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Harry Potter stories written by fans!

Name: FaunaCaritas (Signed) · Date: 12/09/07 5:00 · For: Endings
I liked the story. You really did a great job. I enjoyed it from start to close. Hermione the vampire is such an interesting concept... it is so completely the antithesis of her normal nature.

I especially liked your story because:

1. Your descriptions were excellent. You made them fresh and original, used a broad but not pompous vocabulary, and you didn't go on and on forever. That takes both skill and restraint.

2. Your plot was clever, engaging, and had a fun twist. Bravo.

I had a couple of (I hope) constructive criticisms:

1. Your characters sometimes bordered on occness... not majorly, mind, but occasionally I thought Severus was too sweet or Hermione was too childish. Severus was at his best when he was feeling snarky. When he started falling in love with Hermione the change happened too rapidly. But I am being hypercritical.

2. I think you could have drawn out the story a bit. The 'falling in love' happened so fast. I didn't feel like you laid enough groundwork for their romance. It boiled down to Severus feeling protective and Hermione feeling lonely, (with mutual respect on both sides). That is a good start, but it needed more.

3. The 'Lucius-is-good' was too far out there for me. This is the guy who wanted all the mudbloods petrified... I just couldn't see it. But maybe that is just me.

Anyway... I'll quit my ramblings. I really loved your story. Please write more! Your descriptions are a true joy to read. I savored every detail.

May the Muse ramble your way often and untiringly!
~Fauna

Author's Response: Thank you. I am always happy when I can get someone to think about my story. I do appreciate criticism (as long as it is constructive, which yours is), as it helps me to improve on my shortcomings. I solemnly swear to do better next time!


Name: raquel (Signed) · Date: 12/03/07 9:22 · For: Revelations
i think it is Mrs Malfoy Great angle on the story

Author's Response: Thank you.


Name: Karya (Signed) · Date: 11/20/07 21:14 · For: Endings
wow that wz`so good!

Author's Response: Thanks. I am so pleased you enjoyed it.


Name: DracosBaby_232 (Signed) · Date: 11/10/07 14:46 · For: Endings
Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Author's Response: So glad you enjoyed this!


Name: DracosBaby_232 (Signed) · Date: 11/10/07 14:36 · For: Revelations
I'm thinking.....................Narcissa Malfoy or Pansy Parkinson. Most likely it's Narcissa.

Author's Response: Hmmm.... Good guess!


Name: DracosBaby_232 (Signed) · Date: 11/10/07 14:32 · For: Breakthroughs
This is gonna be very interesting to see.

Author's Response: All shall be revealed.


Name: DracosBaby_232 (Signed) · Date: 11/10/07 14:27 · For: Contemplations
Oi vey!!!!!! What are they thinking?!

Author's Response: Umm, not sure they are thinking about anything by the end of the chapter!


Name: DracosBaby_232 (Signed) · Date: 11/10/07 14:13 · For: Weaknesses
For her sake I hope it does. (LOVE the story)

Author's Response: yay! I am so glad you are enjoying it.


Name: DracosBaby_232 (Signed) · Date: 11/10/07 14:06 · For: Decisions
If Severus is in for the long haul he'll need lots of Firewhiskey.

Author's Response: Yip, but a drunk and grumpy Severus is not so much fun.


Name: DracosBaby_232 (Signed) · Date: 11/10/07 14:00 · For: Memories and Discoveries
This is getting good. Keep writing.

Author's Response: Thank you!


Name: DracosBaby_232 (Signed) · Date: 11/10/07 13:51 · For: Prologue
Yikes...................

Author's Response: Hmm.. I suppose that is a good reaction to reading about Vamire!Hermione.


Name: SasszSara (Signed) · Date: 11/08/07 8:16 · For: Endings
Great job! I really enjoyed this story, well done!

Author's Response: Thank you so much. I really enjoyed writing it.


Name: mock_turtle (Signed) · Date: 11/07/07 18:28 · For: Memories and Discoveries
if her powers are not affected by her becoming a vampire why doesn't she just magic the curtains closed?

so maybe I've read too many alternative vampire novels...but your premises (the whole transylvania/turning into a bat thing , the die-mudblood-whore, etc) seems a bit much. how come she's not sleeping in a coffin then?

I love the dramatic ending to this chapter. that was mastry.

Author's Response: Honestly, Hermione is just too frustrated with her situation, and did not think of using her magic to close the curains. I think she just needed the rest too. Transylvania was just a convinant way of adding in the vampire, with a bit of the mystery that comes from the old Bram Stoker novel. The Mudblood part was used to introduce who the vampire will turn out to be. None of my research turned up a proper "cure" for vampirism, so I used artistic licence, and decided to use the same licence so that my story would flow, and she did not have to sleep in a coffin.


Name: mock_turtle (Signed) · Date: 11/07/07 18:28 · For: Memories and Discoveries
if her powers are not affected by her becoming a vampire why doesn't she just magic the curtains closed?

so maybe I've read too many alternative vampire novels...but your premises (the whole transylvania/turning into a bat thing , the die-mudblood-whore, etc) seems a bit much. how come she's not sleeping in a coffin then?

I love the dramatic ending to this chapter. that was mastry.

Author's Response: Honestly, Hermione is just too frustrated with her situation, and did not think of using her magic to close the curains. I think she just needed the rest too. Transylvania was just a convinant way of adding in the vampire, with a bit of the mystery that comes from the old Bram Stoker novel. The Mudblood part was used to introduce who the vampire will turn out to be. None of my research turned up a proper "cure" for vampirism, so I used artistic licence, and decided to use the same licence so that my story would flow, and she did not have to slep in a coffin.


Name: mrsdan (Signed) · Date: 11/07/07 16:13 · For: Endings
Yay! But is it over now? Please say no!

Author's Response: Yes, the story is now finished. I am so glad you liked it so much.


Name: Jadis_Snape (Signed) · Date: 11/07/07 16:03 · For: Endings
Wonderful! Wonderful!!!! Bravo!!!! Encore Encore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Author's Response: Thank you so much.


Name: Lily Elegance (Signed) · Date: 11/07/07 10:11 · For: Endings
Aaaahhhh! Severus is happy! I really liked this story and couldn't wait for the end, I thought the vampire would be Bellatrix! I am so stupid sometimes.

Author's Response: I am so glad you followed and enjoyed this story. Dont feel stupid. It was a toss up for me whether to have the vampire be Bella or Narcissa. It was a good guess.


Name: Hazil (Anonymous) · Date: 11/06/07 17:07 · For: Revelations
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! woooooop!

next chap!! UPDATEUPDATE

pleases with little cherries on top and chocolate sprinkels and hundrends & thousands and chocolate sauce and strawberrie sauce =]

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Author's Response: Well, since you added hundreds and thousands AND chocolate sauce... The next chapter is in the que.


Name: mrsdan (Signed) · Date: 11/06/07 15:55 · For: Revelations
Bellatrix Lestrange?

Author's Response: Very close! Next chapter up soon!


Name: mrsdan (Signed) · Date: 11/06/07 15:41 · For: Contemplations
ahhhhh! Cliffhanger!

Author's Response: *Evil little smirk.* Oh dear. I've been playing with Severus too much!


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