MuggleNet Fan Fiction
Harry Potter stories written by fans!

Name: Kcharles (Signed) · Date: 06/01/08 16:14 · For: Chapter 1
This is the first Historical Fic that I've read, and I loved it! I was at first just looking for a story for class on the forums, but I had to stop and read this! Good job, and keep writing!

Author's Response: Thanks, glad you enjoyed it! =)

Name: James Jameson (Signed) · Date: 12/16/07 11:11 · For: Chapter 1
That was awesome! Great job samarie! I really liked the part about the sun and the Moon! It was as if JKR wrote it! That is exactly how I pictured that whole situation happening! You even had the language right.... like the old sayings and tone. Amazing!

Author's Response: Thanks so much, Christine! Glad you liked it!

Name: Pondering (Signed) · Date: 12/11/07 2:24 · For: Chapter 1
Wait. Please don't tell me that I haven't reviewed this yet. *dies*

I absolutely loved your story. I remember commenting on how it made me cry while I was betaing it, and it's very moving, very exceptional. Some of the way the sentences are structured still sound only mildly awkward, but it actually helps with setting the atmosphere that these events happened a long time ago, before modern english has progressed into what it is now.

What am I talking about? I think I get off track way too easily.

I think you did Rowena's heartbreak with the loss of her daughter very well indeed, and everything that she went through I could almost feel as well.

Congratulations on placing! You deserve it. :)


Author's Response: Tash! *tacklehugssquish* Thanks so much for your review! *is hyper* *you already know that*

People! Go get Tash as a Beta, she's fabulous! *huggles*

Name: Afifa (Signed) · Date: 12/07/07 6:46 · For: Chapter 1
first of all, CONGRATULATIONS! =D
wow! that was amazing, emotional and moving! i envy you though, english is my second tongue too but you're really good at it! a lot better than me. anyways, may i give a suggestion please? write more fics, will you??

Author's Response: Double, double, toil and trouble! =)

Name: Afifa (Signed) · Date: 12/07/07 6:41 · For: Chapter 1
first of all, CONGRATULATIONS! =D
wow! that was amazing, emotional and moving! i envy you though, english is my second tongue too but you're really good at it! a lot better than me. anyways, may i give a suggestion please? write more fics, will you??

Author's Response: Thanks! And I'll do my best to write for my fics soon.. *giggles*

Author's Response: Er.. I meant to say "And I'll do my best to wrie more fics soon..." I don't know what happened there... =)

Name: Pendraegona (Signed) · Date: 12/06/07 23:30 · For: Chapter 1
Wow, this is your first fic, and English is your second language? I'm even more impressed!

Sorry for not being specific about this bit..."Even brothers can end in hate" confused me, because for a person to "end" made me think of death, not a falling out between two people. Perhaps "even brotherly love can turn to hate"? Perhaps it's just me. That was my fault for not explaining.

Again, it was a beautiful piece, you did a lovely job, and good luck in the challenge!

Author's Response: Thanks so much. This story won third place in the challenge, so I am very excited. ^-^

Name: mrsmcclnt (Signed) · Date: 12/06/07 15:04 · For: Chapter 1
*cries hysterically*

It's like my greatest fear that my child would turn on me. As much as I love her to death, and she loves me in return, I know she'll be tainted by the world and have her own opinions. And then she won't view me as her loving mother, but some over bearing figure.


It's a great story. Very moving. As a single working mother, I see myself in Rowena's position. So I'm amazed that you captured that range of emotion so well.

I would say more, but I'm suddenly overcome with fear and need to grab hold of my child.c

Author's Response: Aww.. *pets Marsha* I'm having contraicting feelings because of your review. I feel so sad that I caused you to feel that way, bu in the other hand that was what I was aiming for, so it means I did a good job, right?

Almost every child grows up and forgets the love and admiration he/she once felt fo their parents, I just wish that your relationship with your daughter doesn't end up in that way...

~ Samarie

Name: ginny_potter14 (Signed) · Date: 12/06/07 12:18 · For: Chapter 1
hi this story is a great way to describe why elena stole the diadem its great

Author's Response: Thanks!

Name: Trucker (Signed) · Date: 12/05/07 22:59 · For: Chapter 1
Wow! While I was tempted to nitpick over some wording choices, the story itself captures so much of the feelings of a mother and how the innocent love of a child changes all too often to negative feelings.

Author's Response: Thanks! Thatís what I was aiming for.

Name: Pendraegona (Signed) · Date: 12/05/07 22:11 · For: Chapter 1
Interesting and unique use of the sun/moon metaphor! Very convincingly written, esp. Helena's letter--you captured her bitterness perfectly.

There were some awkward places here and there..."I had been writing a letter to my soon-to-be betrothed" (so her lover hasn't acutally proposed yet?). "Yes, but even brothers can end in hate"--could you rephrase that, please? Second scene, first paragraph: "...and I had no intentions of going out any time soon." I would cut the paragraph after that, because the second and third paragraphs convey the same information, but you were much more articulate in the third. End of fourth scene: "placing it back in its help"--I think you had a different word in mind than "help". Maybe "stand"? Your last sentence..."my Helena, the moon of my sky"...is a metaphor that I don't quite understand. You could say Helena is the moon in her blackest night, as a metaphor for despair or loneliness, but the meaning behind "sky" escapes me.

Good job with the story, and good luck with the challenge!

Author's Response: Thanks so much for the review! Itís my first review ever, and it wasnít as bad as I wouldíve thought Ė in terms of what they think/found of my story. To answer your first question, yes, he has proposed, they just arenít married yet; it is a small mistake I made, I thought betrothed was a synonym of husband/wife. When she later says that her betrothed had left her, it meant her husband. Please forgive me, English is my second language, and not my primary. Why should I rephrase ďbut even brothers end in hateĒ? You havenít said anything to make me think thereís something wrong with it. I donít know what was I thinking when I wrote help. Maybe it was my conscience asking for help? Mmm... Anyways, yes I meant stand, even if they arenít alike in any matter. The way Iíve always thought of the metaphor is that the moon, like the sun, itís the center of admiration of the sky. When one person looks up at the sky they always search for the moon, or the sun if itís day. The way I see it, Rowena knew that when Helena said she was the sun, she meant she also admired her, even if it was grudgingly. Rowena only wished Helena had gotten her turn to be admired, the way Rowena admired her.

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