Reviewer: inspirations
Date: 11/08/08 14:08
Chapter: Time for Forgiveness

A petite, raven haired woman sat up a wooden log, idly playing on a lyre. - this line confused me, which isn’t good, as it is the first.

Otherwise, the worst you did was drop a few commas. I think this was a really interesting idea - the words you used gave it the element of magic. The language, the order. I liked the poem in the middle, it was a nice touch.

I’ll look out for more from you :)



Author's Response: Thanks for the review! Never been told the first line is confusing before, but I'll take a look...Thanks again!

Reviewer: Cheshlin
Date: 07/05/07 16:34
Chapter: Time for Forgiveness

I loved this story when I read it. I feel you really captured the feelings of this moment! great job!!! Cyns

Author's Response: Thanks Cyns. You know my fondness of the Arthurian legends better then anyone!

You must login (register) to review.
Information
Find out everything you need to know about the site right here.


We have stories and authors in this archive.

:

RSS
Choose Theme:
SOCIAL MEDIA
     
MOST RECENT
Silver Platters by Padfoot11333 3rd-5th Years
Roxy Weasley writes, and Lucy Weasley reads.
A Squib's Journey by ntoforhp 6th-7th Years
Jeffery Potter always had sensed he was somehow different from his playmates...
Out of the Blue by Secret Marauder 90 1st-2nd Years
This story weaves the tale of James and Lily from the day they met right up...
FEATURED
Where Light and Shadow Meet by Ennalee 1st-2nd Years
All his life, Percy has built and gathered, painted and carved, and now everything...
Different in the Morning by Gmariam 3rd-5th Years
Seventh year is almost over, and after indulging in the kitchen a bit too much...
Rid of Me by littlebird 6th-7th Years
Hermione gets the cat, the flat, the food, and the furniture. Ron gets the family...
CATEGORIES