MuggleNet Fan Fiction
Harry Potter stories written by fans!

Name: dspotter (Signed) · Date: 06/24/11 22:16 · For: My Goodness My Guiness!
This has nothing to do with your storybut, I read this last night and then you were in my dream. But instead of being absurd, you were really evil. Well I guess it wasn't exactly you but Tim the Enchanter was definitely the name of the evil guy.

Name: GinnyPottterGranger (Signed) · Date: 05/23/11 11:23 · For: The Great Chocolate War of ‘98
WHOA! the sad thing is. i kinda acted like roy the avenger when my bestie got a copy of DH before i did

Name: GinnyPottterGranger (Signed) · Date: 05/23/11 11:01 · For: My Goodness My Guiness!
sorry for my review in ch.1, i really like hermione. anyway, when's harry going to show up again, if he does?

Name: GinnyPottterGranger (Signed) · Date: 05/23/11 10:51 · For: Out of the Darkness...
how is this humorous?!?!

Name: AReader (Signed) · Date: 07/17/10 18:19 · For: Epic Ephemeral Epilogue
What is this story about? I can't seen to find a plot. It was funny, though, and happy birthday!

Name: The Lark Dord (Signed) · Date: 06/02/09 2:00 · For: Out of the Darkness...
Awesome story! I really think you should do the THIS IS HOGWARTS! – A Stupid Crossover Parody idea.
The end was a bit depressing, but fantastic writing! I absolutely loved the Absurd fanfic revolution...
I liked the Ben Dover scene (in Rita's scene).
The end was a bit depressing, but great story! ;-)

Author's Response:

I’m glad the story of Benjamin Dover has met your approval, so thanks for reading and enjoying my writing! Concerning THIS IS HOGWARTS!, I finished that story about a year ago, but it never made it onto MNFF because it was still a crossover, despite the fact that it was a parody of them. However, do not fear! You can read it on fanfiction.net if you like.

~ Tim the Enchanter

Name: Vittoria (Signed) · Date: 04/20/09 0:34 · For: Out of the Darkness...
I just loved the first chapter Tim! The driver's reaction was awesome. And the Dark Lord is overcome by Muggle equipment? Now what would he think? I can see why you like cement-mixers. Good Job!

Author's Response:

Indeed I do like cement mixers! As Thucydides said, “A collision with a cement mixer can ruin your entire day…”

And I’m glad the driver’s anguish met your approval! Thanks for the review, and remember to look both ways before crossing the street!

~ Tim the Enchanter

Name: minnabird (Signed) · Date: 04/14/09 22:22 · For: Epic Ephemeral Epilogue
Since I’m a syntax nut, I have a few nitpicky grammar/spelling notes:

‘He levelled his wand, aiming strait at Harry’s chest.’ – chapter one

In this case, the word is spelled “straight.”

‘“Well, if you’re going to act like a total idiot, I guess I’ll just piss off then. I’ll tell the boss that you’ve lost your marbles.” declared Frank as he walked off.’ – chapter three

The period after marbles should be a comma.

‘This is just getting better and better, his mind scathed.’ – chapter three

I don’t think scathed is a verb. (There’s also another instance later when the wife’s talking).

‘Too long have torn families apart, ruined futures, and destroyed all hope for those praying for better days! It has been too long!”’ – the epilogue

You probably wanted to say, “Too long have you torn…”

And now that that’s over with, allow me to gush over how funny the story was. Voldemort killed by a cement mixer—priceless. Not to mention Bellatrix vanquished with a toothbrush (however did he manage that?) And a nice game of U2…

And no, this is not your Easter Egg, merely a review to tell you how much I loved Out of the Darkness. =)

Author's Response:

Hello, Minna!

Thanks for the review, and for the lovely banner! Also, I appreciate your proofreading – you’d make a good beta, if you aren’t one already.

Anyway, I’m glad you found Voldemort’s absurd demise amusing! I intentionally leave the details of Benjamin Dover’s defeat of Bellatrix a mystery, but in my imagination, he pokes his toothbrush though the eyehole of her Death Eater mask.

