I first read this and "Muggling Along" several years ago, and have always considered it my all-time favorite fanfiction, from any fandom. :) A burst of nostalgia drew me back here, and it's just as good as I remembered it. :D Great job!
This is a really sweet story...very well written, and gives a whole new perspective to Moody. Well done :)
Great story! I really like Moody, and it's nice to see stories about him, especially falling in love with a Muggle woman. ^^
I hope I'll have the chance to read the others chapters of Muggling Along you're talking about in this chapter. :)
Keep up the great work, I hope to read more Moody stories from you!
I am enjoying this.
Author's Response: Thank you so much for letting me know that you are reading and enjoying my story!
Very enjoyable! I like the subtle mention of Molly. And the socks! How unique, and so interesting to see this from Mad-Eye's point of view, as he wonders how Elizabeth knit those socks that are so complex... without magic.
I do love this story. I love how you portray Moody (and yes, I know I say this every time...) and I love Elizabeth as a character!
Author's Response: Thank you so much for reading and reviewing! I certainly am not going to complain that you like my characterization, no matter how often you say it - thank you! As for the socks... I meant that they were magical to Mad-Eye because he was falling in love with her, but maybe that isn't clear yet? It never even occurred to me that he might think them very complex to have been made without magic, but of course, that could certainly be it. There is a moment coming up with Elizabeth's socks and Minerva, but that is in the next part of the story...
Once again, the characters are wonderful, and I so enjoy the way you write this. And 'Dark Muggles' and 'Dark Muggle catchers'... and the bit about the clock that Arthur had given him...
Great chapter! Love it!
Author's Response: thank you so much for reading and reviewing! I enjoyed those too - trying to figure out how our world looks to Moody... and how he is connected to the other people in the books in more ways than we at first realize. I'm glad you liked it!
I'm a bit of a soft touch for Alastor Moody. I've always thought that there was a heart of gold beneath his gruff and grizzled exterior. I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks that!
Just found your story today and have enjoyed the first four chapters immensely. Well done, well thought out--and great characters! Can't wait for the next chapter!
Author's Response: Thank you for your review! I'm glad you are enjoying my characters - this is actually the Prequel to Muggling Along, and in another chapter or two this will be done and that story will be extended, so there is more Moody-ness to come! The next chapter is written and Brit-picked. I just need my beta to tell me I have too many commas... :-)
I love this story. It is one of the first ones I've read on this site and I think it is wonderful. I can't wait to see what happens next.
I do hope that The story moves on a bit faster. I rather liked her better when she was keeping the fish in her tub than when she was sobbing on her kitchen floor.
Author's Response: Thanks for the review! I can't say I blame you - she likes herself better when she isn't sobbing on the floor. It is not a place she spends a lot of time, but occasionally being so alone and so far away from home gets to her. The story takes place over the course of four years, and she does get a bit down trodden, but I think you'll like her better in the next chapter! Thank you for reviewing!
I absolutely LOVE your portrayal of Moody. You make him breathe, live, feel. And I'm so glad you have involved him with such a deserving girl who cares about him as a person.
First off, I had never read a Moody story before, and I think this story is spot-on characterization. There's a lot we don't know about this man, and I think this story does an accurate job of filling in the gaps of his personality. I read all three chapters in one go (so I'll probably reference all the chapters in a vague sort of order—many apologies). As much as I like the character of Moody, I've enjoyed the character of Elizabeth as well. They both seem very real, flaws and all.
Everything seems well thought out. I've enjoyed reading about the comings and goings of Mrs. Albright and her questionably existent son. It's the little details like this that really make this story stand out, I think. That and the ongoing conversations about rosebushes and fish. It certainly adds color to Moody and Elizabeth's friendship.
I thought the opening sequence of this chapter was very nice. The internal narration seemed appropriately disjointed and confused, considering Moody's physical state.
I'll second the enjoyment of the Poppy/puppy mixup.
He hadn’t laughed in at least ten months, shouldn’t be laughing now, really, and yet…
This line really stood out to me, as well as an earlier passing mention about never wanting to see his trunk again. That really a mystery about Goblet of Fire, isn't it? How horrible was it to be trapped in there, even if he was only aware of it for brief periods at a time?
All told, I've really had a good time reading these chapters, and can't wait to read more!
