Reviewer: jkjim
Date: 03/02/10 22:40
Chapter: Chapter 14- Damsel in Distress

I think you misinterpreted my previous review. When I was referring to the two sadists, I was talking about Potter and Black. I don't think people like that can ever "mature," and although they may learn enough self control to function in polite society, deep down, they will always be as depraved as they were in their youth.

Author's Response: You're right, I did-- thanks for the clarification. Who knows about James Potter, but there doesn't seem to be any indication that Sirius ever outgrew his adolescent tendencies. Obviously Black and Snape hate each other as adults, but there's a big difference between hating someone who used to bully you, and hating someone you used to bully as part of a tag-team. You probably have a point about people not outgrowing that kind of thing-- I can think of only two guys from my high school who were really obvious bullies, and these days, they're both in jail (surprise). I have always found the "James Potter was a bully who grew up in an astonishingly short period of time into a wonderful person" thing to be a really weak link in the canon.

Reviewer: Minerva67
Date: 03/02/10 16:00
Chapter: Chapter 14- Damsel in Distress

Great to see you have posted another chapter. Lily is finally coming to admit that he might be reforming. I am distrubed that she is so unconcerned that Severus coould be seriously injured or killed if he is not warned immediately, just sothat she can be "sure" that is is sincere enough to suit her. I must admitt hat I had to read it several times to begin to figure out why Severus would go down to the Care of Magical creatures grounds diguised as Llily---he certainly wouldn't want to have the Junior Death-Eaters supect Lily as the saboteur! He certainly takes steps to protect Geoff O. when he uses polyjuice before in Chap 12. Hope you explain the amiguities in Chap 13----and what happened to Llewelyn? The authorities must be clueless and gutless to stand by during the attacks on Muggle-borns. Much like the thirties during the rise of Hitler, Mussolini, Stalin, the Ku Klux Klan, and now other assorted dictators and terrorists. Post Chap 15 as soon as you can.

Author's Response: My underlying assumption (which may or may not be correct) is that the junior Death Eater types may harass or bully those who don't agree with them, but that they're not going to do serious harm to a half-blood who might actually serve a purpose-- they're at the stage where they are bullies, but not killers (yet). Think Draco before the assassination attempt on Dumbledore-- his activities with Crabbe and Goyle, stomping on Harry's nose, that kind of thing-- and that's what I was going for. The authorities at Hogwarts in Harry's time seem either oblivious to a lot that is going on, or willfully ignorant, and the students regularly take matters into their own hands, so I'm assuming that little has changed. Severus and Lily, just like Harry, are doing things by themselves rather than getting the faculty involved. As for him going down there disguised as Lily-- it's because he can't help himself. He has an excuse, and he's been wanting to do this for months. Plus, he is more concerned about the profs catching him than his roommates, because so far he has eluded the roommates pretty well. More about the Llewellyn plot in chapter 15, and I hope that clarifies it a bit-- of course, it's all clear in my head because I'm writing it, so it's useful to know what comes off as a bit fuzzy. :)

Reviewer: dominiqueweasley
Date: 03/01/10 22:52
Chapter: Chapter 1- The End of the World

I'm really liking this story... it's more plot based than romance based, which is a nice change. Plus I love Snape (of course).

Loved the latest chapter- Lily was well written and I liked your interpretation of Reg. Anyways, update soon please!

Author's Response: Thanks so much for the review-- glad you're enjoying it. I'm getting close to finishing chapter 15, but real life keeps intervening. :) As for plot vs. romance-- I guess I find that it takes a great deal of plot to bring Lily even remotely close to falling for him, and to make him into someone she could actually fall in love with. They're great characters (thanks to JKR)-- it's fun tweaking with their destiny a bit. :)

Reviewer: jkjim
Date: 03/01/10 22:04
Chapter: Chapter 14- Damsel in Distress

For the most part, it was a good update, although I do think you could have transitioned a little better from the last chapter. I like how you included an encounter between the polyjuiced Lily, and the two sadists (they're too old to be considered bullies). I'm really looking forward to seeing where you take this now that some of Severus' extracurricular activities are out in the open.

Author's Response: I know what you mean about the transition from the last chapter-- that's the problem with writing it from both of their points of view. It does switch a bit dramatically every now and again. And of course, I'm kind of covering a lot of ground, because even if they do manage to wind up together, I don't think that can happen overnight. I think Severus's problem with these guys is that he honestly used to be on their side, except for Lily. I'm sure there were people in Slytherin who weren't planning on joining the Death Eaters but who just stayed below the radar, but that's not an option for him. Plus, he's stuck living with them. Thanks for continuing to read and review it, by the way-- much appreciated.