~ Tim the Enchanter

Name: hedwig_pigwidgeon (Signed) · Date: 04/10/09 8:41 · For: Epic Ephemeral Epilogue
Who WOULDN'T be mad if they were bested by a Muggle with a cement mixer?
Stupid effing Muggles! :)

Author's Response:

Shh! Don’t say that! The Muggles might hear you! Who knows what other devious tricks they have up their sleeves? Forklift trucks? Combine harvesters? STEAMROLLERS?!

Anyway, thanks for reading, reviewing, and enjoying this insane story!

~ Tim the Enchanter

Name: hedwig_pigwidgeon (Signed) · Date: 04/09/09 21:16 · For: The Great Chocolate War of ‘98
This is a brilliant story,mate!
piggy_wiggy ;)

Author's Response:

Glad you enjoyed, and thanks for the review!

~ Tim the Enchanter

Name: hedwig_pigwidgeon (Signed) · Date: 04/09/09 20:52 · For: Out of the Darkness...
How come you always kill people with that same cement mixer?!



piggy_wiggy :)

Author's Response:

This was actually the first story I wrote that featured the infamous cement mixer, and as you have probably noticed, it has made appearances in some of my other fics! Also, I killed off Hermione for the simple reason that I wanted the scene to be darker and direr, just to provide more contrast to the absurd vehicular homicide later in the chapter. Anyway, thanks for the review!

~ Tim the Enchanter

Name: Zoheb (Signed) · Date: 12/27/08 3:02 · For: Epic Ephemeral Epilogue
The most brilliant thing about this story is how it shifts effortlessly from ludicrous to angry, with the writing remaining strong throughout. Hats off to you, Master Tim.

Author's Response:

Thank you very much for reviewing this story all the way through, Zoheb! Plus, I am very glad you liked this story and its mechanics. If you’re interested in more ludicrous stories, you might also want to read The Absurd Fanfic Revolution, which is probably the weirdest and must surreal fic I’ve written!

Tim the Enchanter

Name: Zoheb (Signed) · Date: 12/27/08 2:51 · For: The Great Chocolate War of ‘98
I love the humour in this story. It's sophisticated and intelligent. There's a lot more to say about it, but I can't find the words.

Author's Response:

Remember, if you're lost for words, you can always say “Bbluubbaaarrrggghhh!” Anyway, thanks for the lovely comments!

Tim the Enchanter

Name: Zoheb (Signed) · Date: 12/27/08 2:35 · For: My Goodness My Guiness!
A hero unlike any other.

Author's Response:

How can we ever thank Benjamin Dover enough for what he did that night? I know! Draw a picture of him! Just copy and paste the following thing into that URL address whatever you call it:


That reminds me… I should put this at the end of this chapter, too…

Anyway, thanks for the review!

Name: Zoheb (Signed) · Date: 12/27/08 2:19 · For: Out of the Darkness...

No, I really laugh like that. It's the illustration that did it. Beautiful acompaniment to a wonderfully-written story. You have class, you have style, you have humorously-bad handwriting.

Author's Response:

Thanks for the review and for liking this story! Just so you know, you’re not the only one who is appalled by my handwriting! Believe it or not, it used to be neat and tidy, but I have long since forgotten how to write like that, so everything I write by hand is nigh unintelligible! I actually kind of like my handwriting, because I’m the only person who seems to be able to read it with any kind of ease – plus I think it looks cool. It looks… rushed and insane!

Tim the Enchanter

Name: Fenrir_Confringo (Signed) · Date: 11/24/08 11:13 · For: Out of the Darkness...

Hahaha! Great, loved it. I liked how you used the suspense of Voldemort's arrival and death of Hermione in the beginning, making it seemingly a serious story, and then took it to the humor level with the cement truck killing Voldemort right at the end. :)

You are a great writer.


Author's Response:

Thanks for the review, Fenrir_Confringo; I'm glad you like the story! I do feel sorry for Hermione, since I only killed her off just to set a very dark mood - but her death was not in vain! It made Benjamin Dover's entrance into the story all the more gloriously absurd!

