It is so said... but I absolutely loved it.
You made me cry! OMG, I love this story. That line...The only color I would ever let into my perfect monochrome world. The color that made sure my world remained monochrome...I just lost it. That was great. I am a huge Severus/Lily fan (though obviously they couldn't get together or no Harry Potter...) and you really touched my heart! Great job!
PS. I have one Sev/Lily fic posted, and I would love if you read it! TY!
I really like your fics, especially the one with the daydream charm! It was so great. You may like some of my S/L fics. Some are on here, but others are too short. They'll all be posted on my livejournal account.
That. Was. Beautiful.
Oh my gosh, I just about cried when I read that. It was poetic, it was romantic, it was...perfect! You write beautifully. Keep writing, please!
Wow, this was so good! I really like your style of writing, and I hope that you continue to use your talent to write more excellent stories! :)
Um, can I say, "Wwwwwooooooooww" ?! You've probably heard this a dozen times over, and will hear it a dozen times again, but it's like Severus Snape popped into your head and wrote this story himself. I'm absolutely floored. I'm definitely going to check out your other stuff. :)
The insight you give to this story...it's absolutely brilliant. The black, and the white, and the green...oh it's just so good. And the ending line? Wow, what a great way to pack a punch in. Also, I love your transitioning from present to past--and the way the POV changes with it. Usually I'm not an overly huge fan of changes of POV in the story (either between first and third person or between different characters), mainly because I find it difficult for myself and others to get it right. However, you most certainly did. It was just...gah. BRILLIANT.
I love how you developed Severus Snape as a character through the flashbacks. There is a noticeable difference in his personality in the first flashback and the last one. This can also be said about him while narrating in first person. His maturity level changes a lot throughout this story, depending on how old he is, and you nailed it, dead on.
Also--I loved the line: "The only color I would ever let into my perfect monochrome world. The color that made sure my world remained monochrome." It was so good! I read it, and literally said, "Aww," out loud. In my mind, he's saying Lily Evans was the only thing that made his world perfect, or close to it.
I used to be a hardcore Lily/James fan--ever since I first got into fanfiction about four years or so ago. And then DH came out, and changed my view completely. While of course I'm glad Lily ended up with James (otherwise--no Harry), but Lily/Severus will probably always be my OTP. So, this story does wonderful (and also terrible--in a good way) things to my heart.
I honestly can't stop gushing over this story. If anyone ever needs a good Severus fic--with a slightly Lily romance or otherwise--I'm definitely recommending you. You're phenomenal. Please, keep up the amazing work.
Have you ever considered writing seriously, with your own fiction? If you could understand a character of your own as well as you seem to be able to understand Severus, I think you could go very, very far. Keep it in mind.
This is incredibly sad.
I would just like to comment on the fact that is incredibly perfect. I love how you use monochrome as a means for describing how he views the world. The way you use symbolism with the colors is refreshing. Its not so common to find a piece of fan fiction having all the elements a work of Poe would have.
You have to keep writing! You probably get this alot, but you are a marvelous writer.
Author's Response: I am deeply honored by your praise. I think this is the first time my writing was said to evoke associations with any famous author. *blush*
Thank you very much. As far as writing goes, I hope to follow in the footsteps of Robert Jordan, who said he intends to keep writing 'until they nail shut his coffin'. And so he did.
So I'm finally here. :)
And you know what, I've read this story before! ^.^''
You know your Severus, you know him really really well. And I guess as your writing developes, he developes as well because, well, he is your writing, isn't he? And you do him complete justice. I lvoe how you've made the whole thing centric to Lily's green eyes being Sev's way into seeing the world as something distinctly different. I don't know if that made sense, but it was how I saw it, anyway.
Great story, El! I hope I'll be back to read Episeky and reviewit, because it has caught my attention and I do plan on revisiting your author's page.
Author's Response: It's interesting how different people take different views on the meaning of the color green... and how all those views are correct, too! That's one of the benefits of writing Severus - he and his thoughts have so many facets that I continue discovering some of them even after completing a story...
Thank you for the review, and I hope to see you around Episkey!
I love this El. It was so beautiful. I have a new respect for Severus Snape.
Everything was flawless, and the colors you incorporated, just fabulous!
Author's Response: A new respect for Severus Snape - what better reward can a Snapewriter (term coined by VV, I think) ask for? ;)
Okay, said writer could (and usually does) ask for more of her fics to be read, in order for more of said respect to be instilled. ;)
All in good time, though. Thank you very much!
You are, quite simply, an amazing writer. This fic is powerful, compelling, and sad. I love the way you portrayed Snape and Lily. I've never been fond of Snape/Lily, but I've always been intrigued by it, and I think you've written it beautifully.
The beginning (and end) of this fic is perfect. It begins simply, with no fanfare, and yet it's interesting and hooks the reader, simply because it's different and doesn't claim to be. (*rolls eyes at herself* Sorry, that was really...a terrible way to put it.) It’s nondescript but it introduces the two most important parts of the story.
I love how green was the only color Snape would let into his life. How, basically, Lily was the only person he let into his life (or wanted to). I think the ending, therefore, has so much meaning - all the green is gone, and Lily is dead. I think you wrote that amazingly well - the ending is succinct but powerful in all its implications.
The only nitpick I have would be the dialogue attributions (he said, she said, etc.). I think you used 'said' once, and usually used many other verbs: instructed, ventured, added, and stated. Those are fine and work well, but 'said' should be used a bit more often, because it's "invisible" - meaning, the reader doesn't register it. The other ones draw away from the dialogue and all the power it has in itself without the attributions. Also, if you don't mind this grammar nitpick, when you write something like: "Amazing…I never thought green could be so beautiful," she smiled, it should be punctuated like this: "Amazing...I never thought green could be so beautiful." She smiled because 'she smiled' is not a speaker attribution but an action. But anyway, it isn't that important.
Besides all my nitpicks, your dialogue itself was great - it was believable and realistic, and I can definitely imagine those two talking like that. Fantastic job, this fic is wonderful.
Author's Response: Thank you for your review, Kate! :)
You know, I myself never noticed my affinity for overcomplicating dialogue attributions... I guess it's one of the dangers of writing Severus - he hates reusing words, even words as simple as 'said'. Nevertheless, I'm glad to find the fic liked.
Here I am with a proper review for this wonderful, wonderful piece. But first, please put up with me as I ramble on a bit.
Your stories are always the hardest I find to review as somewhere deep down I always hope to leave as well a thought out and helpful review as you always leave me. Needless to say, I always fail to do so for the simple reason that I can't find any nitpicks or objectionable parts.
This leaves me in a rather hard predicament but I enjoy it to no end.
This was as beautifully heart breaking as ever. There is no praise high enough I can give your Severus and his feelings for Lily.
The way you incorporate it in the bitter sweet manner is truly divine.
There, my extremely unhelpful two knuts worth.
And green is a truly beautiful colour and I can see why this would be the only one Sev would ever let into his world of black and white.
Much, much admiration.=Sammy
Author's Response: Some form of curse prevented me from responding to reviews to this fic for some reason... *is confused and ashamed*
Thank you very much, Sammical, your words mean a lot to me as a fellow Sev girl... And I owe you even more gratitude for getting me to overcome my fear of prompts (for once, at least) and get sufficiently inspired to write this. *huggle*