Reviewer: EatMyPixieDust
Date: 07/17/11 18:36
Chapter: Chapter One and Only!

Wow, I laughed the whole way through. Awesome job, I love the line /That by now, you've got less fans than George has got ears./ Your flow was good and rhyming effortless, the whole poem wonderfully witty. Three words describing this piece? My thoughts exactly.

Reviewer: ravenclaw1997
Date: 12/19/10 13:25
Chapter: Chapter One and Only!

OMG that's hilarious! I especially love the pop-tart part- I love pop-tarts, but not flaming ones! Translucent skin like parmesan cheese? LOL.

Great job! *goes to recommend to all of her friends*


Reviewer: Nymphie THE Original
Date: 05/22/10 12:03
Chapter: Chapter One and Only!

LOLZ!!!!! Wonderful! LURVE IT!!!!!

Reviewer: Sainyn Swiftfoot
Date: 08/19/08 11:12
Chapter: Chapter One and Only!

Hey... I had to write a review of the fic I like the most for a class on the Beta Boards, and I picked this poem, which is one of my favourites.

Here's my review:

My Review Of “The Dark Lord’s Eulogy: An Odious Ode”

This poem was nominated four times for Best Poem in the Quicksilver Quills Awards. I CAN’T see how it did not win.

The tone of this poem is Not like what you expect of normal poetry- that is, it isn’t emo, *angst* *angst* *angst*, EVERYONE HATES ME kind of thing. It’s light hearted, funny, and at the same time well written.

Schmergo is, and deservingly, called the Queen of humour. She makes you laugh with the summary and Author’s Chapter Notes itself, foretelling what sort of things to expect. Just look at these lines from the summary and Author’s Chapter Notes:

This is not very complimentary to Volders, so don't tell him about it if you see him around, okay?

I don't own Voldemort, but Harry Potter does PWN him.

The poem too is witty, and full of references and different kinds of humour. Schmergo takes everyday phrases like “Rest in peace”, “The good die young”, and twists them to make them funny, as demonstrated in these lines:

May your soul rest forever in pieces, dear Vold.

Just the good die young, which is why you died so old

Schmergo also makes references to other popular fics, such as her own “The Dark Lord’s Blog,” where there is that oh-so-famous line about blowing up a toaster by inserting into it a Pop-Tart. She references that in this line,

But somehow, you've wormed your way into my heart

And it now feels as charred as a flaming pop-tart.

References are a wonderful way of adding humour to a fic. It makes the reader go “Aah! That happened in that fic… LOL!!”

Schmergo also references the Harry Potter books itself with comparisons, some subtle, some more in-your-face…

For example, in this line:

You went out with a bang-- that's meant literally

Last words were the Death Curse; hey, it beats "Look at me."

That references Snape’s last words, “Look at me.” This is referencing the books itself, and this line made me roar with laughter.

Other than the funniness, the poem too is well structured, with a rhyming scheme that’s maintained really well till the end- there’s no struggle for a rhyme, or something that’s supposed to pass off as a rhyme, but isn’t…

The spelling, grammar, and punctuation are always impeccable, and are never sacrificed for the sake of rhyme.

There is, however, a little confusion about who’s POV it is from, because it could be from a character’s POV, or just from Schmergo’s. However, a good poem keeps you guessing, and so…

This poem, in my opinion, is exmplerary because it is a perfect blend of good humour, good writing, and good poetry.


Author's Response: Whoa! BB! I'm completely blushing-- this is absolutely wonderful. Thanks so much... I can't believe I got such a wonderful review for something I whipped off from the top of my head at lunchtime to amuse some kids at camp. I'm still not sure who originally gave me the name 'Queen of Humour,' since I'm not the best humour writer on the site, and nor am I the most popular, and only a few of my stories are in the humour category... but I still think it's a really flattering, lovely nickname! And I've always wanted to be Queen of something, as long as I don't have to marry Henry the Eighth and get my head lopped off a week later.

If it's not too much trouble, do you think you could tell me what this class is? I'd like to read some of the other assignments and see if there are any stories reviewed that I've either already read or that sound really interesting and would like to read.

Reviewer: Binka Fudge
Date: 07/22/08 16:09
Chapter: Chapter One and Only!

EXCELLENT! Sorry for all the CAPITALS and !'s, I'm hyped up on sugar.

Author's Response: Thanks! That's okay, I capitalize like everything. If you look at my review responses, they're pretty incoherent and filled with capital letters!

Reviewer: x0BOO0x
Date: 06/10/08 15:27
Chapter: Chapter One and Only!

Voldemort was one of my favorite characters. I was so sad to see him die- and then this poem put it in perspective. Fantastic job, as usual! Two thumbs and a big toe up!

Author's Response: That's a new one-- a "big toe," heh. Voldemort was one of my favourite characters, too, though for some reason, I just couldn't take him seriously in the seventh book. I wasn't sure whether this was because I'd spent so long mocking him or because JK Rowling couldn't take him seriously, either! But I actually did gasp and freak out a little bit when he died.

Reviewer: ringobeatlesfan4
Date: 04/12/08 17:14
Chapter: Chapter One and Only!

I can't say there's any chance that you'll be missed

I'll admit if you hadn't died, I would be... irritated.
^^Even my mom (who doesnt like fanfic because she thinks canon and only canon belongs in the world. But hey, she dont know what she's missing) laughed at this!

Looking back, did you ever feel any remorse

Other than that drunk night with the lampshade and horse?
^^*shudders* I havent thought about Voldy the same way since I read this. Good job! a zizzelion/10 {Becca}

Author's Response: I'm glad your mom laughed... my mom thought that line was Crass and Inappropriate. And she generally likes fanfic. As for the drunk night... well, I definitely prefer not to fill in the blanks as to what that was with my mind.