And remember, cement mixers solve all problems!

Tim the Enchanter

Name: thesmart1 (Signed) · Date: 09/23/08 18:17 · For: Epic Ephemeral Epilogue
this isn't a very funny humor fic. Try a little more for funny than mock-sad. just doesn't work. sorry

Author's Response:

The ending is not supposed to be funny – the story starts out very dark, and similarly ends the same way. I do understand that though Out of the Darkness is a humour story, it is certainly not funny through-and-through, and that was my intention. It is a comedic tragedy or a tragic comedy, depending on how you want to word it.

Before I ran Voldemort over with the cement mixer in Chapter One, I had killed off Hermione for no better reason than to accentuate how dire Harry’s situation was. The end of the fourth and last chapter was written to remind the reader of the rather depressing consequences of such an eventuality, and to introduce the premise of much more serious sequel.

At any rate, thank you for reviewing, and I hope you have a better understanding of the intended point of the story.

Tim the Enchanter

Name: Ravenclaws Noble Heir (Signed) · Date: 08/08/08 17:13 · For: Epic Ephemeral Epilogue

thats ... whoa


Author's Response:

Indeed it is. Thank you for reading!

Tim the Enchanter

Name: Ravenclaws Noble Heir (Signed) · Date: 08/08/08 14:07 · For: My Goodness My Guiness!
oh dear

the-ben-who-ran-over-he-who-must-not-be-named-with-his-cement-truck-and-rid-us-forever-of-the terror!!!

we thank u ben!!!


Author's Response: Thank you for reviewing, admirer of the-illustrious-Benjamin-Dover-who-saved-us-all-with-his-cement-mixer! He’s the greatest man who ever lived, and I don’t think we can ever thank him enough. Tim the Enchanter

Name: Fullmetal Jack (Signed) · Date: 08/01/08 0:26 · For: The Great Chocolate War of ‘98
BRAVO!!! BRAVO!!! This was EPIC!!!!! I really enjoyed this story (by “really enjoyed”, I mean it was FREAKIN AMAZING). How much did I enjoy it? Well, let’s just say that a few more sentences probably would have killed me. Yes….it was that funny. It was like an orgasm for the brain. It was vigorously entertaining and ragingly hilarious!!!!! I’ve read a lot of books lately, but this by far has to be the funniest thing I have ever read in a very long time; if not ever.

The effort made by that poor guy was just too funny to read. It was just one absurdity after the other. It seriously made my eyes water. It was so good, as a matter of fact; I had e-mailed all my friends about it and told virtually all my book pals at school. You don’t even have to be a Harry Potter fan to enjoy this literary masterpiece. I must say, you have certainly outdone yourself this time.

Please, for the love of all that is glorious!!! Please tell me that there is in fact a sequel to this absolutely amazing series. If there is, I would just like to say that you are my new god and that I will worship you like the heavens and the stars (figuratively speaking of course….or am I?).

From your crazy fanboy, Jack.

Author's Response:

Hello there, Jack!

Well, sorry it took me so long to respond to this – how should I say it? – interesting review! I was a bit busy writing some other stories, but enough excuses! I am glad that you liked this story with such intensity. “Orgasm for the brain” – now that’s something I’ve never heard before! Also, thank you for liking this rather mad story of mine so much that you decided to tell all of your friends about it. I always appreciate more reads!

Anyway, you can tell that I had a lot of fun writing this story, but the funny thing is, I can’t seem to remember using my brain for this chapter. I just sat down at my computer and all 6000+ glorious words of Chapter Three were written in one sitting… and I was laughing the whole time!

To answer your question, Jack, all I have to say is that you better practise prostrating yourself at my feet, because there will be a sequel! I am in fact writing the sequel, Into the Light (notice how the title says the exact same thing as Out of the Darkness?), but the main reason why it is a separate story is because it is much more serious and has very little humour.

So, thank you once again for reviewing. Remember, it’s not me who’s the saviour – it’s Benjamin Dover.

Tim the Enchanter

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