This is one heck of a poem; it made me tear up. =)
You don't see many things from Dumbledore's POV, especially poems, and this is really refreshing.
This characterisation of him is really well-done. He is so afraid to hurt those around him, and he feels so much remorse for everything he's done.
a train is coming
This is one of my favorite lines in the whole poem. It shows just how he is waiting to be forgiven, waiting for aburden to be lifted from his shoulders. It sent chills down my spine.
if what i did was
This made me tear up, because of COURSE he did it right. He's Dumbledore, but he just doesn't see himself in the same light everyone else does. I was happy when JKR made him more human and less godlike in DH, but it never changed my view of him.
I also love the way you set it up, and the way you wrote it. It makes it really effective, and makes it seem like his thoughts are scattered, which I'm sure they are.
And congrats on First Place for Infamous Words. *high fives* I can see why you won, dear. =)
Author's Response: *blush*rnrnAw, thanks, Hanni. When I wrote this I was fresh off DH and still in awe of/confused about the epic ending. 'King's Cross' was then my favourite chapter, so I wanted to do something to explain Dumbledore's POV in poetry-form.rnrn*grins again*rnrnPlus, I just love getting reviews and lovely compliments.rnrnThanks again!rnrn-Stubby
I loved it!!!!! Wow, that was so amazing. *speechless...* When I read the first line I was thinking, "geez, proofread for random capitalizations!" and then I saw a pattern....REMORSE. Nice touch.
Author's Response: *grin* Thanks! *snicker* Yeah, that's what most people think. But- hey, it's fun to do on occaision.
Very clever the way you inserted the word REMORSE in your fic. It was very unobviouse and inconspiciouse and would have gone unoticed if it wasan't for the fact that all of my poetry is written with codes and hidden messages too.=Sammy
Author's Response: Hey, thanks. Subtleness is good....
I picked up on it, wonderful Stubby! I loved the "REMORSE" thing. (I do that sometimes, but I never do it right... heh.)
This was a really powerful poem. I never would have thought about Dumbledore's feelings about his mistakes before I read this. You've forced me to think of a character in an entirely different light: And for that, I applaud you.
Author's Response: Aw! Thank you, Katie! *blushes* You've made me feel all warm and tingly inside! *applauds you back for such a wonderful review* -Stubby
*SNIFF* good story!!! or good poem, rather!
Author's Response: *grin* Thanks. What did you like about it?
good, very good.
and REMORSE hidden in there too! clever!
Author's Response: Hey, thanks! No one ever figures that out, so it's great to hear from someone who did. Glad you liked it as well. See you around! -Stubby
I think its awesome! Much better than I could do.I think you really got down the feelings that Dumbledore would be feeling at this time in his...death (i guess since he's not alive ;D ). I also think your last stanza is quite powerful. Like I said before I'm not really good at writing poetry (I just like reading it) so i can't really tell you if you need to improve in anything. But i enjoyied it so good job!
Author's Response: Hey, Black_Dust! ;) Thanks for the review. Poetry's really interesting to write, because you can pretty much do whatever you want. So, if you think you can't write poetry, it's just subjective: maybe you haven't found your type of poetry yet or a subject that works for you. I'm really terrible at rhyming, but then I started free poetry and created my own style and find that I enjoy it. People even seem to like it, too, so that's a bonus! I do like the last stanza as well. I was loking for a way to finish it, but then that popped into my head and it worked, so.... Thanks again! -Stubby