Nice story once again! The song lyrics were really fitting, especially the last line of the second one "What have I become?" - really fits Sirius' situation. It was nicely written (although I have to say I liked your descriptions/imagery in Seedling better) and explored Sirius' character and his guilt really well. It showed how the jokey Marauder Sirius became the Sirius of the books (if you take it that he didn't die) really clearly. Personally I'm not much of a fan of James/Sirius, but it was well-written and enjoyable anyway. Also, the fact that James had an on-the-side affair with Sirius seemed a little unbelievable to me... I'd always imagined James so desperately in love with Lily that he'd do nothing to jeopardise their relationship, but I guess you've just got a different interpretation... after all not that much is known about James and Lily from the books. So yeah, very enjoyable and dark read.
Author's Response: Yes, I do love Breaking Benjamin. :) Since this story was written about two years before Seedling, my writing style wasn't the same and so the description would seem different; but I'm glad that you still liked it despite the simplicity. I have to agree with you about the believability of James and Sirius... I don't think it would happen either, but I do think it would be interesting, and I'm just a sucker for slash. ;) Thanks again!
Oh man. I was quite literally crying in the middle of this story. Excellent work!
I thought the story was very believable. The Lily/James/Sirius love triangle was great but sad, seeing as Sirius's love was pretty unrequited. Sirius's guilt was very likely as well, and his death was almost poetic in a way.
I would suggest not using such technical phrases like 'resulting in trouble breathing' and such. It takes away from the flow and poetry of the whole story.
Very well written, and kudos for the tricky pairing.
Author's Response: Thanks for your lovely review! I'm glad you found it believable - I worked hard on keeping it as in character as possible, considering the situation. And I'll make sure to avoid using phrases like that in future stories. Thanks again! :)
Wow...this was amazing. It was so heartbreaking. I loved the Sirius/James, too, as that's my fav ship but I never ever seen it before! Great job.
Author's Response: Thanks so much! I'm glad you liked it :)
o my god!
o my god!
o my god!
o my god!
WHAT THE HELL!!!
it was good though.
Author's Response: Um.. thanks, I guess?
I LUV THIS STORY!!! You have a good reason to be proud of it. I like this story because its very discriptive. I can picture each scene perfectly. Its also very dark, and I like dark stories. Write another story like this!!
Author's Response: Thanks so much! :) I was aiming for dark here, so I'm glad it is! Thanks for reviewing!
awwwwwwwwwwwww! poor Sirius! this is a great story, but it's sad also! so Sirius died? Nooooooooooooooooooooooooo! i liked Sirius! but oh well, this was a really good story! brava! brava! and then a bravo! both the feminine and the male-en version of applause! and clap clap whistle clap!
Author's Response: Lol thanks so much! :D I'm glad you like it! Hm... I never flat-out said that Sirius died, so it's up to you to decide! Thanks again!
