Wow, that was a really great story. I loved how you could see Alice's thoughts become clearer, and the ending was very touching. Also, I thought it was clever how you called Neville the Earth Child. Nice work!
Author's Response: Thanks. I somehow always pictured Neville as an Earth Child-- his natural talent to nourish growing things, maybe, or his love for the soil. Anyway... thanks again! ~Fauna
Hi Steph! This was a wonderful story.
I especially liked the Alice POV, it was really deep and well described. The story was very touching, when I read Alice’s memory I couldn’t help, but to feel disgust and sad, like it was something that had really happened. The way you wrote Bellatrix, was pure brilliance. You manage to keep her perfectly IC and really show us why people think of her as the most evil of the dark Lord’s servants. I haven’t been as good as you and read all the submissions, unfortunately, but I really think this have a big chance to win.
I can’t find anything that I don’t like about this story. (Maybe the fact that Neville also named his daughter after his parent, but that is only a matter of taste.)
Good luck ;)
Author's Response: Thanks Johan! Great to have your opinion, especially since I think your story is great too! The 'Claws are rocking the Challenge so far. Oh, and about the name thing, I agree. You see, I would never personally name a kid after a parent. But Neville seemed the kind of guy who would do that. Thanks again! ~Fauna
Awww that was sad/cute/suspense/EVERYTHING!!!! I liked it though, it had a nice ending too, very well written:) Great job:) 2nd?
Author's Response: Thank you, and thank you for being so loyal to my stories. Your reviews make me smile. I am not sure what you meant by 2nd. This is a one shot, if that is what you are asking. ~Fauna
This story was so powerful! I especially liked all the metaphors, with the glass and the earth and the leaf, and your sentences flowed easily. I'm glad there was a happy ending to Alice Longbottom's life. Keep writing!
Author's Response: Thank you, Calico. I am glad you liked the metaphors; I was afraid they might be too heavy-handed.rnrnAs always, it means a lot to read a review. You have brightened my day!rn~Faunarnrn