MuggleNet Fan Fiction
Harry Potter stories written by fans!

Name: Old Weasly (Signed) · Date: 08/29/11 12:35 · For: Prologue
Truely an outstanding story I can't wait until the next chapter. Bravo

Name: moonstargazer (Signed) · Date: 11/12/08 23:46 · For: Interrupted
I thought it was brilliant! Full of excitement and action. Very well detailed and the wedding was very beautiful, before the Death Eaters showed up. Talk about crashing a party!
I'm glad you enjoyed writing this chapter. It was very well written and full of detailed action.
I hope Harry and Co got away safely...

Name: moonstargazer (Signed) · Date: 11/12/08 23:07 · For: Prepared
Thank you for another great chapter! I just came across this story last night, I should have mentioned that in my first review...But anywho, I like the plotline, and Harry is feeling guilty towards Ginny, because of breaking up with her.
I've noticed that they seem like they want to be together, but because of Harry's search for the Horcruxes, they can't, and Ginny wonders why she can't come with the Trio.
The Weasleys as always treat Harry like a son and brother. If it were'nt for Mrs Weasley, Harry would not have a birthday, especially his 17th birthday.
I hope the wedding goes well, and nothing weird happens...
Thanks again for a great story and I'll continue to read the rest of it.

Name: Loyd1957 (Signed) · Date: 11/12/08 10:51 · For: Doubled
Well this has been an intense story so far. Very intense. After that last chapter, I forgot why Harry was going there in the first place. Great fight scene and glad Harry could go into the Veil and see Sirius and his parents. He has to learn he is not in this alone.

Name: Loyd1957 (Signed) · Date: 11/12/08 7:34 · For: Interrupted
I can see why it is one of your favorite chapters. Awesome action and drama. The violence definitely is on the level with what we all would assume with death eaters. Done well. Poor Gabrielle though. Love to see Ginny being a powerful source in this story. Always thought that would come out more in the JK books. Let's see if now the journey begins for Harry and the trio.

Name: harrietamidala (Signed) · Date: 11/12/08 0:12 · For: Doubled
ah, man, Harry's got himself into real trouble--now what's gonna happen?

Name: moonstargazer (Signed) · Date: 11/11/08 23:12 · For: Disguised
Everything makes sense to me! I am really enjoying this story and look forward to reading more.
Harry had a narrow escape at the Ministry of Magic, lucky for him, he could Apparate. Whew!
And he was able to disguise himself well. And look good too! lol
Thanks for the great tale and good luck in writing the rest of it!

Name: moonstargazer (Signed) · Date: 11/11/08 22:49 · For: Shaken
Well, it's obvious that Harry's aunt and uncle hated him to the end. A true shame..And quite the activity as the house was losing the magical wards set on it years before. Harry was lucky to get away unscathed.
A pretty exciting chapter and a great read! Thanks for writing it!

Name: moonstargazer (Signed) · Date: 11/11/08 19:53 · For: Prologue
Very sad tale about Aberforth. It provides insight into how Albus thought of him., by stopping in to see him.
I look forward to reading this fanfic...I'm curiious to see how the 7th year at Hogwarts plays out.
Should be interesting to read!

Name: FriendofMolly (Signed) · Date: 10/24/08 17:55 · For: Hallowed
Oh my. It was scary, it was action packed, it was awesome. It sounds like Harry and Ginny somehow apparated into the Room of Love. Have they now been bonded? I thought Harry had wanted to talk to Dumbledore?I'll be waiting for the next chapter

Author's Response: I'm so glad some of the plot points are coming across! You ask really insightful questions, and I don't know how much to tell you, since a lot of questions are answered in the next chapter, but you're spot on in most cases. I was so intrigued by the Department of Mysteries in the fifth book and so I made sure we got a chance to revisit it. Harry's trip behind the Veil was what I was thinking of when I first heard the title Deathly Hallows, so that will be something that's expanded later in the story. Thanks so much for the review!

Name: mrsbrandyc (Signed) · Date: 09/24/08 8:40 · For: Confronted
ive enjoyed this story, great job!

