You have yet again given an interesting, intriguing, and captivating tale of Oliver Wood. I just adore your characterization of him. You take him so much farther than the Quidditch obsessed Keeper we all love, and I adore it. I wrote this as I read so it starts with chapter one and ends with chapter four.
The first chapter was outstanding. I liked the way you described his emotions. And the map is so annoying that it really allows the reader to identify with Oliver’s annoyance. It’s great! I also liked the addition of Alice. She seems sweet and is so cute. She adds more importance and danger to Oliver’s mission, not to mention, it was just an amazing twist.
“Oh great,” Oliver exclaimed, handling the small object in his palm. “Just bloody fantastic. If I got here through this, then I can be anywhere at any time.”
This was my favorite part in chapter one. It was just so perfectly Oliver! His personality really came through with this line.
Chapter two is so… angsty! I can’t believe that Alice was kidnapped, and that Harvey is a raging alcoholic, sorry “functioning alcoholic”! Again, I love your characterization of this anxious, agitated, and slightly fearful Oliver. Something about his protectiveness of Alice makes me wonder though. I can’t seem to put a finger on what it might be, but it makes me wonder how he and Remus are such good pals.
“What’s that?” Alice asked as she tried to get her hands around the folded parchment that she had seen in his pocket, either oblivious or indifferent to the fact that Oliver was now squirming uncomfortably at the feel of her hands on his rear.
This was so sweet! It was so something a little kid would do without realizing it, and Oliver’s reaction is priceless. I also must add that I don’t like this Enoch character; he seems mighty shady.
What can I say about chapter three? It’s one heck of a ride, that’s what! You kept me on my toes wanting more, and never once seeing what was coming next. It is quite difficult to write something this unpredictable and I applaud you for it. I like the way that you have now set Enoch and Oliver on the same side, still divided but together. It is so intriguing! Poor Alice, she must have been terrified.
The ending of this story was pure brilliance. The way that everything really turned out to be nothing, but the “joker” had been defeated, was just spectacular. I loved the way that Alice bit him too. This chapter was just spectacular.
Olivia, you have made a wonderful story out of this Gauntlet submission. I would be in no way surprised if you didn’t place. You’re story is comprehensive and fits the prompts together so well that you could not possibly recognize this as a Gauntlet if you hadn’t participate or knew before hand. Amazing, brilliant, and outstanding job. I truly loved this fic.
Hugs from your beta-ee,
Author's Response: *blushes* Thank you so much Haylee! *huggles* I'm glad you liked it. Writing this has been such a thrill and challenge, so it's good to know my efforts weren't in vain!:) Thank you for taking the time to review. I appreciate it! -Olivia
Hmm... this story is really good. The ending was a little bit of a let down though.
Author's Response: I'm glad you liked it! Sorry the ending was a let down for you. I knew this story would generate a lot of questions after it was done. Thanks for reviewing, I appreciate it.
*GASP* I need to find out what happens! I simply must! This story rocks! I love Oliver fics! Please write more! Soon! Or I may die!
Author's Response: I'm so glad you like it! I'm a huge Oliver fan as well. Lucky for you, this is for the gauntlet, so the whole story will be finished by Friday. Thank you so much for the review! I really appreciate it.
I really like this fic so far! I'm going to read the next chapter now. Reveiw again in a few!