Amazing! It's a rhyming ballad, not heavy, but who says everything has to be? My only quibble is that Peter turns into a rat, not a mouse. Maybe its a typo.
Author's Response: Thanks! I guess I didn't really think about a mouse being different from a rat. I'll check out that typo.
Wow...for your first submission that poem was really good. I've never read fanfiction poetry, if I'm honest - I prefer stories over poems. Even so, that poem was brilliant. Well done!
Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you liked it, especially if you're more of a story person :)
Wow!!! I hadn't really comprehended the fact that all the marauders had died!!! They all did die for good causes in the end.
Author's Response: I had a feeling the Marauders would all die but was really hoping Remus wouldn't! After DH I had the idea to write this poem honoring them. Thanks for reviewing!
Wow, i thought this was really good!
Author's Response: Thank you!
Cool poem! It has a nice rhyme scheme to it, and you got the major points in the books all in there,
Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you like the rhyme scheme.
Oh my Godric that ws awesome. I loved the flow, the rhyming the evrything in this.
Of course with a poem so long, the rhyming can't always be perfect but while reading this, I was shivering and the last couple of stanzas made me cry.
Brilliantloy done, love.=Sammy
Author's Response: It was hard to come up with some of the rhymes, so I knew that some of them weren't perfect. I'm really glad you liked it, though! It seems that it made several people cry! Thanks so much for your review!
for the second part of the Sirius verse you could do
A traitor he was once thought
but a true friend he would remain
I'm not sure if you are planning to continue or not but u should!
Author's Response: I'm sorry! The stanza about Sirius got cut off when I tried to edit, along with the rest of the poem! It's actually much longer than what appeared!
Nice. I am trying to find some poetry to read and glad I clicked on to this one.. Just wondering, what about James?
PS: Twilight is amazing.
Author's Response: I'm glad you liked it, but something happened when I tried to edit it! There is a stanza about James and also a LOT more to the rest of the poem! For some reason it got cut off. Sorry! And yes, I love Twilight! My friends at school were reading it and they told me I should, so I did and I loved it!
this is so nice! by the end of it i started crying! i love the Marauders and they all had to die! I cried for a week when Sirius died! then she kills Remus as well. and left little Ted alone.
Woohoo to the Marauders!!!! even Peter...he was bad, real bad, but he was alright at school and they liked him so...yh...
errr...anywayz...! Love it!
Author's Response: Aw, thank you! I didn't realize it would make people cry! That means a lot! Glad you liked it!
Great summary and rhyming :]
Author's Response: Thank you!
This is a very good poem, but there is one mistakish thing that has not been mentioned...
He married Nymphadora Tonks
And gave birth to a son,
Surelt it should be 'who gave birth to a son' or 'and they had a son' otherwise it sounds like Remus bave birth, which shouldn't be happening...
Still, I thought it was brilliant, that was the only thing I could find that hadn't already been mentioned.
Author's Response: Yes, you're right, but I was referring to the two of them together having a son. I think I'll change this anyway because it does sound a bit strange. Thanks for the advice...I'm new here.
Now this is interesting! I like the rhyming, because it brought to mind the Sorting Hat's Song (at least for me), the same ABCB pattern, y'know? The Marauders are my favorite subject to write about, so yay!
Just a few things...
When you say:
"Sirius escaped Azkaban
To get revenge on Wormtail.
He knew exactly where he was:
Hogwarts school, he was there."
I'm sorry, but that doesn't rhyme. It kind of threw me off. Maybe the last line of the stanza could be something like "to Hogwarts School led his trail" ? Just a suggestion.
And then... When you said:
"Sirius, while dueling with
His cousin Bellatrix
Fell through the veil and to his death
With no way to unfix."
This is just a minor detail, but how do you unfix something? Wouldn't they want to fix it instead? Just a tidbit.
Author's Response: Yeah, I did have some trouble with the rhymes. The 'unfix' part was the best I could come up with at the time, but I think I'll change that to 'fix.' I hadn't thought of that. Thanks!
wow, great poem! it really sums up the whole saga doesn't it? lol
Author's Response: Thanks! And yes, summing up the saga was my goal. It was fun to write.
oh that was so nice. i loved it you told everything i really liked the ending :)
Author's Response: Thank you! I wanted to see how it worked out if I summed up the whole Marauder story. Glad you liked the ending!
Wow this was really good. I really love the ending. Keep writing!!!!!!
Author's Response: Thanks! I already had the ending planned out in my head so I wrote the rest of the poem to fit it. Glad you liked it!
oh you might want to put DH spoilers, cause it tells some things that happen.
but i loved it :]
Author's Response: Thank you! And thanks for pointing that out...I went ahead and added a DH spoiler warning.
aww that was so good.
it made me cry and smile :]
Author's Response: Thank you so much! And thanks for my first review ever!