Name: mrsbrandyc (Signed) · Date: 08/24/08 18:01 · For: Arrived
loved it. and i think that you should have fleur handle greyback on her own. now that would be an awesome chapter. keep writing this is a great story

Name: mrsbrandyc (Signed) · Date: 08/24/08 18:01 · For: Arrived
loved it. and i think that you should have fleur handle greyback on her own. now that would be an awesome chapter. keep writing this is a great story

Name: harrietamidala (Signed) · Date: 08/24/08 11:19 · For: Arrived
that russian teacher seems kinda suspicious, at least I think that's who the "she" is in the passage. Could she actually be a death eater in disguise?

Name: mrsbrandyc (Signed) · Date: 08/17/08 13:54 · For: Received
i love this story.. its very well written

Name: FriendofMolly (Signed) · Date: 08/15/08 14:33 · For: Received
Oh Wow, this presents some very deep possibilities. Can't wait for the next.

Name: mrsbrandyc (Signed) · Date: 08/03/08 15:45 · For: Returned
EXCELLENT! I cant wait to read more!

Name: FriendofMolly (Signed) · Date: 07/27/08 23:38 · For: Returned
Snape to the rescue??? Cool

Name: mrsbrandyc (Signed) · Date: 07/20/08 18:50 · For: Interrupted
wonderful dont make me wait too long to see what happens next!

Author's Response: The next chapter is already in the queue. Thanks for the review

Name: washedmemories (Signed) · Date: 07/20/08 8:51 · For: Shaken
Mistakes, as great as I find this, everyone has them, so I think it would be fair to help you out by pointing those that I could find :D

They pulled back and suddenly the sounds of the crowd were foisted into Harry's sunny room. Several girls were giggling and Peakes wolf-whistled at Harry, shaking his hands over his shoulder in victory.

So in this one, crowd is singular and the verb has to match the subject so it should be was. The reason I placed it in a bracket that you are about to see is because I wasn't actually sure if was should be there or not. It's just to give you an idea how it would look without it.

They pulled back and suddenly the sounds of the crowd [was] foisted into Harry's sunny room.

Haha, I actually loved the one bit with the Lucky Potion, brilliant job with that. Oh just think of how pissed Ginny would be if it was a bit of potion that made him fall for her. And think of how hurt she would be =(

...and Aunt Petunia's tinny reply from down in the kitchen.

Well I wanted to point out that you spelled tinny with two n's unless it really is a different word that I don't know about =)

...and rage of 16 years, into Harry's cheekbone.

Consistency. If you spell out numbers throughout, keep it that way, Don't go changing it around. Either spell the numbers or use the numerical value (and it is usually zero through ten that you would use numerical value then type anything else) and keep with that =)

Harry turned to his aunt, but Petunia was suddenly bustling about, pulling the broom from the closet in the corner and sweeping up the remains of the plates and her vase. Harry knew that cleaning was his aunt’s way of coping and merely stood, waiting for her.

Haha even when the whole world goes to hell, just look for Petunia cleaning =)

And as I reached the ending of the chapter I have a few things that bothered me. One, how could the Death Eater's see the house? Even without the knowledge of the seventh book, I'm sure Dumbledore would've done simple magic to protect the house's identity from Death Eaters. And why would the Order leave like that? Who knows, they might just go on a Muggle killing spree and that would be left on the Order's shoulders. Other than that, great job, loved it, want to read more.

Author's Response: Thank you for such a meticulous response!! I loved the critique blended with the parts you like, that's exactly what best helps me to write. I'd like to make a slight rebuttal for your first comment. In that sentence the subject of the phrase is actually sounds (a plural noun) while noise is the object of the preposition, so the subject-verb agreement is actually ok (sounds...were foisted). Tinny is a word; it's metallic (tin) and high-pitched, kind of like nails on a blackboard, which is what Petunia's voice reminded me of. I'll have to think about your comment concerning the end of the chapter. I think Harry was hoping that the Death Eaters were only there for him, and since the Dursleys were gone, they'd have no leverage by going after others on the street. I'm afraid with the death of Dumbledore and Harry's coming of age, the magic protecting the house from detection is faltering, sort of like static on a TV, so in those moments that the magic flickers, the house's identity could be revealed. Does that answer most of your questions? Thanks so much again for the comments. You pulled out a few of my favorite moments from the chapter too. I'd love to have more of your detailed reviews!

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