Reviewer: A H
Date: 09/13/08 4:07
Chapter: Chapter 1

I have never, in all my time reading (that'd be about my whole life) have I ever come across a style so magnificently original as yours. At first I was kind of daunted by the description that you use (it was almost overwhelming) but as I kept reading, it started to flow much better.

I guess I'm just not used to FANFREAKIGNTASTIC description.

Ahem.

What I loved most about this story was how you didn't use dialog or a lot of the character's thoughts to guide the reader. From description, scenery, and atmosphere alone, you created emotion and feeling. I didn't have to know Draco's immediate thoughts (i.e, what he thought was behind the curtain, why he was scared of the forest behind him, etc) to know his thoughts, if you get what I mean.

And another thing:

And yet he held back, for what was he but a fool in the dark?

This line was brilliant. You created the atmosphere for what lied behind - where he is trapped - and what he could not reach, and then made the meaning clear with this. It was clever and just... brilliant.

Personally I think this would've made an amazing one shot, but you've definitely got a hooked reader if it's going to be continued.

And you're amazing, if I didn't mention that.

Arianna

Reviewer: Elf01
Date: 06/06/08 3:54
Chapter: Chapter 1

I like your description, and the premise of the fic. I'm not so keen on the poetry, but that is just me and nothing to do with your writing.

Author's Response: Thanks! I'm glad you liked it! The poetry just happened, and the poem that I wrote, as the song, I admit was simply awful, but I can't write songs to save my life! Originally I had the work of another author, but I thought it would be better being all my own work, even if the song isn't as good. Thanks for reviewing! xx Take care Chicky.

You must login (register) to review.
Information
Find out everything you need to know about the site right here.


We have stories and authors in this archive.

:

RSS
Choose Theme:
SOCIAL MEDIA
     
MOST RECENT
Unexploded Bombs by Oregonian 1st-2nd Years
Dudley Dursley has just experienced the death of his elderly father Vernon from...
Ginny's Big Decision by dg04 1st-2nd Years
After Dumbledore's Funeral, Harry tells Ginny that they can't be together anymore...
Little Lions by SexY_LydZ 6th-7th Years
On a stormy October evening, a letter, a late night trip to the library and...
FEATURED
Going Against Salazar's Grain by hestiajones 1st-2nd Years
"Sometimes," said Dumbledore, "we sort too soon." Originally writtten for...
Whispers in the Night by lucca4 6th-7th Years
"Swear to me, Cissy. Swear you won't tell." It's a secret, and it haunts...
Fear and Loathing in Florida (Mostly Loathing) by minnabird 3rd-5th Years
Scabior and Greyback had to escape the Aurors somehow - they just hadn't expected...
Just Before Healing by WeasleyMom 3rd-5th Years
With Hannah, things always go to yellow.
In Bloom by ToBeOrNotToBeAGryffindor 3rd-5th Years
It figures that he ignores the other side of roses. Thorns fit to draw blood...
Magical by Nagini Riddle 1st-2nd Years
Ginny and her brothers sneak down the stairs to look at presents, but instead...
CATEGORIES