this school, I think it was that her boys wanted her to go that proved to be the real reason she finally agreed.
Upon rereading this, I am SHOCKED by how heartless Professor Merrythought seems. "Don't worry about the boys. You aren't even family." no family is perfect, but what you get is what you've got. Marissa believes this very strongly, and I think this is part of what makes her such a wonderful character. Also, given the exchange in this chapter, it is no wonder that Marissa doesn't trust adults. As though a life on the streets wasn't enough to do that, now this stanger wants to take her away from everything she has ever know. I think this also helps to illistrate that not all children are Harry Potter. Even though Marissa's life on the streets can easily be described as terrible, she still would rather die than leave her boys. Not every mistreated child is so willing to give up everything they have to go far away and never come back. In retrospect, it kinda makes young Harry seem a bit cold for leaving the Dursleys, no matter how awful they treated him
I also couldn't help but feel quite sad when Marissa talked about everyone who had left her in her life. You just want to take her and giver her a BIG HUG. And when say said if she fell, they would just sweep her up with the rest of the trash...
Now I really need to give her a hug!
And you never did answer my question: Just how close are you to finishing your next chapter? You sent me an excerpt of it, so I know you have a good portion of it done!
And as to your question about joining in my protest, I'm not quite sure how that would work. Besides, how can you think about writing reviews for your own story when you should be focusing on finishing Marissa and the Wizards?!?!
While we are still on the subject of research, just how much research did you do into the lives of street children? Did you only use reference pieces, or were you also able to find fictional works on the subject? What about videos? I have seen a few videos on the subject of Brazilian street children on YouTube. I also imagine the lives of Marissa and her friends would get darker as they get older, just as they did with Harry Potter. I think about all sorts horrible fates that wait for children who become adults while living on the streets.
Will there even be more Marissa stories? I know, it seems a strange question when the first book isn't even finished, but you know how much I love the story! And many other people love it too, and want to see Marissa's story continue. And as you know, if you don't take care of Marissa, she's going to have to fend for herself in my own imagination, which is a very crowded, very noisy and scary place.
However it was you came up with the scenery of the Brazilian street children, it is amazing. Small details, like the glass shards in their bare feet, and what they had to do for food helped to really bring all this to life.
But, oh, how terrifying that the kids were all shot at! Street patrolls who just are there to exterminate the children. It seems so awful that you just know it has to exist. But hilarious how Marissa was able to get away from them. "You're Samba dancers!. I laughed so hard, I almost forgot about the guns.
And Marissa, only weighing fifty pounds? She must be malnurished and underdeveloped! No wonder people think she's nine! She probably even looks younger than that, as small as she is. And probably why she still gets mistaken for a little boy at eleven!
Another pondering: Just how close are you to finishing the next chapter. You know that I will continue my 'harassment' of your review page until I get what I want!
Author's Response: I did quite a bit of reading on the homeless children of Brazil. You can find many articles by searching 'Brazil street kids'. Unfortunately the horrors in Marissa's story do exist in real life. The scene of police violence against the children I took from an event, the Candelária Massacre, which you can read about in Wikipedia or other sources. There is also a movie 'Pixote' about the lives of Sao Paulo street kids. I tried to be very descriptive to capture the desperate reality of the homeless child's life, and am happy that you feel I succeeded. Yes, there are years of Marissa stories in my head. The question is really if they will ever be written down. Let's see how 'Marissa and the Wizards' ends first.
Here is my second review in my series of social protest! Well, I am running out of ideas for drawing, so this is going to have to do for now.
Marissa has to be about one of my favorite characters on this site, so it is really killing me that you are depriving the world of such a wonderful story! And as I've said before, it is driving me so mad that I have even begun making up my own stories about Marissa in my own head, which should be enough reason for you to continue writing this story. Marissa doesn't like it in my head; there are Deer Women, fourteen-year-old felons, and Snape isn't dead. Please, for Marissa's sake, don't make her live in a world where Snape isn't six feet under! I thought she was your baby!
This story really does bring up an important point: just how many children in the wizarding world have been abandoned? And there aren't just street children in Brazil. There are many of them in Russia, Africa, Easter Europe, and even in the United States. And from a statistical standpoint, at least a few of them have to be witches or wizards.