Author's Response: Thank you for the review and I am so glad you like it! Moody fascinates me, and I can't imagine how he felt, knowing he was in that trunk and Barty Crouch was doing who knew what disguised as him. I can't imagine that he would just walk out of there feeling hale and hearty, no matter how amazing Poppy Pomfrey is. I'm glad you are looking forward to the next chapters.
This jump to Alastor coming home after GOF makes total sense. You wrote his mind perfectly. I totally see him being extra paranoid about coming home and needing to check everything before going into the house. His weakness is portrayed perfectly and his wonderings about splinching himself were perfect! It was interesting how he was afraid of what Arthur and Amos would think about his wanting to check everything over before entering the house. I don’t know if he would worry about what they would think after all he had been through. It is totally understandable, after all.
“Is your puppy alright? I don’t know, I didn’t see one. I’ll go look.”
This line made me laugh. I can see how his mumbling about Poppy could be misconstrued as puppy. Hehe
Elizabeth’s ministrations to Moody were enjoyable to read. Her using the WWI Girl Scout guide gave me a giggle too. That her drink of tea, whiskey, lemon, and sugar helping him more then Poppy’s potions was fun too, but then hers was given with some care and maybe love. . . Poppy’s would have been given with care but. . .
She said nothing about the robes. Could it be she hadn’t noticed? And then, “They make jokes at work about getting us academic robes to teach in, but it’s gallows humor. You’ll have to tell me sometime how you liked them. I’m doing grocery shopping on the way home. Should I pick up milk and bread and coffee and so forth?”
it’s should be its, but other then that, this line really made me laugh. At least she knew he had been teaching, which made this interpretation of his robes acceptable.
I would put a break in between his falling asleep and Elizabeth coming back from work with the groceries. It would make it less jarring for the transition. You can put in some * or just a few extra spaces to break it up a little.
The story ending with a laugh really was nice. It was cool how Elizabeth showed her caring by taking in the fish and tending his roses. The predicament she finds herself in about being unable to move the fish back made me giggle a bit too.
Author's Response: Wow - Thanks for another terrific and detailed review! He might be just a little paranoid about what people are thinking of him at the moment - when a famous Auror spends a number of months in his own trunk, it does not necessarily make him look that competent... In fact, he had a very good reason for not duelling it out in the backyard, which you might find out eventually...but he feels he looks silly, to say the least. I actually had a GS Handbook of incredible vintage when I was young - there was a great deal in it on home nursing. I didn't have it to hand, though, so what it actually said about pulse and temp, if it said anything about them at all, I have no idea. Thanks for the suggestion for where to break the story - I agree, that would make it easier to understand. I think I wrote this chapter over two years ago, so I have read it so many times I am no longer any fit judge of things like that. Elizabeth is not one of those people who enjoys being miserable - if there's a way to laugh, she'll probably find it. She also likes Moody's sense of humor. It might not be the only thing she likes about him...
Thea, I love how you continued this story. The way Moody and Elizabeth are unable to leave the other alone is nicely done and very fun to read. You characterize Moody very well. There is a level to him in your stories that we never see in the books, but I find it refreshing and it makes him more real to me. There has to be a lot more to him then what we find out in the books, and you flesh him out very nicely!
Elizabeth is a very realistic OC. It can be hard to find ones that are fleshed out and REAL. That she is a Muggle makes it even more interesting. I have read your other story, though it has been a while, and I loved her there too. Her insecurities brought about by the teachers and students that has been her life make her more interesting and fun to read. It is nice to get more into her head in this story.
Why had she ever started a diary, thought she’d want to know, at some later date, how she had coped with the crisis of ‘82, or ‘85, or the three of ‘87, or the magnificent flop of ‘91? She did not want to remember now, and she hoped she never would.
This line seems awkward to me. I understand what you are trying to say, but it might make more sense if you split it up a little more. I had to read it a few times to understand it.
I can only imagine how much Moody would learn about Elizabeth after looking through all the diaries and papers. I can see him having a lot of fun with going through that “rubbish”.
