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MuggleNet Fan Fiction
Harry Potter stories written by fans!

Name: Theloonyhermione (Signed) · Date: 07/07/12 23:23 · For: Chapter 6
I had a few questions and comments:
Is it normal for there to be more than one witch or wizard in a muggle family?
And I am surprised that Flitwick became Headmaster, I would have expected it to be Mcgonagall, for she was deputy headmistress. Although, it is your story, write it the way you like.
Is there magical schools in the US? I always imagined the americans to go to Hogwarts.....but once again, your story.
I liked how Harry was the DADA teacher, although I guess I could have guessed that.
The part where Mr. Weasley shook their hands 'violently', as you said, confused me a bit. He seemed a little bit out of character, but it's fine if you don't change it, because he became more like his normal self when he was talking to Jane's father about the muggle things.
I found a typo in the second chapter. When you say, '. I heard him mutter something, I think it might have been “Beginner’s luck!” bfore going back to work with George.' You said bfore instead of before.
And in the third chapter: I'm pretty sure Impendimentia is a spell to slow down your enemies, not trip them.
Also, did you ever say what house Jane was in? Maybe I missed it.
Good job, I liked it a lot!


Name: Binka Fudge (Signed) · Date: 01/17/08 19:28 · For: Chapter 6
I absolutely love this fic! It's so nice to see Hogwarts from a fresh point of view again. And Harry, he seems very comfortable in himself now, which is so great, I think he should have been a teacher at Hogwarts rather than an auror. It's nice to see Mr Weasley hasn't changed, Hermione is as practical and helpful as ever and Ginny is still full of confidence. I love the telepathy between Jane and George, can't wait for the next chapter. Hope nothing too dark happens, it'd be nice to see a peaceful worlk for once. thanks


Name: Clugin (Signed) · Date: 12/09/07 3:27 · For: Chapter 1
Ohhh, Thats where you got the mind reading from. Neet concept that is. The whole twin mind reading thing. I also really like the american idea. Also my favorit books to read are journal books. This has so far been really great. I find it to feel more real when in journal form. Keep it up. Its awsome.


Name: lily_007 (Signed) · Date: 11/12/07 9:25 · For: Chapter 6
good going...update soon


Name: rambkowalczyk (Signed) · Date: 11/11/07 21:15 · For: Chapter 6
Finally, conflict. Keep up the good work.


Name: Hermione Clone (Signed) · Date: 11/11/07 16:51 · For: Chapter 6
Great chapter! I love how this story is evolving.
Is Jacob Prince any relation to Eileen Prince, or for that matter Snape?
Please, update soon!


Name: SnickerinSnargaluffs (Signed) · Date: 11/11/07 14:07 · For: Chapter 1
Awesome I've always liked the idea of Americans in Hogwarts! Great story I wonder if you'll bring in Occulomency and Legillemency or not. Keep it up!


Name: tiger_lily821 (Signed) · Date: 11/11/07 8:34 · For: Chapter 6
Oh, I love this story! I don't usually get into this category, but this is awesome!
One comment though- Isn't it a bit weird that there's only three Slytherins in the group of forty or fifty first years?
Keep on writing!


Name: jesslyn (Signed) · Date: 11/03/07 23:49 · For: Chapter 5
can't wait for more! it's really great


Name: Hermione Clone (Signed) · Date: 11/03/07 8:26 · For: Chapter 5
Great chapter! I love how it jumps all over the place, just like a real diary.
Please, update soon!


Name: Leahr (Signed) · Date: 10/31/07 22:04 · For: Chapter 5
Wow! You really give Jane a voice, she is very likeable and lively. A few minor typos here and there, like "that'some" in one place and "Yvonne whispered t me", but that is minor. Excellent story so far! Loved the Slughorn scene- isn't he really old by now? Update please!

Author's Response: Thank you! Sorry 'bout the typos - I'll fix them. I'm glad you like the way I write Jane - she's one of my favorite characters that I've ever written. As for Slughorn, my take on him is that, after DH, he'd stay at Hogwarts until the day he dies, and frankly I can imagine him staying on past that, as a ghost. He seems the type, doesn't he?


Name: Hermione Clone (Signed) · Date: 10/24/07 20:20 · For: Chapter 3
Great chapter!
Too bad the twins got split up, but as long as they're happy where they are, that's fine.
Interesting putting Gwen in Slytherin, she seemed so nice.
Update soon!


Name: rambkowalczyk (Signed) · Date: 10/21/07 19:07 · For: Chapter 3
enjoying the read. When did Jane do magic?


Name: Hermione Clone (Signed) · Date: 10/20/07 17:00 · For: Chapter 2
Great Chapter! One thing, though, I don't think goblins are green. Other than that, great job! I can't wait to read the next chapter!


Name: Hermione Clone (Signed) · Date: 10/16/07 19:30 · For: Chapter 1
This is really interesting. I can't wait to see where it goes from here. I'm assuming that in this story, J.K. Rowling didn't write the series, since DH would have come out in 2007 and many people would have heard of everything, and possibly recognized Harry Potter.
Great Job!
Update soon!

Author's Response: You're exactly right. Thanks for the kind words - chapter two is in the queue now!


Name: Hermione Clone (Signed) · Date: 10/16/07 19:30 · For: Chapter 1
This is really interesting. I can't wait to see where it goes from here. I'm assuming that in this story, J.K. Rowling didn't write the series, since DH would have come out in 2007 and many people would have heard of everything, and possibly recognized Harry Potter.
Great Job!
Update soon!


Name: kenthetroll (Signed) · Date: 10/16/07 2:04 · For: Chapter 1
A very cute story.


Name: JmIliana (Signed) · Date: 10/15/07 20:19 · For: Chapter 1
Incredible beginning. Just one thing though,

Mr. and Mrs. Barnaby
The Kitchen
Number 34 Clevedon Road
St. Margarets
London TW1

When you say that, you'd might want to replace 'Mrs.' with Ms. or Miss. Because Mrs. is like when you talk to someone who is married.
Anyways, it was excellently written. Can't wait for more ^^
~JmIliana


Author's Response: The letter was sent to the parents, not to the kids, that's why it was Mrs and not Miss. Thanks for the very nice review - chapter two is in the queue now!


Name: JustLikeHermione77 (Signed) · Date: 10/15/07 19:52 · For: Chapter 1
good story!


Name: rambkowalczyk (Signed) · Date: 10/15/07 15:50 · For: Chapter 1
The diary form is a nice way to bring out the story. Will George keep a journal as well? I like the wording of Flitwick's letter. Hope to see more.

Author's Response: Thank you! I'm not sure about George - I hadn't thought of that.


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