Something else I have been curious about for some time: how much research have you done about Brazil in order to write this story? Have you ever been to Brazil? You describe it so well! How much of your story would you say is factual research and how much would you say is just out of your own imagination?
Another pondering, have you considered posting your story on other sites too? I've only found it on MNFF so far. Or do you have this story posted on other sites already, and I just don't know about it?
Alright, two reviews and my protest still continues. I am going to be keeping track of how many reviews it takes to make you write a new chapter. It could prove as future reference when I begin going through the Marissa DTs. And it will be useful to all your numerous other fans as well!
Author's Response: Yes, Marissa does belong in my head and not yours. Yours appears far too overcrowded. I did extensive reading on Brazil before beginning Marissa, using that wonderful tool the internet. So sadly I have only visited the Amazon virtually. I saved many articles and images of places, people, animals, and myths. All of the Sao Paulo locales are factual, except Miss Julieta's and Mercado Trocado. I tried to make these chapters as realistic as possible to capture Marissa's desperate life on the streets. Of course all that wizard school stuff in the later chapters I made up. I don't really know the exact location of the place. MNFF is the only site the story is on. Since it began here (and I like the people here) I felt I should keep it only at Mugglenet until it is finished. Maybe after that I will consider sending it out to a wider audience. I would also like to do some revisions to smooth it out a bit once all the the chapters are complete. Maybe a doctor could prescribe something to help the Marissa DTs, though I am unsure if you can convince one that it is a legitimate illness :). Thanks for your continued harassment.
Alright, since you refuse to update your story, I have decide to begin a new form of social protest. I am going to leave long, well thought out reviews of your story until you finally do finish that next chapter of yours!
I'm going to start with chapter one. I love the fact that the British Wizarding world and the Brazillian one are intertwined. I almost wonder if Marissa will become famous and someday she'll get to meet Harry Potter. Sure, they wouldn't be able to understand one another, but they could still have tea and biscuits (Does Marissa even like tea?). Maybe Professor Merrythought could serve as an interpreter. But now I'm just rambling, I believe. I think I read an article where it said Merrythought was really a canon name in the series. Did you take it from that? Or did you make it up first, and then learn about that later?
I always wondered if all that inbreeding in the Wizarding world would come back to bite them in the arse! But then again, why is it affecting Muggle-borns as well? Is it some sort of curse? Great, now I'm obsessing! This is what happens when you don't update your stories!
And I'm not even done yet!
Just how many schools are there out there that use the quill system. I have been busy pondering that for some time now. In one of my stories, what I have come up with is a system where they cast a charm over the acceptance letters so that it could find a certain sender with specific specifications (find a nine-year-old American Muggle-born), and then they just keep sending out these letters until there is eventually no one else they can possibly be sent to and just start coming back. What are some of the other ways you imagine magical births can be tracked?
Also, where is this Delphi school? I'm going to guess Greece or Italy, but I suppose since this story is also about Brazil, it could also be Portugal. Well, which is it?
So how old is Professor Merrythought anyway? I don't believe that you ever really let us in on that fact. Also, who is this Angelica friend? Will we be seeing her in the story, or have we seen her already and just don't know it? Does this Angelica have a last name that we might recognize?
It's wonderful to reread the whole story again, but that doesn't mean I don't want to see some new chapters up soon. It also doesn't mean I won't continue with my form of social protest until I get what I want, because I'm an American and that's what makes this country great! Of course, you know I am teasing you, right? The America bit, not about wanting new chapters. I want those very much still.
I also invite anyone else who wants to see new chapters of Marissa to join me in my form of social protest by leaving very long, very well thought out reviews, one after the others.