“Well, not all those six hundred years.” He had a growly, deep chuckle that matched his speaking voice very nicely. “My family has been here a very long time, though. I grew up in this house. When I was a little boy, I used to fly…paper airplanes onto the roof of yours from my bedroom window.” He seemed, all of a sudden, to be very interested in the beetles on his roses. He picked one off, squished it efficiently between his fingers, and dropped the remains. He did the same with another, and another. Then, he looked up and caught her watching him.
This is one of my favorite lines to this chapter. The way Moody had to catch himself was very real for a wizard with very little contact with Muggles. I noticed several other times that he almost slipped about the wizarding world, and that is fun to me.
The conversation about the fishes and dancing was interesting to read. I’m wondering what type of fish Moody has, because I can’t see him having ordinary fish. The way the fishes react at the end of the chapter, seems to prove that to me.
I can’t imagine Moody dancing, but then who knows what all he did when he was younger. There are so many levels to him that we haven’t been able to see in the books. I think you have a way of finding possibilities for him that are unique, but totally possible. The ideas that you bring to fill his past out are fun and interesting to read.
Elizabeth being into yarn and such. . . I wonder where that comes from, hehehe.
I look forward to reading the next chapter and finding out more about Elizabeth and Alastor.
Author's Response: thank you so much for this detailed review! Both my betas thought that line was awkward, so it with you also agreeing that's three for three and it must only sound magnificent in my own head! I Think I see now, although I never have before, how I can break it up and make it a little easier to swallow - thank you for pointing it out. I'm glad Elizabeth is working as a character - I've worried about that. She is really not your average bear, as I hope will become apparent later on...but she is not a witch. She is magical in a way that anyone can be, if they try hard enough. That's all I'll say right now on that..., In my mind, Moody was born around 1903. I espouse JKR's earlier dates for Dumbledore, and Moody is looking old probably more because he's so battered than because of his actual age. Given that, I figure he danced his way through two World Wars and who knows how many Wizarding ones, and who knows how many women, between then and now. Of course, losing part of his leg has limited his dancing lately. The fish are called by their name in the next chapter - they are magical fish, you can look them up in Fantastic Beasts or the Lexicon... I like to think they were given to him by highly placed wizards on the sub-continent in gratitude for help received...
I like it! I just picked your story up today. You have a whimsical point of view that is delightful. Nice to have a story that is not full of dark angst.
Author's Response: Thank you for the review! I'm glad you like it!I love the the humor in HP, and although of course you see less of it as the books get progressively darker, it is still there - I am particularly fond of Dumbledore mildly terrorizing the Dursleys as he sits in their lounge. I think the collision of the Magical World and the world we know is by its very nature funny, and I'm enjoying that. These two are not the sort of people to dwell on their sadness, so not a lot of dark angst - no matter what happens. Glad you liked it!
very unique. interested to see where it goes. third chapter was a bit confusing but perhaps you meant it to be? to really show moody's discomfort? maybe not lol
Author's Response: Yes, it is absolutely meant to show how his mind is all over the place and his sense of dislocation after ten months lying in the bottom of his trunk, in one position, unwashed, and most likely ill fed, dehydrated and drugged. He should have stayed in the hospital wing or gone to St. Mungo's, but he was too cussedly stubborn. It is also meant to show his neighbor - how she reacts in a crisis, and what she is willing to do for him, as well as what she's already done by taking in his fish, for example. Thank you for this review!
A second and equally delightful chapter. I am curious as to what secrets are in Elizabeth's past and what happened to make her turn her back on life so much.
I do love that you worked in spinning and (one dares hope) knitting will follow. The sad and slow pacing seems just right for two souls who seem so lonely. I am awfully glad that you are not going to wait quite so long to update!
What a suspenseful second chapter! Not suspense in its normal fashion, I suppose, but I am left wondering where this friendship is going to go and how well it's going to form when they're so far apart—not to mention I'm disappointed that he's leaving so soon. This chapter was just so enjoyable; the first part, when they're properly meeting, was just… adorable. I can't imagine it easy for Moody to make friends with someone and you've shown his hesitance and embarrassment so well.
I am really, really loving Elizabeth. Her characterization is not just consistent (a consistency I honestly haven't seen often in OCs) but you just… have to like her. Quiet but opinionated, insecure and easy to relate to… I'm just completely taken with her. And a bit more so, her and Moody's friendship.