Reviewer: ginnyluvly
Date: 04/09/08 21:54
Chapter: Chapter One and Only!

I think I have reviewed this one! But it is so freaking good I had to read it again... I even -do you care?- wrote it down in a notebook and showed it to other insane people who laughed at it too (and were utterly surprised at my sillyness- and their own)... I loved sooo many lines... the pop-tart thing was totally refreshing, reminded me of Voldy's blog... and I was quite glad I was not -for the first time- completely lost when it comes to American lore or expressions (I am latinamerican, and your stories are so saturated with that sometimes I feel rather lost... but I'm learning, fear not!) Oh, and I was sad about Severus... The Prince's Tale was the chapter that has made me cry more than ever before in any book! Bit  of a softy for death and love and corny things... Anyways always loving everything you write, ginnyluvly, devoted fan

Author's Response: Wow, I am really glad that you liked this! I remember when I wrote it, I kept passing it around and showing it to everyone... most people just kind of stared at me and were like, "Ummm... nooo thanks." I need to be careful about using the Americanisms and stuff, seeing as this is all set in England... thanks for pointing that out. I was actually sad about Snape, too, even though he's never been one of my favourite characters... actually, he's always been one of my least favourite characters. But I felt like he deserved a better death scene at least... and more awesome last words than 'look at me,' which is just sad. :(

Reviewer: snapeadoodle
Date: 02/18/08 17:47
Chapter: Chapter One and Only!

Taking odes to a whole new level!! I love the analogies!! Maybe you should write about said drunk night with the lampshade and the horse....

Author's Response: Hahaha, I would but it might be Professors' rated and basically be an Equus ripoff...

Reviewer: Sainyn Swiftfoot
Date: 02/13/08 5:28
Chapter: Chapter One and Only!

This poem's such a blast,
So sad it went by fast.
Schmergo, You're the greatest of dudettes,
Your poem is going straight to my Favourites!

I absolutely loved your Ode, It was A-B-S-O-L-U-T-E-L-Y wonderful.

I was laughing all the way through!

My favourite lines:

Just the good die young, which is why you died so old

Last words were the Death Curse; hey, it beats "Look at me."

That by now, you've got less fans than George has got ears.

Author's Response: Awww, thank you! You are one cool person... first you make awesome artpad thingies, then you write a POEM as a review, which I have never gotten before.

Reviewer: the_weird_one
Date: 12/25/07 13:03
Chapter: Chapter One and Only!

HAHAHA so funny! Harry is writing this, right? After reading the dark lord's blog, I understand why harry would write this.

Author's Response: This looks familiar.

Reviewer: the_weird_one
Date: 12/25/07 13:00
Chapter: Chapter One and Only!

HAHAHA so funny! Harry is writing this, right? After reading the dark lord's blog, I understand why harry would write this.

Author's Response: Actually, it's from the point of view of me, Schmerg_The_Impaler (I wrote it the day after I read DH, rather traumatized), but now that you mention it, it makes a lot of sense from Harry's point of view.

Reviewer: HPisgreat72
Date: 12/17/07 21:09
Chapter: Chapter One and Only!

Pure comic genius! Schmergo you've impressed once again.

Author's Response: Awww, thank you so much!

Reviewer: clumsywerewolf2438
Date: 12/12/07 16:08
Chapter: Chapter One and Only!

That was great! I'm cracking up (still in library...but not the one that doesn't kick you out, even if you scream).

Author's Response: Thanks! Man, I wish I lived near that library...

Reviewer: Shortone
Date: 12/02/07 21:22
Chapter: Chapter One and Only!

That was a GREAT story! If you ever get the inclination, you set yourself up for a great story about the night with a lampshade and a horse.. that might be interesting to hear... Fantastic job, as always!!

Author's Response: Haha, thanks, but I think it might be Professor rated! However, do expect a nice Christmassy Voldemort story, if I can get it past the mods.

Reviewer: Hermione Lurves Ron
Date: 12/02/07 18:36
Chapter: Chapter One and Only!

I can't say there's any chance that you'll be missed

I'll admit if you hadn't died, I would be... irritated.


Author's Response: Thanks!

Reviewer: Mser22
Date: 11/15/07 20:15
Chapter: Chapter One and Only!

*dabs her eyes with a black hankerchief*
some should truly wear lack to while reading this eugoly, dead good.
i really enjoy your work! keep it up!

Author's Response: Thanks! Sorry I made you sob with my incredibly tragic and moving poetic epic! (Er, I mean, short, silly, and stupid poem...)

Reviewer: PorcelainRose
Date: 11/12/07 16:19
Chapter: Chapter One and Only!

you are a genious!
And your random and crazy and... I LOVE YOU!
Hey, I know I only reviewed you yestoday for the first time but hey! I know love when I see it! Or read it...

Author's Response: Awwww, thank you! Unfortunately, I am not accepting marriage proposals at this time. ^_^ No, but seriously, thank you for your lovely reviews.

Reviewer: Luna_Lovegood11
Date: 11/07/07 16:52
Chapter: Chapter One and Only!

Haha, I just reread this and i cracked up!!!! i didnt get the poptart crack before, but then i read the dark lord's blog... I have yet to try it!!!! *grins evilly* luv ur story!!!

Author's Response: Fwahahahaha, thank you! I don't think you should try the pop-tart thing... if you died, I'd have less readers! ^_^

Reviewer: PadfootnPeeves
Date: 11/05/07 18:04
Chapter: Chapter One and Only!

they say the good die young, which is why you died so old
loved that line! love the story! 1829843029374/10!

Author's Response: Thank you! I made up the first two lines, and the rest of the poem kinda wrote itself. I'm glad you like it, and I'm glad you gave it such a ker-azy rating.

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