Author's Response: Well, I guess I can answer some questions since I refuse to update my story :). 'Does Marissa even like tea?' She would probably prefer glitter juice. 'Did you take the Merrythought name from the series?' Yes, purposely. Galatea Merrythought was the Defense Against the Dark Arts Professor in Tom Riddle's time at Hogwarts. Our Professor Merrythought is her granddaughter. 'Why is the decrease in Wizarding population affecting Muggle-borns as well?' Um... that's the mystery of the story. I certainly can't answer that yet. 'Just how many schools are there out there that use the quill system?' Hogwarts of course has a magic Quill. Dumbledore's portrait lists the other five schools that have a Quill when Professor Flitwick asks where the letters about the population decrease are to be sent. Way up in Chapter 12, Katupya explains to Principal Absencia that there is one Quill school on each continent. Since J.K. Rowling never really specified, for the purpose of my story these Quills record magical births for all the continent, not only that school. Birth records for other countries are forwarded to their wizarding schools, so essentially I view all schools using the quill system, but only a special six that possess Quills. 'What are some of the other ways you imagine magical births can be tracked?' The way I imagine magical births to be tracked is a core aspect of Marissa and the Wizards that many other things will intertwine with. As such, I can't say anything about that yet :). 'Also, where is this Delphi school?' The Delphi school is in Delphi, Greece. Being in Europe, the Hogwarts Quill would record magical births for that school also (by this story's interpretation of Quills). 'So how old is Professor Merrythought anyway?' 26. 'Also, who is this Angelica friend?' I'm going to let you figure that out. It may be in the other chapters somewhere. Thanks for the questions, Molly! I'm also a bit disappointed that I haven't finished the next chapter yet. Can I join the social protest?
enjoying this story a lot!
I noted once before that waiting for this story to evolve has renewed my 'waiting for book 7' angst. I have all these threads dangling in my head and I can't wait to bring them along and tie them together. Both of us, my wife and I, probably check into look for the next installment 3 times a day, every day. The character development and imagery is truly excellent. I wouldn't structure the chapters the way you do, they seem to just accumulate various elements until you run out of space. Its all wonderful story telling, it just seems to be coming on in a random revelation. Re-reading the whole story allowed me to just ignore the divisions and just enjoy the flow of the story, which is proably why waiting for new chunk seems like such a lurching process. I really appreciate the depth and complexity you are showing in the story. It is just very difficult to wait, even for something so well done. Dr. Preecs
An intreging and powerful story with great character development. Looking forwardto additional updates.
Author's Response: Hello new reader! Thank you for your review. I hope to have a new chapter up very soon and would be happy to hear your comments again.
I admit that Marissa's adventures are planned out further than just this story, so not every plotline will be tied up neatly at the end (some will just be tangled up unneatly).
So there WILL be more Marissa stories! You said there would be; I read it! Oh, today is a happy, happy day, as an artist and a fan both! I just want more, and I want it now!
Great chapter as usual!
I just knew the instant you gave Marissa the first weird bird dream... She was this special bond with the baby macaw right? Maybe she's a mesomorph... Or something like that. I wonder, will she be wise and come to Merrythought about it?
Doubtful...
That's awesome! I'm quite sure it'll come in handy in the future... And I have the feeling she'd be at least a decent flier, if her teacher was an aceptable PERSON, let alone teacher!
I'm utterly curious about Anna's story. I'm guessing his Dad was murdered, quite probably before her eyes... *shudders*
It's interesting to see Marissa is making more and more friends. And bonding more with them,
I had overlooked the detail... Not only it's a crappy wand, it also did not choose her!! I wonder, how could Merrythought overlook that crucial detail!? It's highly suspicious....
I like how Poff. Guerra holds her in such a high seteem. She is indeed a fighter!
Kudos for a great chap!
Author's Response: Thank you for your comments. Yes, Marissa has a special bond with the baby macaw that is an important part of the story (that's why he's been sitting on her shoulder in the story banner for three months before he was introduced). Soon Marissa will find what that bond leads to.
Definitely different. Still better than some I've started and didn't like at all. Maybe that's why there are less and less wizard children? Maybe she's going to be something else? She does seem to have an affinity with animals?
It definitely would be. Maybe that's why there are less and less wizard children being born? Hmmmnn
Maybe it's only Marissa's MageMart wand that's holding her back, but I think there is some other barrier she needs to overcome. I love her unique talent. ("Avian legilimency"?) Now the question is whether this is just a unique character trait of hers, or will it prove somehow crucial?
I also really like the added details about the Quills and the legend of Jaguating. Beyond Marissa's tale, you have a crisis affecting the entire wizarding world. I can't wait to see how Marissa figures into it, but will this really be resolved in one book, or are you planning more Marissa stories? :)
I like how Anna and Sakura are becoming distinct personalities, and of course now I am curious to learn Anna's full story. Potira's possessiveness (and jealousy of Marissa's bond with Flap-Flap) is cute, but could be trouble later. (Is it too early to start shipping Marissa and Tiquinho? Heheh.)
