hehe nice start i like i'm looking forward to the next chapter :)
well, I thought it was funny, anyway. Parker has a wierd sense of humor...though don't we all? lol
My fanfics are in queue, and I always get rejection letters for typos 3 weeks afterwards. hehe!
Has the second chapter been submitted yet?
Author's Response: No, but I'm working on it. I'm a bit stuck. I try to do a minumum of two pages...and as of now the story isn't going anywhere. I think I'm going to send Albus to Divination with Luna. ^_^ My friend thinks Albus is going to turn out evil because he has a wierd name and so did Voldemort (Marvolo?) :)
HI! It's ali! I FINALLY READ YOUR FANFIC! (calms down. sort of) Here are some things I noticed:
For some reason Albus didn’t fully understand, his father seemed sad at the thought of a snowy owl. He knew Harry had once owned a snowy owl, but Albus didn’t understand why this made Harry sad
This phrasing is a little awkward: maybe replace 'sad' with another word?
“Unrequited love,” Rose whispered to Albus, smirking as James looked hopefully at a group of girls passing the compartment. “Must be so depressing.”
hehe, love that line. Very well written! 'Ah, Irony' from your play is still my favorite, but this one is pretty awesome, too.
...the Divination Teacher, Professor Lovegood.
OH! Why didn't I think of that? Very, very nice idea. I can imagine her predictions now. Will they be in future chapters?
But Albus Potter couldn’t see the joy in this situation
:) like this line, too.
I look forward to more, and I'll see ya at school! Unless you're going to the football game, but that's off topic.
Author's Response: Heh. Best review...EVER! I'm glad you find my play funny, because a lot of it was inside jokes. I don't think Parker and Fernando found it funny. But. I'm not going to the football game because I think I'd be miserable cuz of a lot of stupid drama. So now I'm heading off to see if you have any fanfictions. If not, I shall go to the Beta forums and introduce myself. Ciao, Sangeeta (See you on Monday!)
Good start - erm, I don't see why it's in humor though... seemed sort of sad to me. :)
Author's Response: Thanks for pointing that out...I meant to put it under General, but they're right next to each other. It'll be kind of all genres, like sometimes funny, sometimes sad, sometimes happy, etc. Thanks for the review too. My first one was a good one. :)