I am very eagerly waiting for the next installment. :)
Author's Response: Well, I've got al but the last chapter of this nailed down, so you won't have to wait too long for the next installment. I know I've said that before, but I really do have it all betad and almost entirely ready to go. As far as I know, Moody is a pureblood so he hasn't known a whole lot of Muggles in his life. It's really a step out of his comfort zone, even more so than reading Muggle newspapers, which he probably did as an Auror to keep up with things (As Dumbledore admitted to doing.) There are about 6 chapters to the story, so he leaves, but she sees him afterwards, if that is any comfort... I started it as a prologue to story I had already written and which is up, but reading that might ruin the surprise for you...I don't know... Thanks again for a terrific, thought-out review! pp
I've just got one nitpick (I just can't help it): (All always seemed clear, but he kept the proviso in the plan just to be prepared) Full stop in the parenthesis.
Kaye, won't go there again. =D
I just adore the beginning of this. I'm not even two paragraphs into the story and I'm already pulled in; the fire sentence—or thought, rather—was absolutely wonderful. I'm not quite sure how to explain it articulately but I do love how you've begun with explaining his daily routine, coupled with the line "On a very good day […]." I can just relate so well. Everyone sometimes falls into a routine and the later in the day that routine brings you, the happier you become. Very nicely done. And I also love how we're seeing this badass Auror doing simply mundane things—it's setting up so well for, going by the summary, what this story is about.
So far (I'm to the first asterisk-marked break) I think the characterization of Moody is spot on. No other character who's simply sitting on his porch would mentally run through the actions of the innocent-looking new neighbor—the detailed monologue of this woman, would, without us knowing the character who's narrating, automatically bring anyone's mind to Moody. Also, the bit about the microwave and telling Arthur made me giggle. =D
Overall, I loved this chapter. The letters to Elizabeth's mother were a very interesting way to introduce us to this character; we're not seeing her in a completely rounded light, but from just these letters we have a very nice image of her and her personality.
Careless old man! How in Merlin’s name are you supposed to know she needs one? Shaking, Alastor Moody, who had faced Grindelwald’s followers, who had faced Muggle Nazis, who had faced Death Eaters, sank into a chair, and put his face into his hands.
was just too adorable. Again, we're seeing the badass, fearless, vigilant Moody in a vulnerable and normal situation. I think you've really gone outside of the box where his character is concerned; not only are you taking him completely out of the element we see him in in the series, but you've built a character that is very IC but also original.
On to the next chapter...
Author's Response: If that is the only nit you can find to pick, then I am ecstatic! Thank you so so much for the detailed review. It seems I managed exactly what I was aiming at. We see one Moody when Barty Crouch is imitating him, but when we meet him in Grimmauld place we see another side, and I wanted to show how the sides connect. His story fascinates me. I'm glad I am making this vision of him believable. The letters...I had to think what he'd find in her trash that would intrigue him, and make him want to meet her. He is very methodical. I figured Constant Vigilance would require that.... Thanks again for the review!
I was quite captured after the first paragraph, the tone is very much the crotchety old man. The description of the structure of his day was evocative of the lonely, disconnected life he was now leading. I like the development of the neighbour, through her trash. I was a little jarred by her calling her mother "Mommy" that seems more juvenile than her age would indicate, I would have expected "Mum" or "Mother". You have successfully piqued my interest - I'd love to see where you are going with this! Please update!
Author's Response: Thank you very much for this detailed review. You are not the first person to comment on the way she addresses her mother. I think it may be one particular side of her - perhaps we will see as the story plays out. I'm trying to update very soon, thank you so much for your interest!
I don't normally review for something that hasn't been updated in a while, but I like the start you have created here.
Elizabeth not wanting her mother to know how her life really is is something that I think would be typical for someone in her situation, and like the person we know from Muggling Along and Loss is the Colour of My True Love's Eye.
I want to know if you're going to update or has this been abandoned.
Author's Response: Not abandoned at all, and I have the rest of it written and it is in re-writing - then there will be a new version of Muggling Along which will follow Elizabeth up to the final battle or so. There are major portions of that written as well. Thanks for getting me off my duff - there should be an update within a week. and thanks for letting me know my character is consistent so far! I've been worrying about that! Thanks again, PP
great idea!!! i've never seen moody paired up :) very nice.