I really have no criticisms to offer about this chapter, other than a few typos. This remains my favorite story on MNFF, and I'll be eagerly awaiting the next chapter.
Author's Response: No criticisms but a few typos? Surely the person who gives the most thorough, objective excerpt critiques on the beta forums can find some poorly constructed sentences somewhere in my overlong chapters! I do think you give the best advice to all our developing writers (not that they always listen to it, of course). I admit that Marissa's adventures are planned out further than just this story, so not every plotline will be tied up neatly at the end (some will just be tangled up unneatly). Thank you for your review.
I do like this story. The kids are learning to work with and support each other. Now Marissa just needs to get that wand that tried to choose her and I'm betting she becomes a very powerful witch.
Author's Response: Or maybe she never becomes a witch and the story ends that way. Wouldn't that be quite different than the standard fics on the site? We'll have to wait and see. Thanks for your review.
Sorry to say, this going to be a review of nearly all questions once again. I'm sorry, but my Ravenclaw curiosity MUST be satisfied!
I know that you take great care in chosing names for your characters, you have said so many times. But what about Marissa? What's the story behind choosing her name? And don't try sidestepping it with the 'she's a street kid' argument. At the end of the day, YOU named her, so there had to be a reason.
And her little friends? Sakura is a flower name, so I can see you following in another one of J.K.'s traditions, but what about Anna and Rosaria? And where on earth did you find a resourse and native Amazon names?
Maybe I'm just fishing for more things to add to the Wiki, but so far, you have the best page on there, and I intend to keep it that way.
And does the female Head of Jaguar House have a name, or is she just some random girl?
Also, have you given any more thought to the Marissa one-shot where she stays at the village for Carnival? I don't think you would hear a single complaint.
Can't wait for the next chapter! More drawings to be made!
Author's Response: Strangely enough, the main character of the story I simply gave a common name, just as JK gave a common, no symbolic meaning, name to her main character. I did not want to make EVERY name be some play on words or metaphor, so others like Anna and Rosaria and all the street kids are also just standard names I picked. The female head of Jaguar House, Araci Uirapuru, is mentioned in chapter eight as performing the spell to color the first-years robes. Tupi, an Indian language, was once a lingua franca in Brazil when the first white explorers came, and I assumed it would be the language of the wizard tribes. There are a few websites with a small list of words which I drew from (though I'm quite sure some of my names may have inaccurate syntax). And as slow as I am finishing chapter twelve, you want me to distract myself with a one-shot? A few references to her time there will be scattered through the next chapters.
Not wanting to see people be hurt and believeing stealing is wrong and American middleclass values? That's not what the terrorists and the Soviets said!
Marissa is a street child; she eats out of the garbages, begs for coins, and owns one outfits, but that does not automatically make her an amoral criminal. The whole point of this story is a good kid who's heart is pure trying to rise above her circumstance. If she did not have this good side to her, who would see her as a hero? There would be no hope for her, so why read about her?
Besides, as far as the 'values', remember she does go to church about once a week and she speaks to the nuns. As a former Catholic schoolgirl, I can personally attest to how convincing they can be.
And I know a lot of people want to know happened when Marissa was in the village for Carnival. Perhapes you could make it a side story; a one-shot.
Hmmm. I'm only two chapters in, and I'll give it a few more, but Marissa - and the other street kids - are ringing false to me. Why are they letting a girl tell them what to do? Why does Marissa seem to have the attitudes and morals of a comfortably middle-class american? And how could she ever be naive enough to say "Stop hurting him, he didn't do anything to you!"
But the premise of the story is intriguing. I hope to leave some more positive reviews in later chapters.
Author's Response: Thank you for your comments, and its quite alright to not leave a 'more positive' review. I value anyone's criticism and impression of the story. Now how can I address the parts you question? Why do they let Marissa tell them what to do? Basically, the idea is that the boys have found by experience that she can get them out of trouble. If someone has helped me out of danger before, I will probably follow their lead when I'm in danger again, and begin to respect their advice in other ways. I believe most people act that way. Attitudes and morals of middle-class American? It seems you mean I should portray Marissa with no morals because she is poor. She should steal and be uncaring about hurting other people because of her situation. Yet often the poor can display strong morals. Take for example the civil rights marchers of the 1960's who fought for equality and justice. They were not comfortably middle-class Americans. How can she be naive? Well, first of all she is a child. Despite a little street smarts, that is the nature of children. And all children have an innate believe that they should not have something bad done to them if they have not done something bad. Perhaps in her stubborn naivete, Marissa has simply refused to learn that the real world works otherwise. Thank you for your comments and I hope to hear from you again.
