That was really rather brilliant.
Gellert was very well done, and for all that it matters, I liked his character best. I guess Albus did too. 'Golden Lucifer' is a particularly apt description of the young Grindelwald, and what he meant to Albus; it was easy to sympathize with Albus, understand his fascination while comprehending the flaws of both. I definitely teared up at the end, when Albus puts out a hand and Gellert runs away.
I didn't really remember the fight, though. I thought Aberforth had instigated the fight somehow. Agh, when I get back to my dorm I'll have to go reread that part.
Oh, yeah, I should say I thought Aberforth was good too--especially in terms of his relationship to Arianna for the little bit you showed it, tying the ribbon in her hair and crying over her body. It was really moving, very tragic...
Excellent story! Good luck!
Author's Response: 'Really rather brilliant'? Squee, man! Thanks. That's not what I was expecting.rnrnYeah, I do like the title. I thought of it afterwords and then put that line in the story. *shifty look*rnrnI have a particular penchant for Aberforth as well. It looked to me that he had a soft spot for his sister, judging by DH.rnrnThanks again!
Even though this is Slash, which I don't usually read, I found this to be a great story with amazing descriptions.
He was gone; he was gone for good, and all Albus had of him were the feel of his lips and the look of his hair and the glint in his eyes and too many worthless promises. I really love this line, because it gives an excellent description of Albus's feelings. All of the romantic notions (his lips, his hair, and his eyes) are nicely interrupted by the sad fraction of his feelings (worthless promises).
All of the gold and yellow sprinkled throughout was brilliant, as well. I really enjoyed looking for that colour while I was reading.
One thing: Albus’ knuckles rapped one, two, three times on the hard wooden door. It should technically have an 's' after the apostrophe because 'Albus' is a singular noun. There's a couple other places where that was, but I'm too lazy to find them all. =P
My favourite part was when Ariana was killed. I love that you stayed true to canon and made it so that either Albus OR Gellert could have killed her. The bit about Albus ducking to avoid the Killing Curse was also nicely placed because that would have added to his guilt over her death later in life.
All in all, this was a fantastic story. Great job! =]
Author's Response: KATIE!rnrn*glomp in return*rnrnThank you! I'm glad you liked it. I tried to get a lot of 'stuff' in there, and though I may have rushed and crammed it to the point of melodrama-ness, I think I still 'like' it.rnrnI got a few typos in there. One funny one (I'm not sure if I've changed it yet) is at the end, when Aberforth goes and holds Arianna's body, it says that he was 'holding her in his eyes...'. Whoops!rnrnThanks again for the long review, Katie. rnrn-Stubby
i like this fic even though it was slash. it was sad and well written. I especially liked the last line:
He was gone; he was gone for good, and all Albus had of him were the feel of his lips and the look of his hair and the glint in his eyes and too many worthless promises.
This conveys his sadness at him leaving and even though I don't usually read slash this was very good. thank you for writing.
Author's Response: Thanks a lot for my first review on this fic. I'm glad that it conveyed the emotion- I was afraid that it might have been lost in the bad characterisation of Dumbledore. Thanks again!