Reviewer: dandy_like_a_lion
Date: 03/01/10 19:11
Chapter: Chapter 14- Damsel in Distress

YAY!!! Your back! And with an excellent chapter, might I add. Hope there'll be more soon!
I especially love the whole senario of the chapter-long live beautiful irony!

Author's Response: Thanks so much-- I figured the two potions geniuses had to mess around with Polyjuice sometimes. Glad you enjoyed the irony of the whole thing. :) More to come soon-- I'm working on it-- sorry it's taking so long!

Reviewer: chikako
Date: 03/01/10 17:07
Chapter: Chapter 14- Damsel in Distress

aawwww yay! lily finally talks to him again!! or well, she almost talks to him...hehe... hm...whatever happened to the DADA teacher? (i can't ever spell his name XD) i really really liked lily's thoughts of how if it was just the 2 of them, they were best friends but with everyone else, they threaten their friendship. *fingers crossed that they get together* update soon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Author's Response: I know-- it took fourteen chapters to get to that point. :) Fifteen, I guess, given that he's not exactly conscious in this one. Well, in the canon she never spoke to him again for the remaining 5 or 6 years of her life, so I'm guessing she really would require some persuading. Glad you're liking it, and thank you. :)

Reviewer: Sariana
Date: 02/28/10 23:02
Chapter: Chapter 14- Damsel in Distress

Oh, it was a Cinderella allusion, right? As Severus would say, I'm a dunderhead. Sorry.

Author's Response: You're definitely not a dunderhead-- I reread it, and I can see how that could be confusing. I edited it just now and tacked on a little extra to the Cinderella allusion to make it clear-- thanks for pointing that out. :)

Reviewer: Sariana
Date: 02/28/10 23:01
Chapter: Chapter 14- Damsel in Distress

Oh, I thought it said something about having until the clock struck midnight???

Author's Response: Thanks for pointing out that this was confusing. :)

Reviewer: Sariana
Date: 02/28/10 22:07
Chapter: Chapter 14- Damsel in Distress

Yay! An update to one of my favorite stories! I was thinking of your story just a few days ago and wondering howit was progressing. I was so happy to see the update notice in my inbox. One nitpick, though: Polyjuice Potion lasts only an hour, not a full day.

I love Mary's line about how the two are eejits always getting her in trouble and why they must be friends. And your portrayal of Sirius and Regulus's relationship feels just right.

Author's Response: But wait, it did last only an hour! :) Now I have to explain. :) I packed a lot into that hour, but my idea of it was: He hears about the plot when his roommates return in the early morning, he figures he needs to go in disguise to undo the damage his roommates have done, Lily (inadvertently tipped off by Regulus the night before) gets up early and follows him, he heads off to an unused classroom to transfigure and sneaks out because he suspects he's being followed, she loses him but Mary sees him (as Lily) heading out of the building, they go get Lily's stash of Polyjuice and (yep) one hair from the "best friends" token thing they did when they were kids (chapter 3!), and Lily heads out and looks around the grounds, encounters Avery, etc.-- arriving back at the castle in time for breakfast to let out. Just a very busy hour in the morning. :) The Polyjuice lasts only long enough for her to get him to the Hospital wing and confess to Madame Pomfrey, which is why she's in such a big hurry to get past Potter and Black-- she has a good idea of about when he took it, since she was following him, and she knows they're down to mere minutes. Does that make sense? Glad you liked the Sirius and Regulus relationship-- that's just always how I pictured them. OK, now to get cracking on chapter 15-- back to Severus's POV.

Reviewer: Charles Sinclair
Date: 02/18/10 19:27
Chapter: Chapter 13- Half Empty

Both characters points of view contained in a single chapter. A significant structural moment.

I am utterly baffled at the Mary/Severus interlude. Is Lily being obsessively paranoid? A streak of odd extremism seems to be shared.

Author's Response: Yes, I included both of them on purpose. :) Good pick-up there. As for the Mary/Severus interlude-- Lily has (in my take on it, anyway) fancied him off and on for years, and she only knows part of the story, and she's mad at herself that all he seems to have to do to get her attention is pay attention to her friend and win a showdown with another guy. To be explained soon. Really. I know it's a bit weird.

Reviewer: jkjim
Date: 01/11/10 17:04
Chapter: Chapter 13- Half Empty

Great update, I found the love potion theory very amusing. I can't wait to see where you take this. I also like how you are emphasizing how taking a stand has forced Snape to be much more wary of his roommates.

Author's Response: Obviously you've caught on to the fact that Lily's POV is incomplete. :) And I thought that, realistically, he had to have a hard time with his roommates any time he sided with Lily. I can't imagine that every year in Slytherin was like this-- presumably some of them were ambitious in other ways, trying to prove themselves or succeed in some field or make money or rise in society or whatever-- but we know he had such friends from the canon, so I figured that those would be his roommates. By the way, I just submitted Ch. 14, finally-- sorry about the delay!

