This was good! I think you described a Muggle-born's feelings at Hogwarts really well, good job!
Oh! I really liked this. It was very well written, and you did an amazing job with portraying Lily's character. =) You could actually feel how nervous she was about flying, and you could actually picture what she must have looked like to the Marauders. Very well done.
I don't think I even found any mistakes in this at all. The only thing that did stand out a bit was the way that Remus was acting. It was a completely different view of him than anyone else has ever shown. Usually people show him as the quiet one, the one who doesn't join in on any of the mocking and whatnot. The way you showed him is how I see him to be. He wasn't as rude and arrogant as James and Sirius, but he wasn't really quiet either. He wasn't really making fun of Lily like James and Sirius would have done and all that. You actually showed him being a part of the group instead of showing him as being off to the side with a book (which a lot of people do, and it bothers me a bit).
I also think that you got Sirius and James's character spot on. The way that they were acting is exactly how I would picture them to be if something like that happened. It kind of felt like they were trying to make Lily feel better about flying, but instead they just made it worse. Which I liked. Sure they were pretty much jerks in school, but the way I see it.. they wouldn't really be jerks 24/7. I see them as only doing it when they felt that they should? I guess that's what I mean. Basically, I think they would only do it if they knew that people were watching them and all that.
Honestly, love. This was one of the better stories I have read on the archives. You are an amazing writer, and I really loved how you showed all of the characters' personalities and such in such a short story. Very well written. I loved it! Keep up the fabulous work.
Author's Response: Thanks! As far as Remus goes, I just like to think that while he was the most serious of the four, he could still take part in their mischief. :) I'm glad you liked the rest of their characterizations! Thanks so much for reviewing! :D
Poor Lily. I can just imagine James, Sirius, Remus and Peter acting like that. Good job, I really enjoyed this fic.
Author's Response: Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it. And yes, poor Lily! Eleven year old boys are not always the most pleasant. ;D Thanks for reading!
I loved this!=]
Aw, I wish I could fly! XD
Author's Response: I'm glad you liked it! I would love to fly, too! ;)
Wow! Nice story! i enjoyed reading it. Hope u continue to wite such awesome Marauder fics!
Author's Response: Thanks! :D
awww, I love little lily! not enough stories out their with little lily, james ,sirius etc. great characterization!
Author's Response: Haha, Lily and the little Marauders were a lot of fun to write. Thanks!
That was a short, smooth, feel-good fic, and just what I needed. Thanks! :)
Author's Response: Glad you liked it! Thanks for reviewing. :)