Geee... Poot Asouby passed.. at least he had a long flight in the forest before that. But I'm afraid Marissa will be totalled. Hope the poor gir doesn't believe it's her faul... And she finds a new friend still featherless macaw friend... who apparently is as fiesty as old Asouby was.
BTW, lovely detail that of the guano gathering. It's a noble tradition and seems like a hell of a field trip. Very educational, too!
Constance's vision is more and more intriguing, especially after that encounter in the train and now it seems to match Marissa's 'inexistent' Boggart. I really hope she would open up at least to Merrythought.
I have a halfmind that stupid wand is what's keeping Marissa from doing proper magic, because she certainly is overflowing with it! Perhaps it's also that in such a protecter place her powers don't snap. After all, the times she did those amazing things either her friends of her were in danger...
On a side note, I've begun noticing the very funny and suitable last names you gave to your professors. I mean Esquecido is rather ironical for someone who should rememer dates, names, places and such. Then Guerra and Estalafala... hehehe! Lovely!!
Author's Response: Always nice to have a new reviewer. I'm glad you're enjoying Marissa's story and also noticed the character names. Of course only if you know the Portuguese translation do you see how blatant they are. J.K. Rowling was quite creative with her names, so I try to carry on the tradition. Strangely enough it wasn't until some time after choosing another professor's name that I found out what a 'merrythought' was, and how it could also be somewhat symbolic to the story.
Another beautiful chapter! This story is becoming so captivating that I can't sit still until the next chapter comes out. It's actually a little sad to think that it's eventually going to end. But we can always pester you into writing more stories about Marissa. You know we will.
I wonder why you didn't go into detail about the Indian village. You have a surprise coming as far as that goes, don't you? Okay, I'll play along.
It's nice to know that Mr. Palito is still alive. He's a wizard, isn't he? Is that why he taught Marissa how to read; because he knew she was a witch all along and he was trying to get her ready for Witness Stone. Maybe, if you write more stories, he will be the one to teach Marissa the Patronus Charm to keep the Dementors away from the street children. And it will be a macaw, won't it?
But I really need to stop asking questions in my reviews.
But her poor little birdy friend died! Oh, I always hate stories where the dog (or other meaningful animal companion) dies! That doesn't mean I'm going to stop reading of course!
I'm also working on your chapter art for chapter 11 and it should be up soon. I can't wait for chapter 12!
Author's Response: Maybe in losing one birdy friend she has found another. And what would Marissa's Patronus be? Of course no student knows that as a first-year, but we'll see what her future holds at the end of this story. You can't wait for chapter 12 and I can't wait for my chapter 11 artwork! Now who would I bet finishes first?
Definitely worth the wait.
Author's Response: Thank you for your review and your patience. I'll try to make next chapter's wait a little shorter.
Hah, I was right -- Marissa is the "girl who fears nothing"! I love how headstrong and yet compassionate she is. And I laughed at "Petrippitus ToadAlice."
There are always so many details in your long chapters that I don't feel I can do them justice just picking a few things to comment on. Marissa's continued frustration with wand-work, contrasted with her unique affinity for birds, promises to make her quite an unusual witch. I'm sure she'll learn to use a wand eventually, perhaps after finding that one that wanted her so much.
Somehow I don't see Cecilia's redecorating plans ending well.
While this chapter was another one with a lot of color and character interactions, there was just enough to remind us of the main plot thread you've been hinting at, like Constanca's ominous vision.
I thought the time Marissa spent in the Jaguars' village was kind of rushed. It was really a pretty significant trip for her, and deserved more description. But this chapter was pretty long already.
Poor Asuoby, and poor Marissa. I'm sure Marissa has seen death before, but this may be the first time she's lost someone she really cared about.
This is my favorite story on MNFF. I always know when I get an update notice that there will be another long, beautiful chapter full of magical and touching moments.
Author's Response: I'm glad the details are appreciated, and of course leave it to you to pick up the little foreshadowings so easily. I thought the village was rushed too (a victim of bloated chapter syndrome), but Marissa will be recalling some things she learned there in future chapters. Thank you for all the comments.