Reviewer: chikako
Date: 01/02/10 11:34
Chapter: Chapter 13- Half Empty

OMG!!! FINALLY!!!! i was checking this eery day since you replied to my review for the last chapter >.

Author's Response: I finally just submitted Chapter 14-- sorry, I've been so busy. If it's approved, it should be up soon. :) Thanks for the patience!

Reviewer: NoxSomnium
Date: 01/02/10 10:41
Chapter: Chapter 13- Half Empty

New Chapter!=so excited. I thought a Lily pov was interesting. She is not necessarily full of herself; I think it's more that she's taken Severus' affection for granted for so long that she came to see it as her due, so she hasn't figured out yet that it is not a fact of life that he will have only her to depend on and see as important in his life. If that makes any sense.

I don't mind that you made this chapter more Llewellyn plot oriented-it was rather exciting and mysterious. I felt that it was maybe a little rushed to get to those parts. Which is to say that the opening seemed rushed as if the Valentines events had to be in there but were being summarized to get past them and to the main part of the chapter. I found it a little hard to follow because it seemed like there is this very small mention of a fight and Severus seeming to flirt with Mary but Mary is actually a little upset with him because he's giving her the cold shoulder. Why then is it that from Severus pov he is avoiding Mary but from Lily's pov they're spending more time together?

I may not be making any sense.
What I am trying to say is that the beginning seemed a little rushed and disconnected within itself and with the rest of the chapter. Which is entirely intended to be Constructive Criticism. I liked it and was thrilled you updated and entirely failed to pack like I'm supposed to be doing, I simply thought of something that might maybe make it a little better ;). Llewellyn and were-creature/monsters... dun dun duuuun!

Author's Response: Hello-- I tried to respond a while back, and I see that it didn't post. I agree that she takes his affection as her due and has done so for a long time. I'm taking the point of view that over the course of this year, as he has improved in her regard, she has started to miss his devotion even though at the same time she finds it to be a weight upon her. As for the shift from Lily's POV to Severus's-- sorry it seems a bit rushed, but Lily doesn't know everything that is going on. To be explained later, basically. I was trying to get a few things out that will be explained later, and also to update on how Lily feels about him at this time. Hope that helps a bit. And I've finally posted chapter 14, so if it gets approved, it should be up fairly soon. Thanks for sticking with it.

Reviewer: Sariana
Date: 01/02/10 0:30
Chapter: Chapter 13- Half Empty

Hmm, I thought Severus WAS a member of the Slug Club (based on that scene at Slughorn's Christmas party in HBP--why else would Severus even BE at that party? I never understood that. But I digress.). Did you intentionally change that part of the history, or do you disagree with my interpretation? (Not a criticism, just curious!)

So, did Sev run into Mary on purpose? If so, why? Lily obviously is overanalyzing the situation, but is she wrong about Sev's intentions here? Or have I just forgotten something, because I also can't remember why Severus "owes" Mary something.

Know what would be really funny? If Severus gives up on Lily (willingly), ends up with someone else (Mary or Other), doesn't become a DE & has a happy life, someone else passes along the prophecy, and Harry dies with his parents. Okay, not funny. But then Severus could defeat Voldy and get to be the hero!

I am intrigued by the additional information about Llewellyn. I knew there was something dark about him--still don't know what, though.

On a side note, I saw the term "tripping the light fantastic" in the paper yesterday and thought of you (and NoxSomnium).

Thought I certainly wish you could update more frequently, I am not about to abandon your story. I can't always review right away, but I am always excited to see an update. Thanks for a great story!

Author's Response: Funny, I always imagined he was there in HBP because he was faculty, but that he had not been a member of the Slug Club as a student-- I guess I sort of imagined that in the somewhat unfair world of teacher favoritism, he and Lily were equally talented at Potions, but she was charming and pretty and vivacious whereas he was... not, and that therefore he didn't make it. Also, after he murders Dumbledore, Slughorn says something like, "But I taught him..." in bewilderment, and I couldn't help but think that Slughorn would have claimed him as one of his Slug Club members either then ("But he was in the Slug Club...") or earlier ("And now he's faculty here!" or something like that) if he had been one. There are things that get answered in future chapters, so I'll remain quiet about them at this point. :) But sometimes when I'm writing this, I wonder what would happen if his quest for Lily led him to other friends in his life, and away from the DE's, and to some kind of happiness with someone else even minus Lily, so I can see your point entirely. Sometimes I think this needs to have two alternate endings. :) I KNEW "tripping the light fantastic" must still be out there somewhere! :) Thank you! OK, I will submit chapter 14 this week, so believe it or not, I am actually updating quickly this time. And thank you for the review! They are always fun to read. :)

Reviewer: dandy_like_a_lion
Date: 01/01/10 23:41
Chapter: Chapter 13- Half Empty

It get's better and better with ever chapter!!!

Author's Response: Thank you-- glad you like it! There will be more soon. :)

Reviewer: Iva1201
Date: 11/24/09 13:47
Chapter: Chapter 12- Yet Another Thing to Hide

I am impressed - wonderful story, really. (-: I would have surely noticed it sooner, but I mostly read fics only at fanfiction.net, so it escaped my attention previously. But I am VERY happy to have found it here. (-: I checked and you don't seem to have account at fanfiction but if you ever decide to publish there, this piece goes immediately to Severus Snape archive we have there. (-:

I have to say that I really like Prof. Llewellyn and Mary MacDonald in this - and yes, one only wishes that Severus would impress "his girl" with his actions. I only fear that she is by now blinded by her golden Potter. ))))-:

Author's Response: Thanks very much for the invitation, and I'm glad you like it. :) Prof. Llewellyn and Mary are my two favorite OC's to write, obviously, which is why they show up so much. Lily is an interesting one to try to figure out, though-- I have another chapter from her POV coming up. Thanks for reading and reviewing-- I'm not updating as frequently as I'd like, but there will be another chapter soon.

Reviewer: Charles Sinclair
Date: 11/16/09 23:13
Chapter: Chapter 12- Yet Another Thing to Hide

Thank you for continuing with this. You can write, and what you have to say is interesting. Your manner of expression enhances the scope of the HP related world rather then diminishing it to plot driven events. I suppose the million dollar question now is whether you can engage the emotions in characters and a plot that readers aren't familiar with. Part of what is emotionally satisfying in this story is the atonement like sense of experiencing a reprieve for anothers' suffering. Though there are variety of interesting puzzles in getting a catharsis on behalf of a fictional character!

Llewllyn continues to be his wonderfully enigmatic self. Reminds me of Dumbledore. He's certainly one tainted, though whether this is more from suffering or evil is unclear. May it long remain thus.

p.s. Carrying on a earlier thread by ...to my mind, 'Triping the light fantastic' does make sense put in reference to the great ball. I can't understand what action beyond dancing a person could draw out of this. Tobias Snape's bookshelf, described as a tattered collection of cheap paperback classics or suchlike furthermore puts Severus in position to access to this kind of a literary work. Whether he would is a moot point, on which I oscillate. On the one hand, he faces a dire shortage of activities and a abundance in hours. On the other, it may be going a bit far to portray even an intelligent teenager brooding over some great works of poetry. Why not give him a goblet of wine, rename him Bryon and be done with it all?

Author's Response: Thank you, as always, for your thoughtful reviews-- I think it's fairly safe to say that Severus Snape is the most complex character in the HP universe, and I'm trying to craft a different fate for him while still doing justice to that complexity. And I believe that Lily, if she could have been his friend all those years and if JKR isn't talking a load of nonsense when she says that Lily could have fallen in love with Severus if he hadn't pursued the Dark Arts and become a Death Eater, can't be as one-dimensional as she (unfortunately) sometimes seems (even, at times, in the canon). Good point about tripping the light fantastic-- you know, I've heard it bandied about so much that I think he could have picked it up from a somewhat classically educated parent or Muggle novels of a certain era or even just TV announcers trying to be clever. :)

Reviewer: galrandielNayalo
Date: 10/29/09 16:46
Chapter: Chapter 1- The End of the World

really interesting chapter.
usually I don't read much romance fanfics, especially severus-lily ones, but this one keeps me reading. funny, captivating, and well written. I'll wait for your next chapter ^_^
oh, and I really like the way your portray snape.

Author's Response: Thanks so much-- I'm glad you like it even though the genre isn't your favorite. :) If it gets approved, the next chapter should be up some time soon. Real life definitely intervenes.

Reviewer: chikako
Date: 10/18/09 12:35
Chapter: Chapter 9- An Impossible Position

waaah! i really really would love to read snape's POV of this game!!!!

Author's Response: Sorry-- it was hard enough to write Lily's! :) That chapter took me forever because I find it REALLY hard to write Quidditch!!! :)

Reviewer: chikako
Date: 10/16/09 20:13
Chapter: Chapter 12- Yet Another Thing to Hide

omg omg omg this is a awesome fic!!! ^__^ i love snape and how he changes so much for the better and makes more friends because lily left him instead of just wallowing in self pity or getting pissed and joining the DE. really like Llewellyn ^_____^ haha...the way things are going, i'm hoping snape doesn't end up together with lily. not liking her much now *chirps*

anyway, update soon!!! *hoping this isn't abandoned or something*

Author's Response: Thanks again. :)

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